The TRUTH About Men & Emotions Nobody Talks About 👀 | SWAY’S UNIVERSE

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if you don't mind I like to give this man a standing ovation while he's in our presence for the contributions to this
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community that he gives I've been watching this man since 2016 and I've been seeing him and watching him help
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transform people's lives I love that for a higher for a higher quality way of living and thinking and loving
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themselves and I want to say personally to him because I've been able to personally learn from your from your
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writings um Battle Cry um is a book that I read through and I I'll often watch
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you on Instagram and then go back to your literature and see how it aligns you know because you're a excellent
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teacher you're incredible oror you're very gentle uh you're very compassionate
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uh when it comes and you're very empathetic when it comes to men especially young black men and I think
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that is necessary I was telling you outside I wish I had someone like you or
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more people like you around me uh when I was growing up and so I want to say thank you man he's here to celebrate his
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book The Man the moment demands where he challenges and dismantles preconceived notions of masculinity and even reading
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through this book I want to uh go through an excerpt before I say his name Heather be okay all right and this is
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from a um a section in the book called Fight to love yourself and he said my
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father once share wise advice with me stop expecting someone to apologize for
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punching you in a metaphorical sense this Council uh this Council urges us to stop anticipating an apolog ology from
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people who intentionally wound us emotionally or verbally it implies that waiting for an apology or remorse from a
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wrongdoer might be both unrealistic and unproductive if someone says I'm sorry but doesn't change their behavior is not
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an apology apology they simply said psych these are the words from the one
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and only Jason Wilson man and I want to welcome him to the show The King Jason Wilson is here man finally glad to be
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here brother finally you made it yes sir minutes early this time I wasn't going to bring that up man
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it's all good you know I wasn't going to bring that up but um man welcome to the show brother glad to be here brother I
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I'm I'm curious um glad to have you I'm curious to um a couple of things but
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first I want to tap into your your love for hip-hop culture yeah and I'm not sure how often you speak about that but
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you know like me you know you you you found Foundation through the culture
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right yeah it was my way of finding identity you know when I grew up um didn't have my father around uh same
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city just wasn't actively in my life then my brother was murdered uh when I was young and then my entire Community I
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was in between two popular gangs in Detroit so I really didn't I had to make a decision whether I would follow either
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or carve my own path uhuh and thankfully I had enough friends who were in gangs were pushing me to do the right thing
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and I just happened to find my Niche DJ MH I started when I was in eighth grade with one turntable scratching sucker
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MC's what kind of turntable was it it was a belt drive uh Panasonic I think at
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the time then I got my first set of 1200s technique 1200s at 16 and um from
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there I didn't look back man and but hip hop gave me my own identity but what interesting though even in you know
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DJing in starting producing I still had a facade on I often say there's no freedom in the
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facade and in the hip-hop culture we even programmed to wear it even remember E40 song uh practice looking hard
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practice looking hard and then if you look at like all the classic hip-hop album covers no one ever show anything
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besides the the tough exterior we didn't smile a lot no and so but the problem with that is we were not being
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comprehensive as men so so many of us were still wearing masks even though we considered ourselves real you know and
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so I discovered later on in my journey from being around so many like guys who
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were really living that life that a thug was a traumatized human unable to grieve
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and I created that acronym because it didn't make sense to why someone could step on your shoe and next thing you
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know someone's going to shoot them because they stepped on their shoe or bumped into you so when we're taught to
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embrace trauma like it's a badge of honor instead of saying no wait a minute it's not normal for my children to hear
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gunshots at midnight we need to really reflect cuz now for some reason the
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culture The Hip Hop I grew up on it changed into something that promoted
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what we were against you know we were trying to uplift our community and I
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found myself on the other side of that being a hypocrite because I was producing songs that countered what God
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had placed in my heart wow like who did you produce for uh in Detroit I produced
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you know my group was chaos and Maestro I was a DJ Maestro back then but far as well known I produced for red man with
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Chris Weber he had a song with red man nothing to do you know that one
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I do yeah they did a couple joints because with r and Chris and different people Chris and his brother too um
