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Thanks to heavy metal bands and Marvel movies featuring The Mighty Thor, most people have some basic knowledge of Norse mythology. But if you take the time to dive into it, Norse mythology is stranger and way more brutal than any metal album… or any Disney movie, for that matter.
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Thanks to heavy metal bands and Marvel movies featuring the mighty Thor
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most people have some basic knowledge of Norse mythology. But if you take the time to dive into it
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Norse mythology is stranger and way more brutal than any metal album
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or any Disney movie, for that matter. So, today we're going to take a look at the most violent stories from Norse mythology
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Now, brace yourselves, because there's Norse business like Viking business. In the beginning, there was the icy realm of Nivelheim and the fiery land of Musbelheimr
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When the haims collided, water was created, and out of that water formed the body of Ymir
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the father of giants and first being in the universe. If that sounds like a weird way to be born, allow us to continue
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Ymir then produced giants from his own body, and the cow, Audhumla
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lit river rocks into the shape of men. These men would become the first gods and they would father Odin
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Odin and his brother slew Ymir and threw his body into the void
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which sounds like a pretty crappy thing to do. But from his remains, they fashioned the entire world
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The clouds, for example, were made from his brains. Basically, every time Vikings look up at the sky, they saw the backseat from Pulp Fiction
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Havingus and Hargreper had a relationship as unusual as their names. Hearthgraper was a giantess who nursed the human, Hathingus, when he was just a child
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As he grew up, Hearthgraper offered to shrink herself down for him so they could be together
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which had to have been weird after babysitting him for years. But Hathingus embraced this, and the two traveled together
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Sounds like a lovely fairy tale, right? Well, one day, Hearthgraper saved Hathingus from an assault by a mysterious giant hand
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Reambiguring herself, she grappled with the hand, so Háðinglís could chop it apart
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But in doing so, she went against her own kind. So a group of giants arrived and tore her apart
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Jeez, it seems like they could have just revoked her membership. In Norse mythology, Yggdrasil, the world's tree
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binds the nine realms together. And its destruction is the final goal of Ragnarok
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It also promises knowledge to those who seek it. So naturally, Othyn, a guy who was big into knowledge, went to its roots seeking Mimir
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a shadowy figure who understood the flow of time, roughly ogous to the fates in Greek mythology
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Mimir guarded the well of fate, which is also what you call the punch bowl at a house party
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Othyn wanted to drink from the well because it would give him knowledge of events to come In some tellings he is specifically seeking knowledge of Ragnarok But because he was apparently really into irony Mimir demanded Ullin sacrifice his eye in exchange for the vision he wanted
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Ullin tore his eyeball out of his own skull and tossed it into the water
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Mimir then awkwardly explained he was only kidding, and they both had a good laugh about it later
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Probably. The Norse gods are divided into two tribes, Asir and Vanir
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Most of the time, the distinction didn't really matter. But every once in a while, they behaved like rival sports teams
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if rival sports teams literally tried to kill each other. So, soccer teams
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Hroja, one of the Vanir, was a goddess and a witch. Her magic was powerful, but she was kind of a jerk
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traveling from town to town and granting wishes with sinister consequences, monkey's paw style
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When she came to Oskarthor, the Asir were only too happy to use her services
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But as soon as they realized her gifts came with a price, they blamed her for their own selfishness and attempted to burn her alive
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It, uh, didn't work. The Asir tried a few more times, oh, then bless him
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But each time, Troja was reborn from the ashes. Predictably, this event led to increased tensions between the Asir and Vanir
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which eventually erupted into all-out conflict. The clash between the Asir and Vanir went on forever
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Even the combatants eventually got bored, so they called a truce and sent hostages to live with the other side to enforce good behavior
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Think Theon in Game of Thrones. Poor, dumb Theon. The Vanir received Honir and the oracle Mimir
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By finding out the future from Mimir, Honir was able to give his captors great advice
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But if they asked him stuff when Mimir wasn't around, he'd give vague, noncommittal answers
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That frustrated the Vanir. So they cut Mimir's head off and sent it to Odin to show their dissatisfaction
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Message received. Odin, realizing the Vanir had mistakenly killed the real seer
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magically kept Mimir's head alive and continued to seek counsel long afterward
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So it all worked out, sort of. The endless clashes between the gods and giants
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were occasionally interrupted by brief interludes of peace. In one such break, Thor was visiting the giant Hymir
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Thor's hunger was legendary, and he was going to clean his host out
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Thus, Hymir told Thor they needed to go fishing for more food
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The following day, the two struck out deep into open water. Hymir became nervous
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As in such deep waters, it was possible to run into the world serpent called Jormungandr
