Maria Bamford on showbiz and 'Paralyzed by Hope'

They talk in the documentary about how it seems like you're always on the verge of breaking through or something

Which is ridiculous! Like, I know I've broken through. I'm done. You know what I'm saying

Like, I've made it in show business. I've watched your comedy since I was, like, a kid

Right. I'm 55 years old and counting. You can see every year on my body

I'm curious because you've been in comedy for so long. Yes. Why is it now the moment you want to tell your story in a documentary

Well, I mean, not to blame, but Judd said he was interested

I've told my story a billion times. Yeah. Don't need it. You have a memoir in your stand-up over and over

Yeah, over and over. Don't need to. Really, what it was was job creation for me

this carcass, as long as I can get some eyes on it

and get paid, that's something. Don't know if you want to take part in making a documentary

but regardless, you wanted money for Chudet. Yes! I don't know if that's how it works

but maybe we have no ethics here. What? I love Chud Apatow

I mean, I don't know if you've ever met him. Briefly. But he's charming and funny and fun as all get out

And he does a billion things for comedy, about comedy. He does comedy himself

He's doing four films. Like, unbelievable amount of energy and passion for these things

So it's like I feel honored and delighted to be in sort of a, I mean, I guess it's sort of a collaboration of the idea of following me

I just thought, but it's part of the documentary is talking about me trying to get paid to do the documentary

Because I've heard they've said, oh, that's not a thing. It's illegal or whatever, not looked upon well to get paid

But as an entertainer and a shy person, no, man, I don't want people watching me

I mean, I did. I think when I was a younger lady, I was like, put, oh my God, get some eyes on this

But now I'm, I'm less interested and, uh, so it needs to be renumerated

Do you, do people talk about that in your industry and pay

Um, well, yeah, we don't like pay for interviews. Uh, so sorry, I did not bring cash

No, no, no. Well, in some podcasts do pay, they definitely say to pay or they give you waters, uh, which

you just gave me. This water, I did not pay for. It's like a $3 water on the market if

you're going to go out and try to get one in the wild. But I got one free

Yeah, that's where we really come in clutch is we can give you fancy waters. We're pretty

good at that. Even in our New York studio, we got fancy water on tap. Yeah. No, and that makes a huge difference. I'm so grateful when somebody hands me a t-shirt

A bit of merch. Yeah. A pin. Within your comedy specials, you have a lot of say over that narrative and how you're choosing to present yourself

Oh, yeah. Everything. Yeah. Everything. Yeah. And then it's like when you're trusting somebody, even in a collaboration, to be like, here's my story

Like, that must be really good. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, at least I think as you get older, I think what I've been able to tell from my other friends who are getting older

you start to care a lot less. Yeah. Do you remember the movie Meatballs

Yes. It just doesn't matter. It just doesn't matter. The junket structure is just so brutal

I don't know how often you have to do junkets. I've never done a good junket, but I just did one with Judd for just one day at Sundance

It was insane. Yeah. It was like 12 hours long. And he had a new story and a new joke for every single junket

That is an incredible skill. I'm doing a film festival in, what's the fancy place

Martha's been there. And they said, oh, we're going there with the documentary

And there's no way in hell I'm going there unless you're going to give me three grand. Plus Aaron Hotel

And my manager was too embarrassed to ask for that. He, I had to say, Bruce, you asked for that

Just see if they go for it. And they did. Yeah, of course they did. You're Maria Bamford

Not always, of course. But give people the opportunity to – and also – because I just – I know I have employees for my job, and I don't always know that they're going, Jesus Christ, would she throw me a bone

and so yeah like every two years my my publicist has to say uh maria i'm gonna be needing uh

500 more dollars a month i'm like oh my god yes of course you're like yeah you need to tell we

all need to tell people i think it's also this thing um that i think is true across because we're

we both are in entertainment but in very different aspects of that um but like there's an aspect of

but you have a cool job and isn't that nice. And it's like having a cool job doesn't pay rent. No