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David Weber yes David yeah David he he sings actually I think yeah he used to sing rather wow yeah I don't know if he
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shared that but he did no he didn't share that but thank you he used to sing and then I did songs with uh corrupt as
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well he had became um actually very encouraging during the time when I was trying to make my transition out okay um
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the most high told me one day when I was making music he says you know it is a
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gift that you have but you need to be more responsible with it and when I decided to step away and corrup was like
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man why are you why are you stopping I said well yeah to you it may just be a beat but it's much deeper than that so
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the beat represents a gun your lyrics represents the bullets when they come together I'm destroying a mind and
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corrup was like wow that's deep and I had to make sure that I had the right bullets in this gun that what I was
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using this gift that God had given me that I wasn't using it to perpetuate
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something that was uh very detrimental to our community and so I love the culture I love the five elements just
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everything about it but at the same time I see so many hurting within the culture and that's what I believe I'm called to
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do now is like look yes you know we're more than just providers and protectors and Fighters All right but as men we're
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missing the deeper side of humanity and because of that we're struggling with suffering and silence even Drake says I
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pop bottles because I bottle my emotions so we missed that but this brother is literally saying I can't express myself
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so I'mma get high or drunk how many of us in that culture I used to drink 40s every day damn trying to repress the
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pain of my father not being there my brother being murdered my friends getting shot no one ever taught me how
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to process but instead I'm going to look hard 24/7 uh impervious to any emotion M
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and it made us so un hethy even now today as men we die almost four times as likely as women by Suicide we repress
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too much and we're actually admonished at times for being expressive or
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expressing The Human Side of us so we go into what I call emotional incarceration and now we we love suffering well we
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don't love it we think suffering and silence is a cold to honor but unfortunately men are aren't living full
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lives I'm living full lives yeah man what you speak of um we all I think as
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men if you grow up in a certain environment you know we come to these Crossroads that you're speaking of I
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often came to that Crossroad working in this business for so many decades and um sometimes I have artists whose music
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isn't the line with with my walk you know but at the same time I have empathy and sympathy for those men or women and
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so I want to bring them on the show and give them a chance to shine but I recall
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many times when uh my messaging was in that same direction you know trying to
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think trying to uh search ourselves from within instead of from outside and I had a lot of people around me close friends
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who had came up with me who um didn't really believe me you know what I mean
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like you made a transition in your life right yes and at that point you came to that Crossroad I'm wondering how many
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people didn't buy into your transition they didn't believe it I remember I remember when I first started
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just transitioning my boy shabaz who I used to produce music for he was all right I'm going to wait for you to get
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over that dog so when you you get over your Jesus thing your God thing and come back make them beats I'm here for you no
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one believed me because in our culture how many men do you see especially black men stand bold in their convictions and
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don't compromise so I was a gy in that era and so what was great though when I
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did walk that straight in there when I did say hey I'm with you I still love you I'm going to be here but I can't
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walk that path when you're ready come with me I never judged my my brothers
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who were still in Hip Hop what's deep is that they would still come to me for counsel so here it is on record you're
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hearing and you're seeing in videos someone completely different than this man young man breaking down to me in
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front in my basement and at the time I couldn't foresee what I had to do today
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it was probably too heavy for me then back then right yeah but a lot of rappers DM me reach out to me who real
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popular and so my voice is for them who can't really express it a lot of these
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guys are in positions where they have to make money they have to you know compromise but I'm saying you don't
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there is a way out you just have to fight for that and you have to learn you know what I what I and I'm using my own
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personal experiences when I speak on this you know uh when I first wanted to try to understand my emotions you know
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and my feelings and how to express them I didn't know how which is really
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frustrating and then I think that's when we go into our masculine shell right well I I don't want to be embarrassed
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I'm at a loss of words uh I don't even know how to correlate the words with what I'm feeling that's a process to
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learning how to communicate you got take action moments in this book right absolutely a lot of take action moments
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and when I read them I'm like man man I if I tried that I could have probably did a lot better in my communication yes
