Making friendships in adulthood means facing rejection and trying anyway.
It’s not always a “no.” Sometimes it’s just timing. Sometimes the fit isn’t right.
But meaningful connection begins after we choose to keep reaching out.
As adults, friendship takes courage — initiative — and a willingness to risk vulnerability.
Because the reward? Finding people who truly get you.
Watch the full episode: https://youtu.be/chZobg11fqM
#AdultFriendships #OvercomingRejection #FindYourPeople #ConnectionMatters #YouAreNotAlone
Show More Show Less View Video Transcript
0:00
And so now we're going to talk about the
0:01
emotional side of things, which is uh
0:04
which is the tricky part. And some of us
0:05
are just not willing to risk the
0:07
rejection, but I want to talk a little
0:09
bit about why it's really worth it. Um,
0:12
as a counselor, I'll tell my clients I'm
0:14
not everybody's flavor. I'm not
0:16
everybody's cup of tea, and that's okay.
0:17
And that if we need to find another
0:19
person for them, I it's not personal. I
0:21
totally understand that. And the same
0:23
thing goes with friendships.
0:25
Making friends as an adult takes risk.
0:28
You might not be someone's flavor. You
0:30
might not be someone's vibe vibe. Uh,
0:33
you know, you might reach out and get a
0:35
no or several I'm busies in a row. And
0:37
that might feel awkward or like
0:39
rejection. But here's the truth.
0:41
Everyone wants connection. Everyone.
0:43
There's no exception to that. And so,
0:45
you want to continue to keep trying and
0:47
reaching out. One of my best friends
0:48
ever is in my close tight circle because
0:51
she was one of the first friends that I
0:53
ever had that that reached out to me. We
0:56
we first met many many years ago. Uh we
0:59
were out we were on a vacation and we
1:01
met at the beach. And afterwards she
1:03
followed up with a phone call. Let's get
1:04
dinner. And I thought no one does that.
1:06
No one takes the initiative. And she she
1:08
was also a planner. And so it was really
1:10
refreshing for me to to meet someone who
1:13
took the initiative. And it wasn't just
1:15
me that took the reigns and the
1:17
opportunity for connection. And I was
1:18
like so excited about that. And then
1:20
what I learned was through several
1:23
meetings like that, our families had a
1:24
lot in common. and our kids were
1:26
relatively the same age and we developed
1:28
a friendship and then we started doing
1:29
things like trips together and we really
1:32
um deepened our relationship. But had we
1:35
not come up to each other, you know, at
1:37
the beach that day, this wouldn't have
1:38
happened. But it took that risk. It took
1:40
that potential for rejection and facing
1:43
it because that's what opens doors. So
1:45
rejection doesn't mean that you're
1:47
unworthy. It just means that there might
1:49
be timing issues for the person or maybe
1:52
the fit isn't just right. just keep
1:55
trying. That reward is eventually a
1:58
friend or friends who gets you. And that
2:01
is really worth the discomfort because
2:03
we really do better when we do life with
2:06
others. And as we age, this is harder.
2:08
And so finding your people is trickier,
2:13
but we have to kind of reduce some of
2:15
the limitations that we used to put on
2:17
our choices. So, not necessarily
2:20
thinking people need to be the same age
2:21
as you or into the same, you know, faith
2:24
as you or necessarily the same interest.
2:27
We want to expand our circle of
2:29
potential or possibility when we're
2:31
making adult friends. So, start with
2:33
some shared interests. You know, join a
2:35
book club or a fitness class. I know
2:37
that my husband and I just recently
2:39
changed locations where we keep our boat
2:41
and we're now part of a yacht club. and
2:44
we're going to all of these events
2:46
because it's giving us a chance to meet
2:47
new people and find common interests
2:50
with people and it's been really really
2:52
fun to explore new relationships with
2:55
people that I wouldn't have had
2:56
opportunities to do that with. But we're
2:58
part of a club where people are all
3:00
interested in boating and water and
3:02
there's a shared interest and we've made
3:04
friends that are much younger than us
3:06
and we've made friends that are much
3:07
older than us and um what's really
3:10
important is that you don't limit
3:11
yourself by age because some of those
3:13
rich friendships can really span decades
3:15
and that's kind of fun. And I really
3:18
enjoy, you know, the wisdom from making
3:20
friends that are older and also the the
3:23
vitality and the vivaciousness of making
3:25
friends with people that are younger. It
3:26
keeps you wanting to stretch. one of my
3:28
dear friends is is quite a bit younger
3:30
and professionally we have a lot in
3:32
common and so we've really bonded over
3:35
shared values and shared interests and
3:37
similar personalities and and and over
3:40
time you know she's become part of an
3:42
inner circle that I value and so
3:44
connection isn't needing to be limited
3:46
by age it's about resonance it's about
3:48
energy and so make sure you don't limit
3:50
yourself by those Thanks.
#Family & Relationships
#Self-Help & Motivational

