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GEM and Navina met when they ended up in the same house share, but soon realised they were more than friends. Gem told Love Don't Judge: "I was attracted to Navina very quickly." In the past, Navina has only dated men and Gem is the first woman that she's had a romantic relationship with. Navina explained: "I'm a trans woman and people judge my relationship because I was only with men prior, and now I'm with a woman." The pair receive lots of online hate over their relationship. "A lot of the stuff we post that's big is mainly us being vocal and trying to advocate for trans women being considered lesbians," Gem explained. Friends have also expressed concerns about the couple in the past and today, they'll be chatting with Rae to find out what she thinks about the relationship. Rae admitted: "I wasn't sure that Navina was serious about Gem. It did cause a sense of stress for me..."
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0:00
My name is Jem
0:01
My name is Navina. We're lesbians even though we have opposing parts. The judgment we receive in a relationship, it mostly comes from online
0:08
It's a lot of straight with extra steps. If you give Hot Dog BJ Handy's ETC, you're not a lesbian
0:16
I'm not sorry. What about me being attracted to her says that I'm attracted to men
0:20
The worst reaction I've personally had is a person threatening my life
0:26
We're going to have a talk with our friend Ray. And they were the reason that me and Naveena even met in the first place
0:31
I'm worried because you would bring a lot of people over. And I'm just, I'm scared we're going to cheat
0:37
So we'll need the flour, salt, cinnamon. Okay, let's get started. I'm a trans woman and people judge my relationship because I was only with men prior
0:48
And now I'm with a woman. I was attracted to Naveena very quickly after we first met
0:55
They wanted to kiss me and I wanted to kiss them back but they were in a relationship
1:01
And then when my relationship ended I think was when things started to progress
1:06
So we officially became a couple in March. Happy anniversary! It's pretty
1:14
We celebrate every single month that we are together. Your first time making French toast
1:18
First time making French toast. Look at that, okay. I'm so excited to try it. Oh my goodness
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goodness. I think that's some of the best French toast I've ever made. First time I considered
1:26
starting my transition, I was in middle school. I was 12, 13 years old. As part of my transition
1:33
I started taking hormones. About a year in, I started taking progesterone. My next step's
1:39
probably going to be surgeries, like top surgery, bottom surgery, facial feminization. You could
1:45
definitely tell in these photos with the like no expression. She was definitely sad. It very much
1:51
She's giving like performative and that's okay. Yeah. There's no life behind those eyes
1:57
No. Her life was not yet started. I was doing drag being a man
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That was gender performance. A hundred percent. The one of us kissing
2:08
Oh my God. I love that photo too. In my previous relationships I was only with men I was never in a relationship with a woman I had trans people coming in and out of my life but dating a trans person I think is different than just being friends with a trans person
2:23
I use the term lesbian because being a lesbian to me just means being attracted pretty much solely to femininity
2:32
I remember being a little kid, a little boy, saying, I'm a lesbian. And it turned out to be true
2:38
We're going to have a talk with our friend, Ray. We've been best friends since high school
2:42
and they were the reason that me and Naveena even met in the first place. Hi
2:47
It's so good to see you. You have snow in your hair. Oh my god, it's freezing out there
2:52
Oh yeah, get in, get in. I wasn't sure that Naveena was serious about Jim
2:57
With Jim, I was worried she was rushing into things because she had just gotten out of a relationship
3:03
So I was worried that both of them were kind of doing it a little too fast
3:07
It did cause a sense of stress for me at first. It came as a shock to me to see you guys together because I just didn't think you were even liked women like that
3:16
What are your concerns, girl? I'm worried because you would bring a lot of people over
3:22
A lot. And I'm just, I'm scared I'm going to cheat. Oh, me personally, I'm not a cheater
3:27
Don't put that on my name. I guess my question is what changed with Gem
3:32
Gem to me feels like the one. And that's the difference between them and everyone else
3:36
Everyone else kind of felt like I was getting ick. There was something wrong with them
3:40
and it's 11 months and I have not found something wrong with Jem
3:44
I'm starting to feel a little bit better about it. After you called me a f***. Oh, oh, oh, okay
3:49
I mean, we just never talked about it, you know? So for me, like, in my reservations
3:53
because, you know, I used to have feelings for Jem, so I'm just, I'm very protective. Yeah