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sir how do you teach people to how do you teach teach men to communicate what it is that feeling first and foremost I
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model it you know so when men if I get a group of men of 50 in one room and they see me as transparent still strong again
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I've been trained in the martial arts tactically trained as well so they don't feel that man this is weak wait a minute
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this is no this is not weak this is comprehensive manhood when I model it they can see me transparent I may cry
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over something that's heavy I may uh express some trauma that I needed to release in that moment next thing you
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know is a chain action of men uh men expressing their pain no longer holding it back and they're able to transform I
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also love using practical examples in this book I use the crayon analogy where
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uh I compare men um our I guess usage of our emotions is like compared to the
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eight box eight crayon box then you got the 64 box of crayons that women have so
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the 64 box of crayons represents the gamut of emotions that we were all given
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regardless of your gender but yet women are used to expressing those as men we
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have the eight box of crayons of emotions and we probably only use three or four out of those anger frustration
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and maybe some fear as a result in communication and what you're talking about becoming a verbal processor when a
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woman expresses Violet all we have is purple when a woman expresses lime all
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we have is green and yellow and we get mad cuz she can't understand why we we can't create the color we're trying our
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best the thing is when you're not used to expressing the emotions we're taught to hide and you know from childhood Big
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Boys Don't Cry we're programmed Young no pain no gain that expressing any emotion
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outside of the masculine ones is a sign of weakness but it's actually a sign of Being Human the misleading Mantra Big
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Boys Don't Cry yeah actually Dr William Frey discovered he's a biochemist that tears not only contain 98% water but
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also stress hormones when they get excreted from the body which is why we feel better feel so great when we cry so
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it is when you tell boys to shut up you know be a man man up be quiet then you wonder why when he turns 13 or 20 he's
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not talking anymore he's angry he's now thinking of having suicidal ideations
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and he's unapproachable can't keep a job apathetic stuck in the basement that's
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why we've conditioned Men by a a lie that manhood only means doing instead of
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being and I tell Brothers you're not tired of living you're tired of not living and we have to get to the place
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instead of always complaining we have to now start fighting for the life that we desire and deserve the women what I love
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about them they refuse to allow the world to Define their worth uh my father
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would say my wife doesn't need a watch cuz there's a clock on the stove and and what was the misleading Mantra A Woman's
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Place was in the kitchen yeah women rebelled against that you know and other injustices that they had to face
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couldn't even have a bank account unless you're married but as men for some reason we settle for
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the grinding lifestyle we settle for just bringing the bacon home we settle for being called the Lesser half our
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wives being referred to as the better half we settle for the honeydew list you know I talk about there we need to also
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say the honey don't list I'm tired I need to rest how many of us as men when we want to take a nap we jump up when we
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hit a door of our girl coming in our wife coming in we pop up yeah because our lives are Performance Based and none
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of us are truly happy because we're not living in purpose but more so we're not fighting to feel and one of the worst
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things we can teach boys regardless of ethnicity is to teach them to be Fearless cuz no man is fearless everyone
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has something that they love that they don't want to lose without fear there is no courage for you to be courageous
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something has to be at risk for of you losing you're going to fear that that can happen then you move through it so
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we teach our boys in our Academy feel fear but don't succumb to it yeah so when you allow a boy to feel when you
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allow a boy to M uh allow a man to feel as well we become better leaders
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husbands Community servants Sons as well and that's all I'm offering I'm not
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telling Brothers to relinquish your masculinity or masculine attributes I
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want you to understand that word is just an adjective it's not a comprehensive
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definition of what it means to be a man his attributes tra traditionally ascribed to man is strength boldness and
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aggression that's it so if I'm a nurturer if I'm a coach does that mean I'm feminine no nurturing is not an
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exclusive characteristic to a woman it's also to men as well say that again
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nurturing nurturing is not an exclusive characteristic or attribute to women is
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us is ours as well the samurai were great warriors great Fighters but they
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also were comprehensive men they loved the cherry blossom tree they were farmers they love poetry theater but no
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one dare test their manhood M and so as men when you cut off that side when you
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only can uh live out or embody two characteristics of the 10 that I lay out in this book that's why life is