And also the reason you in that job is for specific talents that they really need Right So it very specialized and like the still use that were like people ask to open for someone If someone asks you to be open for you on the road and they like a huge

headliner and you're whatever, have selling out theaters, they chose you for a reason because

you're cool, because you're hilarious, because it makes them look cool. Yeah. So if they're making

25 grand at a theater, ask for two grand, like ask, ask for my, but it is like that whole thing

And that's what happens in the documentaries. I have to ask, I ended up getting, putting on paper

a contract with Judd to be paid. I think it was $15,000 total for the documentary. And it did end

up shooting for almost four years. So yeah. And it was a buyout, but it was like, okay

So at least I know that because sometimes projects also fall away

And it's like, well, now I spent 265 hours with Neil here, who's a delight

But – Not a hobby. Yeah. Like I would have preferred to have $15,000 and, you know, or put it towards my retirement, which is always on deck

My retirement is always coming just around the corner. I find that stuff fascinating, just the emotions behind production and money and money

Everybody thinks they'd be good at doing the job. Like, well, I'm funny or like I know how to talk to people

And it's like they don't necessarily recognize the skill set that is entailed in going on stage or is entailed in having to interview someone or interview somebody in front of a room

Speaking intelligently off the cuff on any number of subjects. Like you do beautiful written reviews of film

And it's like, yeah, there's a reason you're doing it is you're good

You're great at it. And it's like, yeah. So or or even if it's like subjective, like I'm I'm great at what I do for some people

And those people have 30 bucks. So, yeah, that's that's something. Yeah, I think to relate back to your conversation about age, I think that's something I've learned a lot, too, is as I've gotten older in this job and in this position, I think I've gotten more confident

I think it's because I've had to advocate for myself more. And it's also recognizing that I'm not everyone's cup of tea and I'm never going to be

And like just allowing myself to accept that has really changed how I operate in my job, but also how I see myself

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That it's okay to double down on what you are

Like I, yeah, I, um, sometimes I get embarrassed, um, of what's happened in my physical presence

And then I go, but what if that's my greatest gift? I don't know

I got that from a life coach. What if your greatest weakness is in fact your greatest gift or your heart's desire

I get those from like Tazzo tea bags where they're like, you're like having a tea and And it's like, hey, the universe is with you

Hey, girl, hey. What I hate is that moment where you're really in a bad place and the teabag says that

You're like, yeah, teabag, I hear you. It's amazing that you're drinking tea, number one

That shows some sense of recovery and self-care. I am trying. I love a good documentary

And part of what I enjoyed about this one is Judd's like, I've been trying to make a movie about Maria for years

And she said, I don't want to be too famous. yeah no do you i mean people who are super famous number one i think they definitely have

the an extreme level of talent but also a work ethic that is bananas like and i'm uh

yeah i also i'm not sure if i want the i only had one moment where i had some worrying amount

of attention where i was doing a target commercial where people would come up to me and go

and want to talk about compulsive shopping. And, yeah, no, I'm good

I like where I'm at, you know, just occasionally have someone come and say

would you sign my prescription bottle? I love that. I also take Depakote

Well, I'm curious because there's a lot of people in the film who are, like, colleagues of yours and friends of yours

who talk about the, like, among, like, Brian Posehn and Zach Galifianakis and like Stephen Colbert, Conan O'Brien, Pat Noswell

Who's like too famous for your liking? Like not that you're judging them for being famous, but like where in that kind of wheelhouse

are you like, I don't want to be that famous. I think, I mean, I think they're all in the running for that

I'm more of a level, I'm trying to think of what would be, well, I just love my life

I love, I do stand-up shows in the morning. It's 9 o'clock in the morning

It's an hour long. I'm done then for the day. And I could do shows at night if I want

But most of the time, otherwise, I can just be really mindful about my bookkeeping

