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hi everyone I'm Kell ooro and this is
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adaptable Behavior about myself you know
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I'm not good enough I'm not smart enough
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I'm not safe I'm powerless there's
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nothing I can do the way we experience
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the world we sometimes get stuck because
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of the way memory gets thwarted in time
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and it kind of acts as if it's still
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happening right so we end up with with
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with trauma responses that are based in
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a Time orientation issue in the past
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yeah and so ultimately we're working
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with memory and all of the memory work
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that we address in EMDR therapy has to
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do with resolving memory that was
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thwarted in time so what if I only have
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one traumatic event happen to me some
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people claim they don't have any
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traumatic events but they know
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something's not quite right very true
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and they come in and they go my
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childhood was perfect everything was
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great my parents loved me I have no
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problems but I don't know why I am so
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anxious or I don't know why I always
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have to be perfect or I don't know why I
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can't tolerate when my husband's upset
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with me and so we take whatever the
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presenting issues are and we decide how
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are we going to approach from an EMDR
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therapy approach or the AIP lens what
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are we going to use are we going to need
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to use some techniques that help just
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create some stress reduction or some
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symptom reduction is that primarily what
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someone wants to address or is there a
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specific protocol maybe they want to
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address an addiction or maybe they have
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a phobia about something so we might
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want to use a specific protocol to
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address a presenting problem but the way
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I tend to approach my clients for the
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most part is really with a full
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comprehensive psychotherapeutic approach
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because what I love about EMDR therapy
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is it doesn't just it's not just for
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symptom reduction we can address
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problems with low self-esteem we can
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address developmental deficits from
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attachment injuries and help to promote
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adaptive responses in the now that
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better match our current level of safety
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and our current selves and ultimately a
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more adult response that has space
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between the stimulus and our reaction so
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that it matches who I want to be more in
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line with the values that I hold today
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so it can be a really comprehensive full
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approach and I think that it's so
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beautiful because it promotes personal
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growth it promotes the Therapeutic
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Alliance so the relationship is so
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critical kind of like an EFT therapy
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honestly where we really rely on in a
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full comprehensive psychotherapeutic
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relationship is the greatest predictor
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for outcome and that's in all therapies
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quite frankly right and so I love with
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with using MDR therapy that there's this
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momentto moment Attunement and awareness
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where we're able to help build in real
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time repair right we're be we're able to
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show up for a client now in ways that
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people didn't address them in the past
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and so they can start to make new
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memories yeah in accordance with what's
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true now and so through the the
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therapeutic relationship and uh
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connection and safety in the now people
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start to build more capacity to tolerate
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distress but they also build trust and
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resilience right right I think that
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speaks so much to about how humans are
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made for connection right and if we can
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model that as a therapist and they can
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try it on in the real world quote
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unquote I say right what a beautiful
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thing as almost an investment to
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themselves long term as you're talking
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about for all these future relationships
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and things they practice they practice
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with us so that they can they can
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emulate or replicate the safety in this
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relationship and moving it out into the
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relationship I always say borrow it from
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until you own it for perfect absolutely
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so EMDR Works to address three prongs IT
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addresses the past IT addresses present
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triggers and present issues and it also
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addresses future experiences so when
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someone comes in and they say something
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like I've never been in a a plane crash
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I've never had anything bad happen to me
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in an airplane but I am just petrified
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to go on an airplane we can actually
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Target proactively an anticipatory
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address imagining being in the plane
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Imagining the worst case scenario and we
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can reprocess future anxiety around
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worst case scenario situations bringing
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relief to a person and allowing them
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some capacity to go on that that plane
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trip that's so awesome right you know
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being able to think ahead in that way
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too so I'm coming to therapy and I'm
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ready to start EMDR what exactly does
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that process look like so EMDR therapy
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is an eight-phase process okay and a lot
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of times clients will say you know I
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went to another EMDR therapist but you
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know we never did any reprocessing and I
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say how many times did you see them oh I
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went four times but we never did any
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reprocessing and so I'll say Well when
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we're using this lens of treatment we
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are thinking through things globally and
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so there are eight phases and the first
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phase and you might have only ended up
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in the first couple cou of phases and
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maybe that's why you didn't do any
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reprocessing but we have to do a
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thorough history taking if we're doing a
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comprehensive approach so we still have
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to get a thorough history from our
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clients people need to tell us you know
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their stories and we need our
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generational history we need Grandma and
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Grandpa we need Mom and Dad because the
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way I'm listening is how far back did
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someone need to learn the adaptations
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that they are currently dealing with and
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so I'm listening for the landscape of
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their story their history their uh their
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socioeconomic backgrounds the the
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careers and jobs that their parents and
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grandparents had I'm listening for where
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were their parents in birth order was
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there any trauma in their fam's stories
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so there's a lot of history that I want
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to be thorough about especially when
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thinking about that developmental lens
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and the attachment traumas that happen
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in so many people cuz I want to hear
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where did these fractures originate and
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it might not just be in the story of the
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client in front of me it might be that
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they're carrying some of the
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generational burden of their pain yeah
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absolutely so the second phase that we
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have to address is the preparation phase
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this is where we do psycho education we
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do stabilization we teach some coping
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skills but most importantly we learn if
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the client can State change meaning I
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can go from a state of arousal and I can
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trust that my body can bring me back to
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a state of calm calm me enough we don't
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have to be calm calm but we have to know
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that we can shift a little bit and
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that's what we're working on to to
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understand in preparation phase and it's
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important that once we have the ability
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for State change that we can do some
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some reprocessing so phase three is the
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assessment phase this is where a client
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says to us this is what I want to work
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on these are the problems that I'm
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struggling with this is how I want my
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life to look when it's effective and
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then this is where we reverse engineer
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what we're dealing with the present
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presenting issue and that it's tied back
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in memory somewhere in the past and
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these are where the presenting issues
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are um stuck or thwarted in real time
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and so we'll assess and then we get into
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the desensitization phase and in that
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phase we are actually actively
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reprocessing memories in that phase we
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are combining a set of specific elements
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and we are using specific protocols in
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order to address the um the mad ly
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encoded material and so after the the
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desensitization phase we are then doing
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what we call an installation phase so we
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are plucking out the negative belief
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that got stuck in our trauma time and we
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are installing something that's more
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adaptive so if my negative belief was
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you know I'm not good enough then my
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positive belief is I am enough I'm good
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enough as I am and so it's really
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beautiful because now we're working our
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way still reprocessing but on a more
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adaptive side of our memory networks and
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it's so powerful and exciting to get to
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see people really start to believe the
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truth about what's now which is I am
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enough even if other people don't like
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what I did or what I said or I don't
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have to be perfect I'm enough as I am
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and then of course the next phase is our
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body scan when we are dealing with
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trauma our body is the first to adapt
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and it's the last to let go so we're
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checking our work we're we're fully
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installing a positive belief after we've
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reprocessed the memories associated with
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current day issues and we are checking
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the body for any residual tension or
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tightness or perhaps information or data
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that says we've got more work to do and
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so we check the body for the rest of the
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work related to this memory MH