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miserable that's why you can't stay in a relationship because you can't stand your ground and say hey I don't have to
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yell at you but I'mma Express the offense that you did today and we're going to stay here and when I learned
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that skill brother now the arguing stops now the resentment and the yelling me
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hitting the table because my point wasn't uh respected or taken those
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childish behaviors I no longer do now that I became a comprehensive man I love this man Jason Wilson man I love it man
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I should have had you here sooner bro could have got did a couple of hours and then when I um I I I was reading through
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a section of the book that talked about fear of commitment right and um uh you
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talked about how the Bible doesn't mention girlfriends you know and so is when men
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get to a certain age it makes you laugh when they refer to their partner as girlfriend right absolutely and and so
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uh real quick I want you to express the importance cuz Heather speaks about you know partnership and M holy matrimony um
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a lot and you have an amazing wife uh who got honored with Michigan Chronicles 2025 woman of Excellence award we're
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talking about Nicole Wilson Nicole Nicole Nicole Wilson your part your your
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partner executive director of the Union she holds it down and so many of us miss
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that blessing because we think we should have everything together yes while before we get married so Nicole made
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more money than me when we got married it still didn't change my position in the home it didn't matter how much she
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made but I needed this woman to come along with me to create what you see today and so I tell Brothers don't uh
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allow what you don't have to stop you from getting what you can if you got a woman right there willing to work with
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you and help build something a kingdom together make it happen I often say Nicole and I got it together together
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and that's as men we need to work on that but again we got to go back to the facade or the Superman cape that's
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strangling us a good friend of mine once said when I was just talking with him about marriage and being transparent he
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was saying man my wife she can never see Bruce Wayne she can only see Batman and that's the another issue when I talk
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with men that keeps them from committing to a woman now the mass is gonna have to
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come off yeah you're not always stoic you're not always strong you're not always confident and so now she gets to
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see that you're human and because we're used to wearing the facade because we're used to wearing this cape that is now
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strangling us when it's time to really be human when it's time to drop the guard and be safe at home we can't and
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so we run from those relationships because we've been conditioned to believe that all we are is to do and I'm
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telling men it's time for us to be proud and just be and just be Jason Wilson is here man you ever have um
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setbacks you know what kind of setbacks do you have in on this path of just constantly bettering yourself we fall
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back man absolutely it's like you know I've worked out for a year then I fell off I gained everything back right so
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I'm just speaking metaphorically for sure right yeah saw a picture from from last year Jason he got upset I stopped
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looking at those pictures man just I'm a 55 this year so I just oh man welcome
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man come on man yes so thankfully for the training I'm able to stay in some shape but setbacks man they come with
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life you know and one of the biggest mistakes we can make is not believing that mistakes are our best teachers and
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so I tell our boys that you know don't allow uh a fear of failure to stop you
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from trying and so one of the principles I adhere to is always reconciling when
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I'm wrong I got to make it right that day uh a Biblical principle is Don't Let the Sun Go Down on your raft so with
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Nicole my children I can't tell you how many times I said man I wish I would have done this better with my son or my
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daughter and that's why I titled it the man the moment demands because I wrote it for so many men who are tired of
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being the wrong man in the moment and so when I do make those mistakes and when I do fall short I first pray and repent if
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it's needed like if I truly sinned against the most high for one by my actions but secondary I I give myself
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room to to to to fail and I sit with it for a moment I have a concept called the
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four RS reflect on what's troubling you release any tox any thoughts before they
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become toxic so that you can reset and rest so I do this in real time if I'm fighting I do it if I'm communicating
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with Nicole if she says something I release it so I can stay in the moment of the communication m so right now
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currently man just dealing with just being a father my son is graduating next
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year and wanting to spend more time and and train them amazing bro yeah but at the same time it's like as fathers
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especially black men you know if you didn't have your father in your life you catch yourself going way above and
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beyond trying to attain something that's not humanly possible what do you mean meaning if I could give my son 28 hours
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a day I would okay it's impossible POS some things that you just can't do and
