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Why Stay At Home Moms Are So Burned Out + Day In The Life of a Slow Living Mom & Homemaker
May 24, 2026
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0:00
I think a lot of stay-at-home moms are
0:03
carrying a level of exhaustion that
0:07
nobody really talks about honestly. And
0:09
I realized that it's not just physical
0:12
exhaustion, but a bulk of it is also
0:15
mental exhaustion. And it's like our
0:18
minds, our brains never fully rests or
0:24
sleeps even when our body physically is
0:27
resting and sleeping. And if you are
0:29
also like a mom of specifically like
0:33
young kids, even older ones as well, you
0:36
often wake up already thinking about
0:38
meals, laundry, appointments, cleaning,
0:42
finances, nap schedules, grocery list,
0:44
dishes in the sink, the thing that you
0:46
forgot yesterday, the thing that you
0:47
need to remember for tomorrow. And
0:49
somewhere along the way, you kind of
0:51
just stop feeling like a person and
0:53
start feeling like the system just
0:55
holding everything together. And this is
0:57
something that I've been thinking a lot
1:00
about lately because I know a lot of
1:03
moms who are just tired, exhausting, and
1:06
feeling like they are failing. And I
1:08
genuinely believe that many mothers are
1:11
not failing at motherhood. I think that
1:15
we're just overloaded. Modern motherhood
1:18
looks like moms carrying an unbelievable
1:24
amount both mentally and emotionally,
1:28
but physically too. And it's just become
1:31
a thing that's just normal. And then if
1:33
you're struggling, the advice is usually
1:36
manage your time better, wake up
1:38
earlier, be more disciplined, follow a
1:41
better routine. And while all of that is
1:44
helpful, it's great. It's helped me.
1:47
It's been beneficial. I don't think that
1:49
burnout is just always a time management
1:54
problem. I think that many moms are just
1:57
trying to survive lifestyles that just
2:00
don't leave much room for rest or quiet
2:03
or support or just space in our days for
2:06
God to lead us down the path that he
2:09
wants us to walk. He gave us our role as
2:13
moms and sometimes we're leaving him out
2:16
of the mix. So, I just wanted to talk
2:18
honestly about why so many stay-at-home
2:20
moms feel burnt out and overwhelmed,
2:23
over stimulated, and emotionally
2:25
drained. And maybe by the end of this
2:27
video, you will feel like you're less
2:30
alone in it. And I will be the first
2:33
today to say that I'm right in it with
2:36
you. Because one of the hardest parts
2:37
about staying home with children is that
2:40
your mind is always on. There's no real
2:45
separation between work and rest. And
2:49
you can sit down on the couch at night
2:51
and still be mentally managing the
2:54
household. You are noticing the toys on
2:57
the floor. You're noticing those dishes
3:00
that still need to be done, the laundry
3:02
that needs to be folded tomorrow,
3:04
grocery items that you forget, dinner
3:06
that you still need to cook, meal
3:07
planning for next week. Your child might
3:10
wake up in the middle of the night, and
3:12
your body might technically not be
3:14
moving, but mentally, you're kind of
3:16
still working. You're not fully resting.
3:19
And I think it's that constant mental
3:21
overload that slowly drains people over
3:25
time. And especially mothers because so
3:29
much of motherhood can feel invisible
3:32
sometimes like nobody can actually see
3:35
or track what's actually happening in
3:38
your day or in your mind all day long.
3:40
You're not docking your hours for a pay
3:43
period. You are just doing things, you
3:48
know, unconditionally and unwarranted.
