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Have you ever wondered why certain
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people seem to target you for
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manipulation? Why they sense your
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kindness, your openness, and use it
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against you? Maybe you keep finding
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yourself in relationships where you feel
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taken advantage of. Maybe you always
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seem to be the one who gives more, cares
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more, and gets hurt more. Nicolo
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Mchavelli, known for his sharp,
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sometimes brutal insights into human
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nature, would tell you, "It's not an
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accident. There's something you're doing
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that makes you a magnet for
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manipulators. Mchaveli wrote, "Men judge
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generally more by the eye than by the
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hand. Everyone sees what you appear to
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be. Few really know what you are." In
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other words, people don't relate to who
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you truly are. They relate to what you
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show them. So, what is the behavior that
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attracts manipulators? It's this. Being
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too eager to please. When you try to be
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liked by everyone. When you avoid
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conflict at all costs, when you
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constantly put others needs above your
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own, you become an easy target. Mchaveli
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believed most people are driven by
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self-interest. He wasn't saying people
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are always bad, but he warned that many
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will prioritize their own gain over your
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well-being if you let them. He wrote,
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"It is better to be feared than loved if
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Now, this doesn't mean you should live
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in fear or become cruel. But it means
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stop making approval your highest goal.
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When you are addicted to being liked,
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you will say yes when you mean no.
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Overgive to those who never reciprocate.
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Apologize for things that aren't your
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fault. Stay silent to keep the peace
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even when your soul screams. And
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manipulators sense this. They look for
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people who doubt their worth. People who
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crave external validation. people who
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can be guilt tripped or flattered into
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compliance. So what does Makavelli
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advise instead? Here are five powerful
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shifts to protect yourself. Shift number
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one, embrace strategic boundaries.
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Boundaries are not walls. They are doors
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you choose to open or close consciously.
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Mchavelli believed in self-control as
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power. By setting clear limits, you
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teach people how to treat you. When you
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honor your own space, you attract
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relationships built on respect, not
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manipulation. Shift number two, stop
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oversharing. Manipulators feed on your
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secrets and vulnerabilities. They use
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them to twist narratives, play victim or
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control you. Mchaveli would say, "The
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wise man does it once what the fool
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does." Finally, speak your truth, but be
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selective. Not everyone deserves access
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to your inner world. Shift number three,
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practice selective kindness. Being kind
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is beautiful, but being kind without
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discernment is dangerous. True kindness
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is conscious, not compulsive. It's
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offered freely, not out of fear of
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rejection. When you give to everyone
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without discernment, you drain yourself
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and invite takers. Shift number four,
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detach from external approval. The
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moment you stop needing everyone to like
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you, you become untouchable.
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Manipulators lose power over those who
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don't crave their praise. Mchavelli
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valued independence above charm. He
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believed in standing rooted in your own
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principles, even if it meant standing
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alone. Shift number five, observe
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patterns, not promises. People can say
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anything. They can promise the world,
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but their patterns reveal the truth. Who
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shows up when things get hard? Who
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honors your boundaries without guilt
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tripping? Who respects you even when you
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say no? Trust patterns over words
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always. So, what does this look like in
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real life? Here are five practical ways
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to embody Mchaveli's wisdom. One, say no
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without guilt. Two, keep some thoughts
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and plans to yourself. Let your actions
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speak. Three, watch how people respond
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to your boundaries. Take note. Four,
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choose respect over approval. Five,
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evaluate relationships by consistency,
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not charm. Because here's the core
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truth. Manipulators thrive where there
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is weakness of self. When you stand
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strong in your worth, you naturally
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repel those who come to take. Mchavelli
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reminds us, "The lion cannot protect
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himself from traps, and the fox cannot
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defend himself from wolves. One must
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therefore be a fox to recognize traps,
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and a lion to frighten wolves. You need
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both wisdom to see through games,
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courage to protect your heart. So today,
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ask yourself, where am I still giving
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away my power for approval? Which
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relationships drain me instead of
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support me? How can I choose
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self-respect over being liked? Because
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the respect you seek starts when you
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respect yourself first. If this
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resonated with you and comment below, I
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choose respect over approval. And
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remember, your power isn't in being
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everything to everyone. It's in being
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true to yourself fiercely, wisely,
