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Pet advice from the Middle Ages isn't exactly like pet advice from today. Sure, you have your diet tips and expectations for obedience, but there's also a smattering of Latin incantations, unusual remedies, and enough superstition to fill a great dane. Erin breaks down that and more as she discussed medieval pet advice in this episode of The List Show.
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22 Pieces of Medieval Pet Advice | Mental Floss
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0:00
Long before the days of designer dogs, people had some unusual methods of creating a pocket-sized
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pet. One 15th century manuscript suggests a breeder soak some bread in water they'd
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previously washed their hands with. They should then feed that soggy bread to the puppies
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they've bred. Doing this supposedly ensured a dog would not grow any bigger than a person's hand
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Hi, I'm Erin McCarthy, editor-in-chief of MentalFloss.com, and welcome to The List Show
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This soggy bread tip is just the first bit of unusual advice for medieval pet owners that
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I'm going to share with you today. A couple of disclaimers up front
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Most of these tips come with a big do not try this at home attached to them
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And when I say pets, keep in mind that in the Middle Ages, most animals had a purpose
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Even creatures we'd typically think of as pets today, like cats and dogs, had jobs to do
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Cats were meant to catch mice and keep homes rodent-free, and dogs could be trained for
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a range of jobs, to an even greater extent than they are today, from tracking and hunting
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prey to guarding flocks of sheep. During this time, having a pet for pure pleasure was a
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luxury only the elite could afford to enjoy. If a medieval person was going to have a pampered house pet, they had better be a woman or a
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member of the clergy. Pets were particularly common among aristocratic ladies. Wealthy
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women kept everything from little white lapdogs to exotic birds to monkeys and even squirrels
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Unlike beasts of burden, the main purpose of these animals was to entertain and provide
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companionship. They were also kept inside. The outdoors, you see, was the domain of men
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Because clerics spent much of their time indoors, they too could own pets. A woman's lapdog may not be good for hunting or any sort of actual labor
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but they could serve one interesting purpose. One bit of medieval medical advice basically
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suggested using a small dog as a heating pad by pressing it against the body to deal with pain
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and sickness. If someone really wanted to show off their wealth, they'd get their pet some fancy
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accessories. In the Middle Ages, wealthy women adorned their pet dogs and squirrels with delicate
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collars made from gold, silver, or fine leather, adorned with jewels. Figuring out the value of a pet itself wasn't as straightforward as purchasing an accessory
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According to the Coetlochta a medieval Irish legal document about felines a cat that could both purr and hunt mice was worth three cows If a cat was on the lazier side and preferred to just sit around purring rather than hunting mice it was only worth one and a half cows A kitten meanwhile was only worth one ninth of its mother value
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until it was weaned. 10th century Welsh king Howell Tha had a different set of rules for
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assessing a pet's value. Kittens were worth one penny until they opened their eyes, two pence once
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their eyes opened, and four pence once they started hunting. According to a medieval German law
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if someone killed an adult cat, they had to pay its owner 60 bushels of grain. Dogs, on the other
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hand, were priced based on their owner's status. A king's pet dog could fetch a pound, whereas a
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serf's pup was worth a mere four pence. Medieval men could keep animals, but they were used for
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hunting or sport. Think falconry birds, hunting dogs, and fancy horses. Though these animals were
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valuable, they weren't spoiled the way house pets were. Guys liked to have animals that reflected
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certain desirable personality traits. They wanted creatures that were strong, fierce, and loyal
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not something frivolous like a fluffy dog or a squawking parrot. Their animals were kept outdoors
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and were taken care of by hired help. Rather than sleep on a luxurious pillow like an indoor pet
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hunting dogs were to sleep in wooden kennels filled with fresh straw and clean water
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Medieval pet dogs were basically fed like a picky toddler. They dined on meat, milk
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bread, and sometimes a bit of porridge. Bread, usually made from wheat, was a big part of a pet
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dog's diet back then. That may seem like an odd choice, but remember that a lot of modern dog food
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includes grains like wheat, too. There was some controversy around these dog diets, though
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Some people felt that the dog's daily feasts of bread, milk, and meat should have gone to
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less fortunate people, who weren't able to afford such fare. The Distaff Gospels, a collection of
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old wives' tales from the Middle Ages, says to keep a dog from barking, a person should feed it
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a nice hunk of roasted cheese while uttering the phrase, In Camo et Fretno et Keterah, a shortened version of a biblical psalm that, in translation
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reads something like, with bit and bridle bind fast their jaws who come not near to thee
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According to 15th century etiquette rules, a person should not make a dog thy fellow at the table round
