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Is He Love Bombing You? Signs He Is!
Sep 9, 2022
So you met a new guy. Is he love bombing you, stringing you along or is he genuine? Is a guy love bombing you and you have no idea? Look out for these signs of love bombing. It’s important that you do because love bombing is often associated with narcissists and other manipulative types who use it to lure their victims into relationships. Here are some of the key signs to look for when dating someone new. If you experience any of them, the best advice is to beat a hasty retreat and end things. Love bombing is normally the first of many other manipulative techniques that ultimately destroy a person’s sense of normality, their self-esteem, and their self-worth. Don’t get love bombed. Be aware and be vigilant. And share this important information with others – the more people who are aware, the less luck a manipulator will have in finding a victim who falls for their tricks. Website: https://www.aconsciousrethink.com/ Relationship forum: https://forum.aconsciousrethink.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AConsciousRethink Recommended relationship counseling service: https://www.aconsciousrethink.com/RelationshipHero-YT Disclosure: this description contains affiliate links to select partners. We receive a commission should you choose to make a purchase after clicking on them. If you liked this video, I would truly appreciate it if you could hit the like button or comment (or both!) - it really helps us to get the word out and help people who need advice on their relationships. Thanks! And don't forget to subscribe to our channel if you haven't already. That way, you'll see more of our awesome videos in your feed.
View Video Transcript
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In the early stages of dating and during those initial weeks of a relationship
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there are certain signs to be aware of that might indicate the other person is trying to manipulate your feelings
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The broad term used to describe a variety of behaviour is love bombing. By understanding what it is, you'll be better equipped to spot a manipulative predator before you get too involved with them
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Hi, I'm Jessica from a conscious rethink and in this video we'll talk about love bombing and how you can spot it
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Let's start with a definition. What is love bombing? Love bombing is an attempt to accelerate the birth and growth of feelings within the victim
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by creating an intense atmosphere of affection and adoration. It is designed to disarm an individual's natural warning system
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so that it do not question the direction and the speed of a relationship is headed him
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It's sophisticated and over-the-top simulation of love by someone who is incapable of feeling love
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in those common sense of the word. Four emotional signs of love bombing
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Whilst we discussed some of the more specific signs of love bombing shortly, these four emotional signs are perhaps the most important to watch out for
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A manipulator will use a mix of these things to disarm a victim's defence and make them feel of deep level of commitment. Confusion
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Confusion occurs because of the sheer amount of communication that takes place between the couple
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This includes constant texting, frequent phone calls, interactions on social media and a strong wish to meet in person as often as possible
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It can feel overwhelming to be on the receiving end of such a bombardment. It is designed to convince the victim of the unique and special bond they have
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with the abuser. Having never experienced anything quite like it before, the victim will start to
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believe that this is something special, something good, a romance like you see in the movies. Flattery
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Flattery is present in virtually all courtship, but in the case of love bombing, it transcends
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to a whole other level. Every communication must include multiple compliments to seduce the victim
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and provide an irresistible feel-good factor. When the victim's constant here's how beautiful
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wonderful and perfect the other party thinks they are, it gives their ego a real boost and causes
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physical and chemical changes in their brains. These reinforce their attractions to the abuser
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Dependency. Dependency is something that the love bomber will often attempt to introduce just a few weeks
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into the process of dating. Despite being in this early stage, they were announced how sure they are of the relationship
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how much they enjoy spending time with the victim, and even how they are falling in love with them
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They push the victim out of their own feelings and attempt to have them reciprocate declarations of love and affection They do this to further confuse the victim about how they truly feel They start to devour more and more of the victim time and energy
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preventing them from seeing other people. This isolation may be noted by the friends and family of the victim
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but it's often waved away as mere passion by the victim themselves
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By controlling access to love and affection as an abuser, can make themselves in a position of great importance as contact with other diminishes
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Their new source of warmth and love available to the victim come from their newly found partner
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The longer this continues, the deeper under the spell they fall. Eventually, they start to see the abuser as someone they are unable to live without
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Destiny is how a manipulative abuser wishes to portray the relationship. Using phrases such as
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I've never felt this way about anyone before and I can't believe we found each other
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They paint a picture that this was meant to be. The victim is unable to truly access the value in these statements
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because they're so confused. They end up taking them at face. value and that only heightens their own feelings towards the other person. Eventually, they also
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begin to believe that their meeting was fate. They simply cannot relate their current experience
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to anything from the past. They think that this is true love. After all, what else could it be
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With these four emotional tools, an abuser is able to pack months worth of romantic bonding into a period
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of just weeks, they can accelerate the typical process of a relationship and skip the part where their
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victim would stand back and ask themselves, is this what they really want? Instead, because of how keen the love
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bomber comes across and how well they believe they have come to know them. The victim foregoes
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their reality check. Suddenly, and almost beyond the control of the victim, the abusive person
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has succeeded into turning the initial few dates into a serious, full-blooded, intensely physical
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and emotional relationship. Other signs of love bombing. We haven't mentioned some of the following
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things in passing already, but let's take a closer look at some of the clear indicators that