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although it's it's commendable that we desire to be to our children what our fathers weren't to us at the same time
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we got to leave room for us and in the process of giving ourselves to our family and taking care of everyone we
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forget that we are part of that family too I love I love this man Jason man he
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I just like watching you talk brother it's like I'm watching you on Instagram right now and and and I want to give you
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this space um um to to talk about yourself your journey and and and and
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these these Revelations these ideas and philosophies and and and these these
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ways that you live I think it is very important for people to hear it and I love how you teach it I'm open up the
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phone lines 888 742 3345 the man the moment demands you have any questions
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and Men call up and women who trying to understand men call up 888 742 3345
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DB What's this called man that is red man and Chris Weber also known as C web
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produced by our very own guest Jason Wilson the song is called nothing to do man I got to give my my brother who
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co-produced that with me a shout out he's no longer with us an fitler okay uh he's actually the one who discovered Jay
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Diller discovered Jill he's the one who introduced he gave uh Q-tip a cassette
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of Jay Diller and that's how all that happened so it's name is a fer you Google him Legend producer keyboardist
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just phenomenal brother lost him recently um close friend of mine and he helped produce that song with did you
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ever work with Jay Diller not I didn't work with him but one day we were shopping for samples where I was and he
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pulls up one day and of course we knew each other being in Detroit and I had the honor to go record shopping with
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this brother and to learn a lot about sampling and and and chopping up Beats
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and everything and so he actually loved this song cuz heard it when it was being mixed uh so yeah J D was truly a
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phenomenal he tell you man what' he tell you one secret just he told me to I was trying to like go for a certain sound
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like a hardcore like I was at that time I was looking for hard rock samples to make like a hardcore like hip-hop track
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he said start like don't allow yourself just to to to research or be open to
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other sounds of Music don't get set into one style and so that day I picked up
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some folk uh Al albums uh more uh old school jazz as well and even I forgot
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this one uh sample um it was a Quincy Jones record when he was producing Jazz and we were listening
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to it together he says what are you hearing so I'm still locked on this [Music] heart that's what I wanted to create but
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then he found that same feeling in that jazz record and showed me that I could have the same Vibe well same like energy
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that I wanted with a different vibe and so J D didn't allow himself to be boxed into one style which is why I
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appreciated him as a producer but even more so that day and how do you make that a metaphor for Life H well it was
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interesting I'm looking at my brother's turntables over here brings back a lot of memories I remember all I used to do
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was spin hip hop in the 80s that was it yeah until one day I was at a backyard party and it was a girl I was eyeing the
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whole night you know I was waiting for my time to uh talk to her but she comes to the DJ booth and requests the song at
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the time brother all I had was hip-hop but she wanted house music uh-huh and I'm like yo all all I play is hip-hop
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you know what I mean and I proudly said that to her but she laughed and walked away and in that moment I realized like
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wait a minute I need to be more comprehensive as a DJ and also I had to
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for me to get the real money I couldn't get like the weddings and the big uh Cabaret because all I spun was hip-hop
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so I had to partner with DJs so I could have a set where I I'm the hip-hop DJ I would come in and just spend hip hop but
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I wasn't making the money and so the metaphor when I allowed myself to be
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more expressive like again you know I'm just trying to be hard you know but techno was founded in Detroit so I
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started spending techno became really good at spend the house I started making more money became one of the best DJs in
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my city and by me allowing myself to be more open made me a better DJ as well
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there you go you hear that Lonnie light Lonnie light's here he's our uh assistant PD uh producer right here AP
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right here you got a question Lonnie uh yeah I do Mr Wilson bless up to you what's up so like what would you say to
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male figures who are trying to reach the youth but that that don't listen you know and on the flip side of that what
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would you say to like young Brothers like myself that are trying to receive advice from our elders but they're kind
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of coming at us in a way that's hard to tolerate so the first question is how can if you're a mentor how can you reach
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Young boys who aren't listening yeah um the first thing I do brother is in the cave of a dullum when I have a boy who's
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rebellious or just angry and is resistant I make sure I'm on his level like eye contact is real important to me
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to let him know that you are the focus of this conversation so even if I have to drop down to my knees I'm locked in
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with them number two a lot of mentors feel that we don't treat the younger generation with the same respect we
