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Welcome to Adaptable | Behavior Explained! By understanding the stress and anxiety habit loops present in our lives, we can eventually ease ourselves into different behaviors around these difficult emotions. Join me as we talk about what you can do, to tame your anxiety with EMDR Therapy.
I'm Kelly O'Horo, Attachment based EMDR Therapist, EMDRIA Consultant, and Advanced Trainer. I'm a mom of 5, Nonna of 5, wife, and a healer. I have the honor of spending my workdays walking along side people while they brave their healing journeys. I try to live with the generous assumption that we're all doing the best we can with what we know. Therapists are teachers for the "life stuff" and "emotional vocabulary" that may not have been learned due to gaps in our care givers capabilities. In the last 15 years I've learned that people are freaking amazing, resilient, and inspiring. Most importantly, we are hardwired for connection and for healing!
I hope to bring an authentic, compassionate, and unpolished approach while we explore a variety of topics such as parenting, marriage, relationships, dating, trauma, attachment, adoption, depression, addiction, anxiety, and love! There's a why for all behaviors and an explanation that makes perfect sense as emotion is at the root of it all.
-- Links --
https://linktr.ee/kellyohorolpc
https://youtu.be/rLnARKekvgo
https://www.emdria.org/find-an-emdr-therapist/
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0:06
hi everyone I'm Kell ooro and this is
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adaptable Behavior explained hi
0:12
everybody thank you so much for tuning
0:14
in today we're going to talk about the
0:15
topic of anxiety and how we can heal our
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anxiety symptoms we're going to discuss
0:21
a powerful therapy modality that's
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gaining popularity for its Effectiveness
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in not just treating PTSD and other
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presenting issues but also anxiety IM
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movement desensitization and
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reprocessing or EMDR is an awesome
0:34
therapy modality that can help reduce
0:37
the symptoms of anxiety and if this is a
0:41
topic that you're interested in please
0:42
make sure that you like it or share it
0:44
with someone who might benefit as well
0:45
as subscribe to our channel so that you
0:47
don't miss any future episodes let's
0:49
talk about anxiety it can indeed be a
0:52
manifestation of unresolved trauma so
0:54
when a person experiences trauma the
0:56
nervous system often becomes
0:58
disregulated and the body can hold on to
1:01
this energy as a protective mechanism
1:04
sort of waiting for the other shoe to
1:05
drop creates this sense that I can
1:08
control something and anxiety can show
1:10
up in a variety of different ways but
1:12
this trapped energy can manifest and
1:14
feels like like an overwhelm exponential
1:18
amount of energy and it's essentially
1:21
the body's attempt to remain in a state
1:23
of heightened alertness to potential
1:25
threats so the body adapts to stimulus
1:28
by maintaining a state of vigilance or
1:30
hyperarousal and it can be exhausting if
1:32
you deal with this you know what I'm
1:34
talking about it can also be really
1:35
overwhelming because we just want it to
1:37
stop we want it to go away and we want
1:39
to feel better and the bad news about
1:42
any emotion is that the harder we try to
1:44
push it away the longer that it persists
1:47
so part of the experience of helping
1:49
ourselves move through anxiety States is
1:52
to lean into the emotion and let it be
1:55
what it needs to be and be curious about
1:57
what it's connected to symptoms of
1:59
resolved trauma can also include
2:02
hypervigilance dissociation control
2:05
issues and physical symptoms like
2:06
headaches or even digestive difficulties
2:10
so the body and its attempt to protect
2:12
itself might create these adaptations to
2:14
manage the ongoing stress response that
2:17
was initially triggered by a traumatic
2:19
event so let me give you an example of
2:21
how this might show up let's talk about
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uh a story about a client we'll call him
2:26
Alex so Alex was in a minor car accident
2:28
a few years ago and although physically
2:30
unharmed the experiences was was pretty
2:33
traumatic now whenever Alex hears the
2:36
sound of a car uh horns tires screeching
2:39
uh engines revving their heart races and
2:42
they feel a wave of anxiety and this is
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because the sounds are similar to those
2:46
from the accident so it triggers a
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stress response in Alex's body acting as
2:51
if what was happening then is happening
2:53
now that sound is a memory transport so
2:57
despite the accident being in the past
2:59
Alex is nervous system still reacts as
3:01
if the danger is present and it's a
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common symptom of unresolved trauma and
3:06
so this reaction is an attempt by their
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body to prepare for um and avoid similar
3:12
traumatic events but we all know that
3:14
related to driving so much is truly
3:16
powerless because other people can do
3:19
things that are not safe and put us at
3:21
risk if we're on the road so this is
3:23
really unhelpful uh because our
3:25
anxiousness doesn't prevent those those
3:27
dangerous things from happening so the
3:29
anxiety manifests as a physical
3:32
sensation a reminder of the past trauma
3:34
that Alex's body hasn't fully processed
3:37
or released it's thwarted in time it
3:39
hasn't fully let go so now this anxious
3:43
response seems more obvious to be tied
3:45
to a prior event but I'd like to share
3:47
another uh experience that might be more
3:49
common uh as a presentation of anxiety
3:52
which many of us probably can relate to
3:55
and that's about perfectionism as an
3:57
anxious response to shame and potential
3:59
re ction so let's let's talk about
4:02
another client example let's imagine a
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student uh we'll call them Jamie who
4:07
once experienced a low grade um even
4:10
though they worked really hard on a
4:11
major project and so despite the fact
4:14
that this happened several years ago
4:16
Jaimie still feels the sting of that
4:18
perceived failure the shame uh the
4:22
disappointment of self the rejection
4:24
from parents peers or teachers and as a
4:27
result Jim's developed a strong
4:29
perfectionist ISC streak driven by the
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fear of experiencing that same kind of