My side hustle. Yeah, and go to lunch. Yeah. Yeah And I mean it is great to work but I think also and I think Joan Rivers during her documentary touched on this of like once you have a big cast and crew who are working around you and you have people who are on the payroll like you got to keep working

Robin Williams said that too. Like he said, paying two forms of alimony

And so I've got to keep acting. And it's like, oh. And I wonder how much of that is true

I think sometimes people don't have curiosity about their own financial systems

You can go, you know, because I had a meeting once with the Development Executive

and they knew I was in a weird 12-step program called Debtors Anonymous. And they're like, so, hey, what would you do

I have a house in the Palisades, and we're just two months late on the mortgage

and I'm just really scared, but kids are in prime school. And I'm like, sell one of your f***ing cars, you dumb dumb

Like, you've got three Mercedes-Benz? Like, what's going on? This isn't a real problem you have

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But so I think people, and I've been the person of, you know, like, I'm so scared

And it's like, no, you're fine. I have my opposable thumbs. And I can work at the suicide hotline

I've been trained. That pays $25 an hour. I'll be fine. I also like that part of what I thought was so great about your documentary

because we actually had Patton on the show a few months ago. Oh, yeah. And we talked about you kind of organically, I think off camera, though

I think it was just we were talking about, like, you know, and he was so, so, like, effusive about how great you are

And I said that, you know, growing up, it was like I really, I had a VHS tape because I would watch Comedy Central

when my parents weren't around, and I would tape the specials I liked so I could watch them whenever I wanted

My lip color would be as invisible as this glass ceiling only inches above my head

The way you talked about yourself so unguarded, I think at the time, made a really big impression on me

And it's only like now as I get older that I'm really recognizing what I think your comedy does is I mean, obviously, it's funny

I feel like that's a given. but then on top of that

it's like there was something so liberating about seeing you kind of talk

about yourself in this unguarded manner and seeing people get it and people embrace it and like over the years

it's like you know they talk in the documentary about how it seems like you're always on the verge of breaking through or something

which is ridiculous like I know I've broken through I'm done you know what I'm saying like I've made it

in show business I'm yeah I'm good I'm good I mean not that I don't

I love to keep working. I love to, I think that's an American thing, the capitalism

Like, my friends own an eyeglass shop, and they're always, like, getting people going

why don't you open a second store? This one is so successful. It's like, because this one is so successful, we just like to have in this eyeglass

What? Yeah. Don't you want 7,000 of them covering the country? No

I love that about the documentary because I think it makes clear, you display pretty clearly there are different ideas of success

and we don't have to. I think it's that very much thing where we are constantly put into

I think it is very much capitalism. It's like, what can you do bigger? What can you do bigger? What can you do bigger

And it's never enough if that's how you're looking at it. No, not, yeah, not at all

I mean, I know I get mad when I go, I watch a Netflix series, and I'm like, why is it done

why can I not see more but then I lose focus and turn to whatever else BritBox

I watch a lot of animation and it's always really fun because I feel like I'm pretty good

at picking out your voice but then you do so many voices I try to make them different

I'm just a big nerd on that response where literally any show

I'm like and that's probably this person but is that a particularly fun thing to do

because you get to kind of have that performance but then you don't have to worry about the fame aspect totally it's so delightful voice

i'm so many comedians uh chris rock said a whole thing about this how wonderful voiceover is

that yeah you just go into a wonderful sound booth and somebody does all the work to edit it

and send it to uh usually they send it to another country to animate it and uh uh yeah it's just

it couldn't be better couldn't be better and i worked as a secretary for a year or so at a at

nickelodeon so it's yeah and i used to love cartoons as a kid i watched cartoons all the time

so it's great it's great it's good job nothing wrong with it and union in the documentary you

also talk about the fact that you've had like a lot of male radio djs typically uh being like well

well, why don't you just use this voice instead of your normal voice

And the presumption of someone to be like, why don't you just the prestige your entire life

What is that like to kind of sit there in those moments and have to be like, how do I not just call you stupid to your face