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would treat a man so whether I'm dealing with a six-year-old a 10year old or a 16y old I'm treating
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him like I'm talking to grown men I would not yell at you Brothers try to demean you in any form no matter what's
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happening and so I make sure I respect them as a grown man secondly ask them
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questions instead of talking at them what are you feeling and give them the room to express it and when I do that
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now deep they often know their own answers you just got to give them the room to to express that and secondly for
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the younger men especially Millennial men who don't have mentors or sages in their lives and it seems like you're if
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you're resistant or they're talking to you the wrong way keep pursuing the men that you desire like I was talking with
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sway earlier you said how you wish that you had the cave of AD dullum or someone like me in your life growing up all I
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became was what I longed for I became literally that person that I wanted
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growing up so I'm saying to you is a lot of times yeah you may not have that male figure around but keep see speaking that
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but in the process live from the good in your heart live from what you desire to see that is good instead of complaining
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write those complaints down because you may be surprised that those complaints are something you supposed to solve so
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for me I was grieved at the state of black youth in my city um there was several scar straight programs and the
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boot camps you don't see those anymore because it didn't work okay how can you expect to heal a boy from trauma by ret
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traumatizing him and so that's when I created the cave of ad dullum it was a
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place in my heart something I longed for as a young man in martial arts at first it was all martial arts and then I
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realized the boys in my community what they needed it wasn't more discipline they needed more love they didn't they
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didn't need to be scared straight they needed to be healed so yeah when you train with us you going to learn how to Grapple you going to learn how to throw
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how to fall how to kick how to Elbo but at the same time you're going to know how to wage and win the wars that's
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inside of you yeah and so when you you when you seek that battle don't worry about everything that's outside of you
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uh when guys coming to me saying they want to learn how to fight I tell them immediately you cannot defend what
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hasn't been disciplined so you have to deal with your body if I'm in front of you and I throw a fake and you go for it
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I'mma knock you out with my right so you got to be still enough and being able to do that introspective work where you're
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not so much concerned about out here we all know sitting at this table as men we all got silent Wars going on inside of
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us right now but how many of us can sit still with that and deal with that and then find a therapist find someone you
29:03
can you can uh that can be a mentor to you and and and really face that battle
29:08
when you do that as a younger man when you become a man now you don't have to deal with so much trauma so again I
29:15
often say intergenerational trauma if that's POS if that can be passed down so can healing so I now say
29:21
intergenerational healing but it has to start with us there you go inter intergenerational healing I like that go
29:28
to these phone lines George is in Nashville George say hello to Mr Wilson Mr Wilson man it's a pleasure and
29:35
honor to get to speak with you sir how you doing my brother I'm good I'm good so I've been diving into your book it's
29:42
phenomenal like all of them have been and I had one question as I was reading
29:47
I started wondering like once you're a comprehensive man how do you lean into
29:53
those feelings that you're starting that are starting to come up because they
29:58
started coming at me so fast I thought I needed to up my testosterone
30:03
shot I was just like this is a
30:09
lot how do you I'm serious I
30:17
hardest all right man yeah for sure no I mean no one listen my brother one of my
30:22
longtime friends called me street guy you know what I mean and he's he was on his journey to comprehensive manhood he
30:29
started feeling these emotions that he had been suppressing for so many years he said Jay why am I crying dog over a
30:35
cartoon man yeah and I say I say I say my brother you backed up you need an
30:42
emotional inema you got years of emotions pain your friends got shot your
30:48
your cousin gets murdered you lost this you lost that and you've been holding all of that in so you're like a damn
30:53
ready to burst and so I I tell you right now brother give yourself some room to
30:59
grow allow yourself to grieve and release all of that so that you now will have the Capac the capacity to deal with
31:06
life in a more healthy way but no that's a real question for myself did you see the interview I did with B Simone
31:12
recently yeah yeah yeah brother I felt like I needed a testosterone shot after that but you know but but in that moment
31:21
the most high didn't need me to be this strong stoic brother in front of her he needed me to convey a message that she
31:27
is is loved she is not abandoned that she was hidden and being protected by him and that requires some tears that
31:34
requires some transparency and because I'm a comprehensive man I don't care about what people think if I'm crying or
31:40
emotional like what does it mean what are you going to do about it nothing I am not going back into emotional
31:46
incarceration and that's why it's important for you to do it for yourself first if you do it for anyone else when
31:53
you don't feel appreciated or they they they impassively dismiss your efforts you're going to go right back and so
31:59
what I say first and foremost allow yourself to grieve allow yourself to process and release so that you can
32:05
recover and secondly my brother do not do it for anyone else but you right now
32:10
they will benefit but make sure you're the main focus of it you got it no I I appreciate that my therapist
32:18
said when I met with her a couple weeks ago she was like you know you've been going through you've been living a
32:24
trauma of the south side of Chicago your whole life like used to accommodate to the GDs and accommodate to the black
32:31
stones and making sure your hats is straight and all these other stuff so long that you're doing it now in the
32:37
boardroom you're doing it now in meetings and it's not healthy for you to operate like that anymore so that
32:44