3:57
You know, and I'm just worried. Well, you also have feelings for me. I did. Oh, I did
4:02
I had already kind of had feelings for Jem, and then I started developing feelings for Naveena as well
4:08
I was a little hurt. I'm sorry, bae. It's okay, I still love you
4:14
I thought you only liked men. I need the man to make me a woman
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That's what I believed. And that I could not be a woman by myself
4:21
without receiving that attention from a man. Now like celebrating 11 months
4:25
how do you feel about like being out in public? Like what do people say? What do they do
4:29
A lot of the judgment has came from friends Being a queer person you get to choose your family You really do You do not have to stick with the people who are blood Because sometimes water is thicker than blood
4:43
If a person treats you bad, why would you keep them around
4:48
Oh Lord, I look so short. We first started showing our relationship online, I believe in June
4:55
And from that point onwards, it kind of just blew up. A lot of the stuff that we post that goes big, mainly us being vocal and trying to advocate for trans women being considered lesbians and that they can be considered lesbians
5:09
The judgment we receive in our relationship, it mostly comes from online. It's a lot of straight with extra steps
5:15
I can't be considered a lesbian because I'm dating a trans woman. Just because of what's in my pants. Why do you care
5:21
If you give hot dog DJ Handys ETC, you're not a lesbian
5:26
I'm not, sorry. It's a lot of I can tell that you're trans
5:31
All those pizza huts that closed and became attorney offices or dental offices, you know it used to be a pizza hut
5:38
What about me being attracted to her so that I'm attracted to men? I know if I was like with like a man, like y'all would be respectful, but you're not because I'm with a woman or a trans woman
5:49
A lot of the hate comes from within our own communities. They believe that there's just one way to be a lesbian, which is, I think, very close-minded
5:59
The worst reaction I've personally had is a person threatening my life and me having to go back inside of my work
6:07
and get an escort so that I could leave because he was screaming for me to come out
6:13
A lot of the time, I get nervous. I don't really let her go out alone, and it's not in a creepy and possessive controlling way
6:19
It's more just like, maybe you shouldn't be out alone because I don't know what could happen to you
6:24
Someone could clock you. When people come at us, the first couple times you get it hurts
6:29
And then after that, you kind of like build up the armor and you're like, okay, give me something new
6:34
Because like everybody wants to hit me with the same thing over and over again
6:38
And it gets to a point where it's like, the reason we keep going is because representation matters
6:43
and there's so many people like us that deserve to be able to see themselves represented in everything Do you feel like your mind has maybe changed a little bit in terms of like our relationship Obviously you know feelings aren something that go away immediately
6:58
So I have to work on that internally. But I want to make sure that you guys really love each other
7:04
Yeah. Yeah. And you guys are really happy? Yes. Definitely. That's the most important thing to me
7:10
I'm glad to hear it. You're going to make me cry. Oh my God
7:14
Thank you guys so much for talking with me. I do feel a lot better
7:19
You do? I hope you feel better. I do love puberty. Oh, you feel so much both of you
7:24
There we go. The full heart circle. So today we are celebrating our 11th month anniversary
7:29
We're going to get some tattoos. Hi! Oh my goodness, it's so good to see you too
7:35
It's so good to see you too. I haven't seen you in a second. The tattoo that we're getting is going to be a woman love woman symbol
7:40
The two female symbols interlocking each other. Yeah, we can do it like right here
7:44
Okay, sounds good. Are you excited? I am. I'm a little nervous, but not too nervous
7:55
We are so happy with the tattoo. It is so perfect. She did an amazing job
7:59
Emma always does an amazing job. Always. Love her so much. What I love about Jem the absolute most is how much they care about other people
8:08
Being homeless and having someone be like, you can stay with me because I understand the situation and giving me a place to live
8:15
welcoming me with open arms is something I've never experienced and that is something that I
8:22
will never take for granted I think what I love most about Naveena is her ability to always be
8:29
as positive as I try to be she's been through probably more than I have and still remains so
8:35
positive you're just a joy to be around thank you of course I love you I love you I would say to
8:42
people that judge our relationship, do a deeper dive. Try to meet a trans person. Try to connect
8:48
with these people and get out of your ignorance because all ignorance toboggans into now
#Discrimination & Identity Relations
#Human Rights & Liberties
#Romance