3:51
And yeah, it can just kind of feel
3:53
invisible sometimes. You're remembering
3:55
all of the things that need to get done
3:59
in the day. You're trying to care for
4:01
yourself, but you're trying to care for
4:03
others as well. And depending on how
4:05
many children you have, you could be
4:06
trying to care for one or two, three,
4:09
maybe even 10. When you think of all of
4:11
the little things that we do separately,
4:14
it sounds small until you realize that
4:17
your brain has been multitasking for 12
4:20
straight hours every single day. I've
4:24
been a mother for seven years now. My
4:26
oldest just turned seven. And as I've
4:30
been unpacking things and as I have been
4:33
eliminating the stress and over
4:36
stimulation in my life and really really
4:38
slowing down, I'm learning that
4:41
everything that I had learned in past 7
4:44
years about motherhood is just not how
4:46
it's meant to be. I don't think I
4:48
understood how overstimulated I'd become
4:50
until I actually began to crave silence
4:54
constantly. I remember fasting for 48
4:57
hours straight just asking God to help
5:00
me to find peace in my days and he
5:04
responded and told me that it's not
5:06
going to be found in silence. The thing
5:08
is that motherhood can be incredibly
5:11
loud but not in the ways that one might
5:14
think. It could be noise from toys, from
5:18
shows playing in the background,
5:20
questions every few minutes, babies
5:22
crying and people touching you all day,
5:24
constant interruptions,
5:27
even simple tasks become mentally
5:30
exhausting when your attention span is
5:32
being pulled in 10 different directions
5:34
at once. I noticed there were days where
5:37
one more sound genuinely felt
5:40
overwhelming to me. Like I was like
5:44
holding my hands over my face just
5:46
trying to shut everything off and then
5:49
realizing that what I was trying to shut
5:50
off wasn't even external. It was like
5:53
inside of my head, hence the like
5:55
holding my head just wanting just a
5:58
little break. just a little bit of a
6:00
slower pace on the outside, but also on
6:03
the inside mostly. And for a while, I
6:07
actually felt guilty about that. But
6:10
over stimulation is real, especially
6:13
when you spend all day responding to
6:16
needs without much space to regulate
6:20
yourself. And the hard part is that many
6:23
moms don't even get recovery time
6:25
afterward. you finish a hard day and
6:29
move directly into dinner, bedtime,
6:33
cleaning, laundry, resetting the house.
6:36
If you're a work from home mom, a
6:37
content creator, homeschool mom, that's
6:40
extra things to do. And if you are also
6:43
a wife and married, we also want to
6:46
nourish our marriage and spend time with
6:48
our spouses as well. So, we're doing all
6:51
of these things. We're trying to take
6:52
care of ourselves. But in our workout
6:54
routine, our prayer, our daily
6:56
devotions, and then we wake up and we do
6:58
it again. And there's just very little
7:00
silence. There's very little solitude
7:03
and very little uninterrupted thoughts
7:06
that's just going to happen on its own.
7:10
And so these are just things that we
7:13
need and things that we kind of just
7:15
have to learn how to be intentional
7:18
with getting. Something that I feel has
7:20
really become increasingly invasive in
7:23
our lives, not just as moms, but just
7:26
our lives in general, I think, is social
7:29
media. It has quietly raised the
7:33
standard for everybody, not just moms.