4:33
disappointment and judgment again so
4:35
Jamie spends excessive hours studying
4:38
perfecting every assignment redoing
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things that are good enough and often at
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the expense of sleep other social
4:45
activities or having any fun they said
4:48
unrealistic uh high standards for
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themselves and feel significant anxiety
4:53
at the thought of submitting work that
4:55
might be less than perfect this
4:57
perfectionism is an anxious response
4:59
respon it's a way for Jamie to try to
5:01
control the environment and avoid the
5:03
pain of failure or perceived rejection
5:07
so any of you relate to this it's really
5:10
frustrating when we know we've done a
5:12
good job and we just can't let ourselves
5:13
feel that so this Behavior can lead to a
5:16
cycle of anxiety and stress as the
5:18
pressure Jaimie puts on themselves to
5:21
achieve Perfection it's both exhausting
5:23
it's unsustainable we can't keep up with
5:25
this and it's a protective mechanism so
5:28
it was it was learned at the time of the
5:30
first experience or others similar in
5:32
nature but it's no longer needed because
5:35
we don't have control over the outcome
5:37
as long as we do our best it's really
5:38
all we can do so this this response or
5:41
this adaptation of perfectionism can
5:43
have negative consequences on mental
5:45
health and well-being the process of
5:47
healing involves addressing the trauma
5:49
allowing the nervous system to regulate
5:52
and release that trapped energy from the
5:54
past and therapeutic approaches often
5:56
focus on helping individuals process
5:58
their trauma develop coping strategies
6:01
and work towards a state of nervous
6:03
system regulation that is needed and so
6:05
wanted anxiety can feel overwhelming it
6:08
traps us in a cycle of worry and fear
6:11
but what if there was a way to tame
6:13
those anxious thoughts and find relief
6:15
that's where EMDR therapy comes in uh it
6:17
was developed in the late 80s by
6:19
psychologist Francine Shapiro and if you
6:21
want to learn more about this in depth
6:23
you can watch uh the episodes on what is
6:26
EMDR Parts one and two so but it's
6:30
become a widely recognized and used
6:33
approach for treating various mental
6:34
health conditions including an anxiety
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disorders so how exactly does the MDR
6:40
work well I'm not going to dig in too
6:42
deeply but it's based on the idea that
6:44
disturbing memories or experiences can
6:46
get stuck in our brains and in our
6:47
bodies and it leads us to emotional
6:49
distress and negative beliefs about
6:52
ourselves EMDR helps to reprocess these
6:55
memories in a way that reduces the
6:57
emotional intensity and allows us to ref
6:59
frame them more positively it also helps
7:02
to give us access to Adaptive
7:05
information that's much more useful for
7:07
the current situation one of the key
7:10
components of EMDR is bilateral
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stimulation which can involve moving the
7:14
eyes back and forth tapping on the body
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or using other auditory cues like sound
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or music but this bilateral stimulation
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along with several other factors helps
7:23
to address and resolve traumatic
7:25
memories and reduces their emotional
7:27
impact so how information lives in our
7:30
bodies actually changes which is so
7:33
awesome because that's where the freedom
7:34
is but EMDR isn't about reliving past
7:37
traumas it's about reviewing uh
7:39
emotionally trapped information that got
7:42
stuck and is no longer needed it focuses
7:45
on building resilience it develops
7:47
coping skills to manage anxiety in the
7:49
present and through a series of
7:51
structured phases EMDR helps people
7:53
identifi triggers and challenge the
7:56
negative beliefs that got stuck at the
7:58
time of the event and it helps to
8:00
cultivate a sense of safety and
8:01
empowerment in the now so we feel
8:03
totally different about ourselves we
8:05
don't just get a state change but we get
8:07
a full trait change a an
8:09
all-encompassing experience of I'm
8:12
enough and I've done enough and my best
8:14
is enough and it's a full U perspective
8:17
change on self so you might be wondering
8:20
is the MDR therapy right for me well
8:22
it's important to to consult with a
8:24
qualified therapist who can assess your
8:26
individual needs and determine whether
8:28
it is a good fit for you your presenting
8:30
issues um I know that I'm an EMDR
8:32
therapist who uses it really with every
8:34
presenting issue and find great success
8:36
with it but it's typically used as part
8:38
of a comprehensive treatment plan that
8:41
can also include other therapeutic
8:43
modalities and support services groups
8:45
classes readings Etc so if you're
8:48
considering this uh there are a few
8:50
things to keep in mind find a licensed
8:52
therapist who's trained and certified in
8:54
EMDR therapy when possible be open and
8:57
honest with your therapist about your
8:59
concerns and your goals for treatment
9:01
and don't wait till 6 months in to tell
9:03
them the things that you do to adapt to
9:04
stress because they can help you with
9:06
those too trust the process and give
9:09
yourself permission to experience
9:10
whatever thoughts and emotions arise
9:12
during therapy because we can't really
9:14
control what our brain needs us to
9:16
access for healing and so it's a bit
9:19
about surrender which is pretty
9:20
uncomfortable for people who like to
9:22
have control about things make sure you
9:24
practice self-care and coping strategies
9:26
between sessions that'll help support
9:28
your overall well-being remember that
9:30
healing from anxiety it takes time it's
9:32
a process but with effort and the right
9:34
support and resources it's possible to
9:36
find relief and to reclaim your life if
9:39
you're interested in learning more about
9:40
EMDR therapy be sure to check out our
9:42
show notes for additional resources and
9:44
information that's all I have for you
9:46
for today I hope that you found this
9:48
helpful and useful and perhaps uh
9:51
someone you know could benefit from
9:52
learning a little bit more about a way
9:54
out of anxiety until next time don't
9:56
forget to lead with love it'll never
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steer you wrong
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[Music]
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you
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[Music]
#Mental Health
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