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which had venomous teeth and was known to down entire ships But Thor wasn about to let that ruin a good fishing trip At one point while Thor hooked something massive and using every ounce of his mythical strength
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he hauled up none other than Jormungandr. A terrified Humir cut the line before Thor could fight his ancient enemy
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which was a really bad idea. Never get between Thor and a good brawl
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Thor tossed Humir into the sea, presumably leaving the giant to be devoured
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and no one ever invited Thor on a fishing trip again. One night, Baldur, son of Odin and Frigga
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had a nightmare about his own impending demise. Not about to let anything happen to her baby
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Frigga visited every person, place, and thing in the universe, making them all swear not to hurt him
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As incredible as it sounds, everything in the universe agreed to this
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except for a young sprig of mistletoe, who Frigga thought was too young to ask
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In the movies, this is called foreshadowing. Thinking that Baldr was now invulnerable
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the gods took turns jokingly trying to slay him, like your friends would do if you suddenly became indestructible
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Until Loki gave the blind archer Hothr a sprig of mistletoe and told him to shoot it at Baldr
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You'd think everyone would know not to listen to the trickster god, but hey, it was a party
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Hothr, unaware of the danger, fired and killed Baldr. Odin was particularly upset about the whole thing, not just because Baldr was his son
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but because Baldr's demise was one of the early warnings that Ragnarok, the end of days, was coming
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After Loki caused the death of Baldr, the other gods tracked him down and brought him to a cave
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Then they found Loki's two sons, Vali and Nalvi, and turned Vali into a ravenous wolf
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that tore his brother Lin from Lin. After taking Nodithi's organs, they cast a spell to make the parts as hard as iron
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using them to bind Loki in the cave. In other words, everyone finally had enough of Loki's bullshit
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Then Skadi, goddess of the moon, caught a venomous snake and tied it above Loki so that the creature dripped venom on the god for all eternity
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To protect him, Loki's wife, Sigun, sat with him, holding a dish that caught the drops
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This is the Norse explanation for earthquakes. Every time Sigrun empties the dish, some venom drips on Loki
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causing him to shake uncontrollably and set off earthquakes. Heimdall, the dutiful watchman of the gods and a major character on HBO's The Wire
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is a busy dude during Ragnarok. First, he sees the approach of the giants and blows the Gjallarhorn
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alerting the other gods of what is coming Then as the giants storm across the bridge to Oskarthra Heimdall battles Loki The two are ancient enemies and they represent opposite Norse attitudes Loki with his anarchic sense of
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mischief, appealed to many Vikings. So did Heimdall, with his sense of duty and honor. As they fight
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the giants destroy Oskarthr and plunge the world into the sea. Meanwhile, Loki and Heimdall destroy
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each other, like the end of The Professional. Thor is the strongest, most popular, and best looking of the gods
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And while the movies pit him against his brother Loki, in the myths, his biggest enemy is Jormungandr, the world serpent
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Jormungandr is one of Loki's three children with a giantess, the other two being Fenrir, the Odin-eating wolf, and the death goddess, Hel
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Theirs was not a quiet household. During Ragnarok, Thor and Jormungandr duke it out one last time
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The clash is legendary. But at the end of it, Thor slays the world's servant
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But not before he receives a massive dose of venom that takes him down, too
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It may sound tragic, but remember that a happy ending for Vikings is one where everyone dies, looking really cool
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And it is hard to look cooler than this. If Vikings were particularly brave during active conflict and perished on the front lines
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they ascend to Valhalla and become one of Odin's Einharjär, or chosen warriors
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These Einharjär lead a simple life in Valhalla, but paradise for Vikings probably doesn't look the way you're picturing
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According to the poetic Edda, all the Einharjär in Odin's fields hack each other each day
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They choose slaughter and ride from the field, later sit reconciled together
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These chosen warriors carry out Odin's will in the world, fighting all manner of creatures
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But when there are no enemies to fight, Odin pits them against each other. Because if you're a Viking
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heaven is getting to spend eternity killing your buddies every day and getting resurrected in time to go drinking every night
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Much like a film by Zack Snyder, there are a few different versions of the Ragnarok story
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In some tellings, it's all over when the world tree, Yggdrasil, burns
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In others, however, Yggdrasil remains intact and shelters two unlikely survivors in its branches
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In this version, a woman named Liv and a man, Liv Thrasir
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hide in Yggdrasil during Ragnarok. They remain hidden during the entire conflict
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and survive by drinking dew from the leaves. After the sun is gone and all life gets extinguished
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they emerge into a new world with a new sun in the sky. The plants grow and the survivors start to have children
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to repopulate the new earth. So it's kind of like a cut with a bleak ending
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and a cut with a happy ending. and thanks to Netflix's Twilight of the Gods
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we're even getting a Snyder cut