7:38
But it's almost in a way that is just so
7:42
unsustainable in terms of just
7:44
motherhood. It's just no longer
7:47
motherhood. It's also about
7:48
presentation. Your home looking
7:50
beautiful. Your meals have to look a
7:53
certain way. Your routines should look
7:56
organized. Your children should look
7:58
peaceful and well behaved. And even if
8:01
we know that social media isn't fully
8:04
real, it still affects us. and we start
8:06
feeling behind in our own lives like
8:08
everybody else has figured something out
8:10
that we haven't. Recently, I talked on
8:13
my last video about how one day I was
8:16
just trying to talk myself into going
8:19
down to the pool because I didn't want
8:21
to be labeled as a tablet mom because I
8:24
knew that my 2-year-old would not sit
8:26
still while we just wanted to sit
8:29
poolside but weren't able to get in the
8:31
pool for maintenance reasons. It was a
8:34
completely separate video, so I won't go
8:37
too far back into the story, but it's
8:39
like just me all up inside of my own
8:42
head when all the while nobody probably
8:46
even cared. But I was always so
8:48
constantly worried about what it looked
8:50
like from the outside looking in. And we
8:53
can often do that with social media as
8:58
well, especially because we're often
9:00
posting every single day. Recently, I
9:04
have been trying to limit my social
9:06
media for the past 2 weeks. I've cut out
9:09
social media throughout the week unless
9:12
it's for business purposes in which I
9:15
use my laptop primarily. And then I use
9:19
social media on the weekends, Friday
9:21
through Sunday, trying to limit it on
9:25
Sundays as well. And then uninstall it
9:28
again on Monday from my phone. I kind of
9:30
just archive it. So, I'm not like
9:32
completely uninstalling it. I'm just
9:33
archiving it because I learned myself
9:37
that even, you know, though I'm talking
9:40
about this, even as a slow living mother
9:42
and everything, I was consuming much
9:45
more inspiration than what I could
9:47
actually live out. I love to gain
9:51
inspiration from other people, from
9:54
books, from other people's life. It's
9:57
always great to be constantly, you know,
9:59
learning something that maybe you didn't
10:02
even know exists, but too many routines,
10:05
too many standards, and too many voices
10:08
telling moms how to do everything
10:10
perfectly can eventually no longer feel
10:13
helpful and just kind of just start to
10:15
feel overwhelming because it's a lot.
10:19
One thing that has helped me is just
10:22
kind of choosing just maybe two to three
10:26
content creators that I consume on a
10:29
regular basis and once I've outgrown
10:31
that content creator, just move on to
10:33
another one. And I know, right? You
10:35
probably are like, well, you yourself
10:37
are a content creator. And it's true. As
10:39
much as I love to help moms to let go of
10:44
that pressure and to live a more simple
10:47
and slow and less overwhelming life, I
10:50
have to bring awareness to some of the
10:52
things that are giving us and causing us
10:55
so much pressure. And so, I hope that my
10:57
channel would just feel like a breath of
10:59
fresh air and not too daunting. And I'm
11:02
never going to tell you that this is the
11:04
way that you should be doing it, but I
11:07
will still aim to be as helpful and
11:09
inspirational as I can. I think that one
11:13
of the biggest reasons that burnout
11:16
happens is because rest and
11:18
responsibility exists all in the same
11:21
space all day long. Even when you're
11:24
resting, you can still see what needs to
11:27
be done. You can still hear the
11:29
children. I'm nursing my child still.
11:31
So, I'm nursing her to sleep and I am
11:35
going to be doing that up until she is 2
11:38
years old. So, I feel like my body is
11:40
still, you know, making milk. I'm still,
11:43
you know, constantly just busy. Even
11:47
when I'm resting, I'm sometimes sleeping
11:51
with the baby monitor or even when I'm
11:53
like working or taking my walks, I have
11:56
the baby monitor. I'm constantly on
11:58
alert, right? You know that dinner is
12:00
coming up. you know that the house is
12:01
going to need to be reset later. There's
12:04
not a lot of mental separation and many
12:06
moms carry guilt anytime they stop
12:09
moving. Like rest has to be earned
12:13
first. And I realized this when on
12:15
Mother's Day that just passed, my
12:17
husband told me, "Go out, do something."
12:21
And you guys, I didn't I didn't do it.
12:23
Like he gave me a gift card. He gave me
12:24
a full schedule to go out and rest. And
12:27
I stayed home. And even staying home and
12:31
resting, a slight part of me felt
12:33
guilty, you know, and so I realized that
12:36
it's time for us to let go of that
12:39
thought that rest depends on everything
12:42
being done first or else we're never
12:44
fully going to rest. You know, I used to
12:47
feel like, how can I rest when all these
12:49
things, you know, have to be taken care
12:52
of? I just felt a little bit guilty
12:54
about it, you know, and I had to realize
12:56
that productivity was starting to define
12:59
my worth. If I had a productive day, I
13:01
felt successful. But if I didn't, I
13:04
often felt so guilty. And that mindset
13:08
is truly exhausting because motherhood
13:10
already involves repetitive work that
13:13
resets every single day. You clean the
13:16
kitchen and somebody eats again. You
13:18
fold laundry and another basket appears.
