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About Page Teardown for Oyler Creative
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Sep 17, 2019
Today we are doing an About Page Teardown for Oyler Creative. Here are some of the questions we are addressing: What does your headline say? value prop Do you pinpoint my pain? Can I see a future better self? Is your company credible? social proof, etc Do you have a story to tell? Do you call me to action?
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hey guys this is not a Todd with copy
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flight I'm gonna do a about page
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teardown
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this one is for Paul boiler boiler I
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office Savior name correctly Paul but if
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whether creative and he's affectionately
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known to the so those of us on Twitter
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as Pepe he is in the WordPress community
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he's a good man
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so anyway just to get going there it's
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gonna be we're gonna look at five or six
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questions the first one is what does
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your headline say number two did you do
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you pinpoint mount pain three can I see
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a future better self for is your company
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credible five do you have a story to
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tell and six do you call me action so I
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will drop those in the notes that's on
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YouTube as well as the article that's at
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the company flat blog so with that in
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mind let's take a look at what we have
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here first you see he does have a
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headline so that's that's the first
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thing I think Paul is actually
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downloaded my about page framework so he
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has a headline here and it does say
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something he he says we focus on your
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website so you can focus on your
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business which is a big pain point for a
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lot of small businesses they just don't
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have the time to do that so that's a
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that's a really a really nice headline
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to get going it's obvious from the
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beginning he's trying to appeal the
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people who are short on time and but
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need to have a website presence so in
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the second paragraph he has a mission
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which i think is really good I think
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it's always good if you can put a
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mission even but short in your about
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page it gives shows that you have
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something from which you are basing what
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you're doing but what I would do here
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looking at your your page Paul this
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third paragraph right here to me
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it pinpoints the pain point it pinpoints
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the pain of your customer and I would
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like to see it be the first paragraph in
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your about page so it's pretty well done
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we know that there are a lot of DIY
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website platforms out there he's
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immediately addressing a possible
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objection and TV commercials make them
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look easy but before you realize you you
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have spent hours attempting to create a
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website that doesn't look good or
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function like you want that right there
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is a common point of pain for loss small
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businesses and ministries that the kind
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of people that Paul appeals to with his
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business so very good I think that
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should be your first paragraph that's my
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opinion you do mention that you have a
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history of experience WordPress websites
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and I think that's good to know you
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mentioned that you worked with it since
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2000 so that's a good right there you've
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been doing this for - since 2000 so that
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is 19 years of service Paul what I would
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say is that you you tell people about
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you but you really don't show so the
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thing I would say is the question that
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comes up is your company credible I
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think your company is credible if you
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had a couple of really powerful
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testimonies they would go really good
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right here I think I think that if you
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put those testimonials on this page a
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couple that really say hey we hired Paul
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to do this for us and this is the
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benefit we received from using his
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services that in my opinion would be a
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good place to put that testimony on this
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page so that County answers the question
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is your company credible I think you are
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credible I just think that you need to
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find some some social proof if you will
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to go on there and it might even be
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maybe you have taken a wordpress course
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or some kind of recognized award maybe
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you maybe you did up spot course on
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online marketing I don't know
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but those kind of things would be good
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right there would like for you to sit
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tell a little bit of story I know that's
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not easy to do for yourself but in you
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know even a story just about how you
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started your business maybe a hardship
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you you came through just to show that
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you're human or how would even say
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because I know some things about your
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ball I know that you have done
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weightlifting because I've seen the
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pictures I know that you like the
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Grateful Dead and classic rock music as
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we've discussed that before I know you
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like dirt track racing any any one of
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those things could be something that you
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could put in that tells a little bit
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something about you and might be
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something that other business owners
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would resonate with so kind of create a
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connection between you and them can I
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see my future self I don't know that you
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really show that but I think that's
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something that you could benefit from on
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this page just is telling people what it
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would look like working with Paul you
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know and that and that could come in the
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form of testimony so somebody says hey
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I've never really think much about it
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because Paul's taking care of it but I
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do know that we're making you know
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business from our website whatever a
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testimonial could do a good job with
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that as well but the idea is even if you
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use the what I call the imagine
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statements imagine not worrying about
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your website not worrying that you need
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to update something imagine being able
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to just send an email to someone and
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they take care of it for you imagine
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statements are good for for that as well
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so that's something you might consider
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the last question is do you call me
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action I think you do that you have one
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right here
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contact oil or creative and then you
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have another one down here with a
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call-to-action button I want peace of
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mind peace of mind is what you're
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focusing on as a call to action so I
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think that's really good the other thing
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I would add to that is besides
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contacting you I would I would find a
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way to get people on your email list
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either a giveaway worksheet or checklist
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or something like that or even just a
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scam asana for regular updates that you
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may send people another thing you might
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consider doing is if you have a lower
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end product that maybe doesn't cost as
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much but it could be a you know a paid
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discovery session or you know a website
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audit or something like that lower in
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whether it's free or even you know just
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a few dollars I think that would be a
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good thing to put your or your best
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service so if you have a good service
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that you really that people really get
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the most out of I would feature that so
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I would look at one of those three four
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things have a haven't something to get
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you on an email list a low end product
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as far as price goes a less expensive or
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or a discovery session or something like
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that consultation I do like the free
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consultation idea but also your best
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service so if your best service is
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WordPress management and you have a a
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monthly plan that you put people on and
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just you know first fixed price and you
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take care of things that would be
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possibly a good thing to put on this
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page as well but you do have a call to
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action so I do think that's a really
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good thing not bad about page very very
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good a lot better than most I see I
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certainly think you can tweak some
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things and that I mentioned in the video
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so I could jump off I will chat with you
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guys later
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