definitely Vibes with me for sure what you're saying and I appreciate you I'm proud of you brother keep it up brother
32:50
yeah I'm proud of you too George you don't need no the extra shot man you we don't need hey George hey George you
32:57
know what it it is brother we just need to be human man yeah man and do legs go work out the legs in the gym man
33:03
testosterone all right brother you're super morning all right bab keesha's on the Linea Keesha you got a question for
33:11
Mr Wilson Oh I have so many so many everybody in the studio okay I just
33:19
wanna hey Mr Wilson how are you I'm doing well how you doing I'm good I'm good I'm good I'm
33:26
just sitting here listening to all the stuff sometimes I feel like this pertains to me even though I'm a woman but they tell
33:31
me all the time I need to cry more but I don't um any who my question is so I've
33:38
been married um 16 years I think it's 17 this year been in love with this man
33:45
since 8th grade um with all his flaws and now we're in our 50s and I feel like
33:52
he still do the same things he did in high school and I'm trying to understand when I tried to sit down and talk to him
33:58
and not lose my temper and not be the crazy black woman um why I still can't
34:04
get no communication from him he shuts down he closed off he you know but he
34:12
out here doing the food on the regular so I'm just trying to understand how to be able to communicate better with this
34:17
man that's closed off and listening to you and I'm like yeah that sounds like him yeah that's probably what's going on
34:23
with him yeah but when you have a man that do not show emotion I've known this
34:28
man a long time and even when his father passed I think he cried away from me so I can't even say that I really have seen
34:35
him cry um and so I'm just I you know I'm just really lost right now I'm
34:40
almost feel like I'm drown and reaching for straws I'm I re books you know be Believers it it's it's so just listening
34:47
to you I just want your opinion about a man that is closed off and have a woman that's supportive and in his corner and
34:54
been here ride or die and just feel like it go I don't want to say unnoticed but unappreciated and just I'm feeling like
35:02
you know should I just give up walk away and just be like okay well I don't know what else to do with
35:07
this man well thank you first and foremost for sharing your heart and being transparent with what you're dealing with um especially on the public
35:15
platform um first you know I use myself as an example for you not to lose hope
35:20
um I was just like your husband I there were many days um I would sit on the couch depressed and not even know why
35:27
there were many days I would come home yelling and angry and had no idea what
35:33
was going on inside of me um I remember um just to be real with you how bad it
35:38
was when Nicole my wife lost uh our fifth child in a miscarriage I didn't
35:45
even cry I showed no emotion cuz I felt that that wasn't the man thing to do and
35:51
this was my daughter and it still gets me emotional even now that here it is
35:56
you know as men we're okay with seeing men cry when they win a Super Bowl trophy but a man is is like called a
36:07
weak or excuse my language a ho if he cries over his wife walking down the
36:12
aisle to make for him to marry her or me losing my daughter I felt that in that moment there's only one way and that's
36:19
to be strong and here it is I'm crushed and so I share that to say that your
36:24
husband he's emotionally incarcerated and he's had a lot of losses I don't even know him but I can tell you because
36:30
I know so many men like him he's been conditioned from childhood to repress
36:36
pain uh to stay strong uh we'll tell each other if someone mother's di someone mother has passed we'll give him
36:43
DB and say stay strong bro and this man's mother just died and so I I want
36:48
you to really understand what has happened to us as men in regards to the
36:54
programming that Society has done the music the culture everything and and I hope that will first and
37:00
foremost uh keep you empathetic towards him secondly I always advise this to women I I do it myself with my wife ask
37:08
him a time in his life where life was just felt like it was hopeless or he was
37:14
going through a lot of trauma and then ask him could he please send you a picture of him during that time A lot of
37:21
times what you're seeing you're not communicating with your husband you're communicating with the broken boy inside
37:26
of him uhhuh and so I keep a picture of my wife inside of my phone I look at
37:31
that whenever we have conflict because she shared that moment in her life that was very unstable and that keeps my
37:38
heart tender towards her and so when you find that picture and he gives it to you
37:43
let your the mother inside of you come out because he has a broken boy inside of him that hasn't been healed and then
37:50
lastly you know I don't know if you two have ever considered therapy of marriage counseling I strongly suggest that you
37:58
say you two are believers the scriptures say you know where there's abundance of counselors there is Victory so make sure
38:05
you and him uh uh take that path as well and you need to take care of yourself you know so many black women have had to
38:12
be strong for so many years that you're not crying anymore you're not releasing and I often say as black men if we ever
38:19
lose lose the black woman's empathy and compassion and love were done so I need
38:26
you to take care of yourself in this process as well and I got one more I often tell women send them one of my
38:33
videos on Instagram or something just say hey I just saw this video I thought this may be interesting to you and what
38:39
that does it often leads men down a trail that they desire to travel but have never seen and so just share it
38:47
with them don't say anything about it just send a video and say hey I think you should check this out this is kind of cool and then trust God will lead him
38:54
on the path to healing and
39:00
Kea gu way how you doing uh I'm good I
39:06
think this book yeah yeah give him the man the moment demands my new book will
39:11
take him through the process of becoming a comprehensive man so that he can deal with that trauma I have SE two exercises
39:18
in them that in in this book that will help him process what he's been through so it can finally be in front of him so
39:24
that he doesn't you know a lot of times as men we think we're the problem MH we're always wrong but no it's what
39:30
we've been through and so I believe this book will help them okay well kha make
39:35
sure you try that book and stay in tune with us and make sure you follow follow Jason Wilson because I'm sure if you
39:41
would to DM him he'll respond to you and mention us right right J DMs I get a lot so my sister you can
39:50
contact me through my website Mr Jason wilson.com you know how the DM sometime
39:55
they you don't see them all oh yeah right so something as sensitive as this I rather if you could just go to my
40:01
website okay okay here for you Kea and I'm praying for you kha I'll be praying
40:07
all right hey thank you I need it I need it and I'll be in the bay this weekend kha we we're doing our um audition I
40:14
won't be there but I'mma Be there okay not that but I'll be there on I'm coming to the track meet you coming to the
40:20
track meet okay we're doing a track me March 15th at Tracy High my family is sponsoring the U five north invitation
40:28
Ouran is top speed Athletics and experiences and I got some surprise
40:33
guesta that I'm working on coming to that track me so we we already got over 35 teams registered over thousand
40:40