13:20
you clean the floor, somebody spills
13:22
something. There is nothing wrong with
13:24
that. That is just a part of caring for
13:27
a home and a family. But if you
13:28
constantly expect visible completion,
13:32
motherhood can just start to feel
13:34
defeating. Another thing that really
13:37
really hit home for me especially is
13:40
that many moms are lonely. And I don't
13:43
think that people talk about how
13:45
isolating staying home can feel.
13:48
Sometimes you can spend all day with
13:50
your children or with your spouse and
13:53
just feel lonely still, especially if
13:56
there's not a lot of people in your
13:57
circle that you can talk to about, you
13:59
know, just some of the things that go on
14:00
in your daily life. You guys, I
14:01
literally have a friend that maybe I'm
14:04
crazy, but it feels like, and I've had
14:06
this friend since childhood. We met when
14:09
I was like 8 years old, but she doesn't
14:11
have any children. And I feel like
14:13
whenever I talk about my children, her
14:15
phone just magically hangs up. I kid you
14:18
not, it's been going on so long. Even
14:21
when I was pregnant, maybe I talk about
14:23
my kids too much. I don't know. But the
14:25
thing is that adult connection really
14:27
matters. Being emotionally seen matters
14:30
as well. And many mothers are carrying
14:33
hard things quietly because they feel
14:35
like they should just be grateful. But
14:38
gratitude and exhaustion can actually
14:41
exist together. like you can deeply love
14:43
your children and still feel mentally
14:45
depleted. You can appreciate staying
14:47
home and you can still struggle and
14:50
those things are actually not
14:52
contradictions. And I think a lot of
14:54
moms need permission to say that this is
14:57
harder than I expected. Not because they
15:00
hate motherhood, but because they're
15:02
human. And there's nothing wrong with
15:05
admitting that something is harder than
15:07
you expected. I myself have been
15:09
catching myself in this as well because
15:12
having two children is a little bit
15:14
harder than having one obviously and I'm
15:18
just thanking God every single day. I'm
15:20
so so so grateful just trying not to
15:22
miss that one single moment with my
15:25
children and these tiny moments that go
15:28
by so fast. I can't believe she's two.
15:31
Some days it's really really hard and I
15:32
just really beat myself up admitting
15:35
that you know and about you know feeling
15:39
that way like wow this is hard but it's
15:42
okay for us to be emotional and
15:45
vulnerable. Modern motherhood expects
15:48
moms to run like a machine, to be
15:52
emotionally available, to keep the home
15:55
clean, cook healthy meals, manage
15:57
finances wisely, to keep our children
16:00
stimulated, exercise, build income, you
16:03
know, to be resourceful like the proverb
16:05
starting one woman to stay attractive,
16:07
to stay organized, and somehow carry all
16:11
of it calmly, be graceful. Right? At
16:15
some point, I realized that I was just
16:17
treating basic human limitations like
16:22
personal failures, like really beating
16:23
myself up about it. And as human, we
16:27
really do have limitations. It's a fact
16:30
that we only have so much energy before
16:34
our bodies need to rest and start over
16:37
again. And a lot of us are pushing past
16:40
those limits on a daily basis and then
16:43
wondering why everything is so hard. And
16:46
it's because you were never meant to
16:48
overdo it every single day. The truth is
16:51
just that without enough rest, without
16:54
enough quiet, or without enough help, we
16:58
just cannot sustain it all. And I used
17:01
to blame myself instead of questioning
17:03
the pace that I was trying to actually
17:07
maintain. Many of us don't question the
17:09
pace that we're actually trying to
17:13
maintain. And once we do, it can change
17:16
a lot. It changed a lot for me. I
17:18
recently saw a video on YouTube of a
17:20
mother who said that slow living, it's a
17:24
lie for moms, specifically homeschooled
17:28
moms. She said it's just not attainable
17:30
and that the truth is that we weren't
17:32
taught to steward a full home, you know,
17:35
basically. And you know, I would
17:38
definitely like to challenge that
17:40
narrative because you can definitely
17:42
slow down your pace to be much more
17:45
sustainable and much more maintainable.