Yeah, sometimes I get sad when you get... I mean, it's that sort of..

the things haven't changed in terms of like misogyny and like I don't know sometimes I

get really sad when I watch a sketch show and women are playing wives and girlfriends in the and I like mother f Stop it Yeah Why

why are they the straight man in this sketch? You know, I just

I think cause I, I had done that so much in, in when I was doing sketch and improv and

but yeah, it's, I mean, sure. That's an interesting question. why wouldn't I act like somebody else all the time

Because that would be creepy. Right. It just feels like an antithesis to what your comedy is

because while your comedy talks about all kinds of things, and I think I do relate to this, it's just like

I don't know, man, at the end of the day, sometimes it's just easier to be yourself. Like, why are we making the..

And it's hard enough to be yourself. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And, yeah, everybody's..

Yeah, I don't know. I always have the feeling, too, that even if I did a different voice or, you know, I think if somebody doesn't like you at the first go, you're still going to be an untouchable after you get breast implants and a wig and whatever else they really need to have to accept you

Yeah, no, I get that. And I think that's really interesting because I feel like we're in a state where so much of social media is encouraging us to, like, buy this thing and be this person

And like, I cannot tell you how many red light therapy things I've gotten in the past. It's like insulting

Like literally every other thing on my Instagram right now is like red light therapy. And well, I don't even know

What is it? It's literally a red light that you put on your face and it's supposed to make you look younger

You know what I mean? And it's just like, but I think the counter side of that is that people are getting tired

of this assumption that, that you can be flawless. And there's this, this, this pitch

and you know it's like for me it's like that's always what like i've enjoyed so much about your

comedy is like you're really funny and it's really zany but there's always this core of kind of like

this is who i am and whatever like i'm like i take it or leave it yeah yeah i i it is and it's so

so much easier um because yeah everyone always has suggestions like i i know people get mad that

i don't have merch after shows but then my message is make your own merch yeah and there's something

about the consumerism where it's like no you don't have to buy anything or and i try to say

this for all my shows is like if you can't afford to go on to a show please contact me by my email

aria mayanfordbay gmail.com and i will get you in free now i can't say that on some of the ads for

these shows because the people i mean it's just live nation sure we'll say uh please don't say

that um which fair enough i get it uh but yeah that it doesn't yeah so anyways i put just put

that out there that um yeah if you need tickets reach out to your comedian or your musician and

if you can't afford it people want to have fans at their shows like especially somebody who's

so into it they'll write an email to you about it it's funny because i was going over your uh

filmography today and trying to see like what were pockets I was unaware of. And we had Vera

Drew on the show to talk about The People's Joker. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Can you please tell me

about your involvement with The People's Joker? Well, and I, because I haven't seen it yet

Really? I didn't see it yet. I mean, I know it got great reviews at the Toronto Film Festival

and I know the director, Brie LaRose, or I'm not sure if she was called the director

if she was just working with Vera. But, yeah, so they were looking for a voiceover of

who was the guy who was the head of SNN? Lauren Michaels. Lauren Michaels

And, yeah, so I'll do anything for, I think it was $400

I'll do something for you. And maybe it was $250. And, yeah, so I have to see it

I rarely see anything I'm in. or you know is that like is it hard for you to just in like just watch it is that part of i think

i it's like the other it's the false humility thing where it's like i go

oh i don't care i don't even care and it's like maria like my niece was in town in la

and i'm like you guys wouldn't want to go see me do a voiceover on adventure it's like the

spin-off of Adventure Time it's called um Side Quest and they're like yes you know like because I

I just I don't want to be rejected or so so uh yeah I I think yeah I'm also it's weird to why

and I I usually am I'm not a fan of myself when I see myself acting sure I mean I think it's hard

because it's like we have our own perceptions of ourselves, so it's hard to see what other people are seeing

Yeah, yes. It's just been such a pleasure talking with you. Thank you so much for having me

Yeah. Is there anything else you want to tell people about anything you've coming up or the doc

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