students that are going to be running beautiful and like you Mr Wilson we want
40:45
to um really promote you know uh being fortitude mind body and spirit through
40:52
the discipline of tracking field so you you what you do in martial arts probably not as extens but I'm inspired by what
40:58
you do through martial arts cuz I grew up running track and field oh man you got a lot of principles in track and
41:04
field oh man for Life come on you already know brother let me know if you want me to come out that's what I'm
41:09
about that's why I threw it out there all right okaya you're a citizen Kea all right in the morning all right uh that's why I threw
41:16
it out there we connected now brother don't worry I got you we will be asked all I'm there I'll be there my man have
41:23
the be you want to ask a question I do because um kha is on my spirit and and
41:29
I'm just being honest because if you're not a Kesha today maybe you you've been
41:34
a Kesha or how do you not become that in a sense where you can be dating someone
41:41
right and you don't you don't know that this person or they're very good at hiding all of these things I don't know
41:48
that you're emotionally incarcerated or if I kind of get this sense I'm thinking
41:53
it'll go away you know this is this is not permanent but then you wake up 16
41:59
years of marriage you know and it's a real thing to me when she said I don't know whether to stay and just bail but
42:07
at some point as a woman it has to take a toll on you as well because you you're also dealing with your own things
42:14
internally and then you take this on um I want to start with the dating process
42:19
if you can how how do you know possibly when it's some Flags how long is too long I had a a friend been told after 12
42:26
years of dating some one I shared this with sway he broke it off with her after 12 years of living together and said I
42:33
realize that you're a good girlfriend but you'll never make it as my wife and I just kept saying to her 12 years
42:41
though like you didn't know anything when when were the flags you know so are men good at hiding these are we good as
42:48
people hiding how can you tell early on it's twofold all right for one as
42:56
soon as you become intimate with that man you're blinded that's why it's important that
43:02
you don't be stop giving boyfriends what your husband deserves all right and so when you allow
43:10
your Fortress to be penetrated now this man pretty much is
43:15
all in your head yeah you can't see anymore so I would start right there stop giving boys what your husband
43:22
deserves stop like Nicole when I met her she would never we could never live
43:27
that was like that's not going to happen and majority of our problems came from
43:33
because we got intimate before God could even build the Friendship before God could even work out anything in us so
43:39
when you bring those emotions in now it makes it harder for you to break away both men and women um what I tell women
43:47
what I love about this book actually a few women had told me they use this book now so they can understand what a
43:53
comprehensive man looks like you can see it from the door mhm uh when I wasn't
43:59
one I wore the facade I could hide it but eventually if you're staying with someone you see it but it's your fear of
44:06
Letting Go that stops you from leaving or doing something about it and so that comes from a lack of self-love or
44:12
selfworth and when you don't have that you start settling and next thing you know this six months of dating turns
44:19
into two years to five years yeah Nicole had to give me an ultimatum she gave me
44:24
back the engagement ring and said when you ready to marry me then we can talk so you got to make that stand for
44:30
yourself as a woman but you it the key thing if you you have don't give these
44:36
boys and I'm not talking about little boys but men who aren't males who aren't comprehensive men stop giving them that
44:44
access same thing with our brothers these women you got to understand
44:49
that you're part of the treat too brother you know what I mean it's like we think that being intimate with them
44:56
is is only like beneficial to us it's beneficial to them too as well I need
45:02
you to start like valuing yourself more valuing yourself more than what you do
45:08
and if you led by your penis you can never really walk in your purpose and it will always lead us astray and so many
45:15
brothers fall down that path as well and so again it's twofold and we both have
45:21
to understand as soon as we allow someone into that space we're more vulnerable that's the correct sense of
45:28
that word yes yes thank you yeah you're welcome give this man a round of applause man Mr Jason Wilson is here uh
45:35
and the book is the man the moment demands Master the 10 characteristics of
45:41
the comprehensive man it's an Incredible Book it's a easy read um easy to comprehend you give a
45:49
lot of basic examples that I think is uh great food easy to easy to digest um um
45:57
and I want to thank you man your your Works have helped me out in many ways thank you brother that means a lot and
46:03
uh thank you for inviting me here and um again I look forward to partnering with you with your your track uh track me
46:09
track me that's March 15th it's March 15th yeah but if listen we got more coming don't worry
46:16
okay yo Jason my man already knew I had something you didn't tell
46:21
me that's what J that's what he does though that's this is how he he wiggles you in work now now this is real
46:28
important for us especially all of us in here especially you brother yes when I learned how to say
46:35
no it it it helped me to live more you say anything thing with him yeah go
46:40
to you got to learn no is is not an attack on you uhhuh it's just not now
46:48
you know what I mean and so I'm real quick to saying that because at one point I was a slave to what everyone was
46:54
calling me to do instead of the most High's calling yes and I was pulled away in all these directions frustrated angry
47:00
no patience at home until I start saying no not now I can't do it right now but
47:05
maybe later and so especially for men like yourself who's highly sought after
47:11
you know radio the influence Everyone is always pulling at you you got to make sure you live what I call the imbalanced
47:17
life and I I guess close with this so many of us are taught to live the Balanced Life yeah when you do that
47:24
nothing truly takes priority so if you have your family the most high here and all your endeavors here and it stays
47:31
balanced your energy is dispersed to both of them for me I teach to live an imbalanced life where one side always
47:38
tips the scale when my life is balanced my family is neglected my mission is
47:44
neglected and my worship with the most high is neglected I always have that scale tipped everything else will work
47:51
out as long as this one is being taken care of there you go all right man I appreciate you man know
47:58
stop giving out torch's number s that's how he that's his he he passes
48:05
it off the torch that's I want to see everybody win torch that's who you been commun that's
48:10
why you point to him you know huh get him well this is one of many
48:17
conversations I hope we have okay I'm I'm honored to come back man uh appreciate you again reaching out and
48:24
giving me an opportunity to give a liberating message to me who are suffering and ready to break free and we
48:29
appreciate you and your service brother stay the course you got allies know that you got allies and and I'm available for
48:36
you as well appreciate it brother okay cool give it up for Jason Wilson citizens all right

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