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Translation, no dogs in the dining hall. And no feeding a pet from a person's own dinner plate either
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There were also guidelines about when to feed a pet. In the winter dogs should only be fed at sunset to keep them fit for the next morning hunt But in the warmer months they should get multiple small meals per day It was unwise to feed animals too much then as now though maybe for different reasons
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People often viewed a fat pet as a bad reflection of its owner's values, as it showed that they
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cared more for their pets than for the poor. Albertus Magnus, writing in the 13th century, warned of the dangers of overfeeding a pet
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saying that it was often ladies who spoiled their beloved little dogs
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According to Magnus, these porky pups were prone to constipation because of their rich diets
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He advised feeding them a porridge of oatmeal and warm water, or leavened softbread and milk
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whey, to get things moving. A dog that's too thin, on the other hand, should be fed a lot of butter to fatten it up
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Speaking of pampering, a pet owner had to be careful with their affection
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The amount of time a medieval person would spend petting their animal depended on the species
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Like modern cats, medieval cats demanded attention. Albertus Magnus wrote, quote, This animal loves to be lightly stroked by human hands, and also noted that they can be quite playful
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Etiquette books in the 15th century claimed it was poor manners to pet a cat or dog during meals
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People were also advised not to pet their dogs due to a fear that they would lose their tracking ability
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if they were motivated to seek out the people they like. In medieval Europe, it was also a bad look for men to be overly affectionate with their animals
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In Islamic countries, however, owners were encouraged to regularly pet their hunting dogs
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They were advised to comb their fur with a soothing material like silk. and to stroke, scratch, and touch the dogs daily
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But just because European dog owners couldn't be overly affectionate with their animals doesn't mean they couldn't be kind
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In the 14th century, Gaston Phoebus, the Count of Foy, basically wrote the book on medieval hunting
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When it came to training hunting dogs, he believed in the power of positive reinforcement
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According to Phoebus, a hunter should address his canine companion as brother or friend
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And if a dog failed to follow its master's command, the handler, not the pup, was to
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blame for the miscommunication. And though it wasn't considered particularly manly to have a cat, men were still advised
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to appreciate them. According to the Distaff Gospels, quote, Young men should not hate cats, because they are the cause of great happiness and can assist
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in achieving success in matters of love with young and charming ladies
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Veterinary advice for medieval pet owners was pretty dubious by today standards Albertus Magnus wrote that if your dog has worms in its wound you should treat it with wild tansy juice To mend a swollen limb apply a compress of ground marshmallow and water
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The Distaff Gospels suggest letting a dog that has been exposed to rabies drink from
6:48
a trivet, which would somehow magically protect them from the disease. The medical advice for owners injured by their pets was a bit iffy as well
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If someone got bitten by their pet monkey, they were told to put a blend of crushed salt
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onions, and honey on the wound. Maybe I'm wrong, but dowsing a wound with honey seems like pretty tempting monkey bait
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Speaking of being injured by an animal, a medieval person had to be careful if they were near a hunting cat
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If they got scratched, bitten, or otherwise injured by a cat that was in pursuit of a mouse and wanted retribution, they were out of luck
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According to the Kotlokta, a cat is not liable if it happens to hurt someone who quote, had
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no business being there, while it was hunting a rodent. Cats, being cats, often like to wander
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The Distaff Gospels offered medieval cat owners some pretty odd advice on how to keep their
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felines from straying too far. A person must turn the cat three times around a pothook, then rub its leg against their
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chimney wall. If they do that, the cat will never leave. If that solution didn't appeal to the owner, they could slather the cat's legs with butter
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for three nights to make them stay put. The Distaff Gospels also advised people to use their cats as a weatherman
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Or you know, weather cat. According to an account documented in the manuscript, if a cat is sitting in the window
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licking its behind and rubbing its ear, that means a person should hold off on doing laundry
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because rain is coming. To keep a male cat from strangling its owner, which was apparently something they were said
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to think about night and day once they turned four years old, a person should cut off a
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chunk of tail the size of their palm. Not okay. And if a person's cat was more of a thief than a murderer, they should rub its nose
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three times in what it has damaged, to prevent it from stealing again. We'll leave you with this pretty gross morsel of advice from the Distaff Gospels. If a woman
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wants her husband to learn to like her family and friends, she'll need to use their dog's
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urine. When said friends and family members visit with their dog, a woman should collect
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Fido's pee, then secretly put it in her husband's beer or soup. Once the man has drunk the urine-spiked
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beverage, he'll become friendly with both the dog and the people who own it
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