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a person's being loved bomb. Excessive gift giving. It's natural to feel a bit special and somewhat
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flatter than receiving a gift. It's a demonstration. It's a demonstration. of care and forerness. In the case of loving bombing, however, the gift giving goes beyond
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what you usually expect. Not only are gifts given in every in-person on the view, but they
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are also sent the victim's home or place of work on a near continual basis. The gifts are
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quite often more expensive and elaborate than as usual during the initial stages of a relationship
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huge bouquet of flowers, jury, even plain ticket, future faking. Under the umbrella of love
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bombing comes another tactic used by manipulators to accelerate the development of the victim It called Future Faking Future Faking is where a person offers detailed visions of what the future together might look like
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This might include discussions of all the great places they're going to take their victim. Exotic beach resorts, romantic city getaways, incredible restaurants, the lock
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It might also include talks of what type of house they're living together, what it will be
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the outdoor hopped up, the sweeping vistas of countryside, the his and her sinks, the walking wardrobe
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The manipulator might also tell you about all their friends or families members they wanted to introduce you to
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The main aim of future hy is to convince the victim that the abuse is committed to them
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It's all part of the act that convinces the victim that this must be destiny. It allows them to dream of this future together and how great it all sounds
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Non-stop compliments. Compliments in the context are not only incredibly frequent. They are often over the top in their praise of the victim
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They are designed to put the victim high up on a pedestal to inflate their self-esteem
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and make them feel nothing but positivity towards the manipulator. Some examples of the type of things they might say include
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you are the sweetest and kindness person I've ever met, or I could honestly stare in your eyes all day long
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or I've never met anyone quite like you before. Intense, one-sided personal sharing
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A manipulative person will want to know as much as they can about their victim in order to use that information for their own gain
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They want to know how to press their victims' buttons, how to get an emotional response using things from their victim's past
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They focused a great deal on the other person, in order to get to know them as best they can
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The victim may feel truly heard, more so than with other people they've ever dated
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but they won't realise the true reason why. The manipulator will dig for important nuggets of information
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by asking probing questions and getting the victim to open up, even beyond what they might be comfortable talking about
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The pushing of boundaries. It's natural to rub up against each other's boundaries when first dating someone
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It's how people learn about what is and is not acceptable. And in healthy relationship, those boundaries are respected
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once they are identified. But a manipulator won't pay much attention to their victim's boundaries
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They will continue to disrespect them or get very upset when their victim tries to assert those boundaries
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They will have excuses and reasons as to why the other person should drop their boundaries and accept the behaviour or request
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of their manipulator. They will try to reassure them that it's okay and that they can trust them
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even as the other person's telling them, no. They will make the victim feel guilty
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for resisting by making comments such as you would be okay with this if you really cared about me or this is what meant to have when two people are as perfect for each other as we are Refuse or to slow down If the victim makes any attempt to slow the relationship down
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the abuser will resist. Maybe the victim suggests a date several days into the future
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The abuser will see this as a problem because it gives the victim time to think and to gain clarity on the situation
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which risks the control they're trying to assert, so they insist on seeing them sooner, much sooner
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Or if the victim is being more reserved than usual with their text communication, The abuser will simply text more often and try to force the conversation
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although they will change the method of communication and called the victim out of the blue. The manipulator will insist on reaching ever bigger milestones as soon as possible
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such as meeting the victim's friends, going on vocations together, or even moving in together. Even marriage proposals are not out of the question
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Inconsistency in emotional expression. This sign comes a little later on in the love bombing process
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when the victim has been well and truly lured into the relationship, all of a sudden, where there was only one
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Once all duration, compliments and kindness, there is now irritation, anger and coldness
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The relationship will settle into a pattern of periods of love bombing, which becomes shorter
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over time, followed by periods of abuse or indifference which get longer
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How do you tell love bombing from true love? The primary difference is that true love is two-sided
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It feels right for both individuals, and there is a distinct lack of confusion present
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Even if things happen very quickly, it doesn't feel rushed. You don't feel rushed
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You are 100% consenting when it comes to the speed and level of the time
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commitment. So if you are utterly confused about how you feel, if you don't truly know the other
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person that well, and if you somehow find yourself being separate from your existing life
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friends and family, you're probably being love bombed. And if you believe that this is the case
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the only course of action is to leave the relationship and never return to it. That's all from me
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today. Hopefully the video has given you the knowledge you need to identify the signs of love bombing
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and distance yourself from an abuser before they are able to manipulate you into a relationship
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If you experienced love bombing and would like to share your thoughts or stories, leave a comment below
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And don't forget to like this video, subscribe to our channel and click that bell button to get notified of our latest content
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Bye
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