17:47
Even as a mom and as a homeschool mom, I
17:50
myself have been doing it. And it has
17:54
been truly truly freeing to where I now
17:58
can kind of just notice when I'm
18:01
starting to do too much again, when my
18:03
house is becoming, you know, too full of
18:06
just like stuff that are non-essential
18:09
and know how to listen to my body,
18:12
listen to my mind, and listen to my
18:14
nervous system and slow down the pace
18:16
again. Because burnout is not always
18:19
caused by weakness. Sometimes it's
18:21
caused by prolonged overload. And
18:25
unfortunately, many of us just do not
18:27
know it. And many of us don't even know
18:30
how to recognize it. And so, I wish that
18:32
I could say that there was one big fix.
18:36
But I'm not going to lie to you.
18:37
Honestly, it was smaller shifts over
18:40
time that started to help me. I just
18:44
started to simplify wherever I could. I
18:49
first started with decluttering and then
18:52
I started pushing towards simpler meals.
18:55
I started figuring out how I can slow
18:57
down my daily rhythms with less rushing,
19:01
less pressure to keep up online. Like I
19:03
said, I recently also started, you know,
19:06
trying to limit social media. I stopped
19:09
trying to optimize every single part of
19:12
motherhood and trying to fill in every
19:15
single moment of our days and our
19:17
schedules with something productive. And
19:19
I just started protecting the atmosphere
19:21
of our home more carefully because I
19:23
realized that constant chaos was
19:25
affecting me deeply and it was affecting
19:28
my children and spouse as well. And even
19:30
if it wasn't directly affecting them by,
19:35
you know, me constantly being
19:37
overwhelmed and over stimulated, they
19:39
could see it. And in a way that did
19:41
affect them, too. And so I started
19:43
paying attention to my nervous system.
19:45
And you guys, the thing is that I used
19:47
to see videos of people talking about
19:49
how to fix or repair your nervous
19:52
system. And I was like, it just sounds
19:54
so cliche. But as I've been deep diving
19:57
into more like older books and reading
20:00
more and really feeling the different
20:03
effects of slowing down in life, I kind
20:07
of get it now. It's not a cliche. It
20:09
just sounds like it because we we label
20:12
everything and once we start to label
20:14
everything, it sounds just trendy,
20:17
crazy, you know, but it's just fact.
20:19
It's just normal. It's just real life,
20:22
you know. And so that's why everybody
20:25
has like anxiety now and our brains are
20:29
just always on edge. Our minds, our
20:32
bodies, and it's not just about a to-do
20:34
list. And I noticed that slower rhythms
20:37
helped me to feel more emotionally
20:40
present. I remember telling you guys
20:42
like I stopped drinking coffee because I
20:45
was always on edge. And it's true. It's
20:47
a stimulant. So yeah, it's going to make
20:49
you a little bit more on edge,
20:51
especially if you drink it quite often.
20:53
It's going to mess up your sleep cycle,
20:55
all those things. But it was also just
20:58
simple things that helped me to just
21:01
calm down, you know, my nervous system,
21:05
like just quieter mornings and less
21:07
background noise, going outside more and
21:10
fewer commitments, slower evenings,
21:13
cleaning, and smaller instead of like a
21:16
marathon of resets. You guys know I used
21:18
to always do like those whole house
21:20
resets and yeah, I got burnt out. And so
21:24
none of these things made motherhood
21:26
effortless, but they definitely made it
21:30
feel more breathable and more
21:33
maintainable and more manageable. And
21:36
it's just something that I just don't
21:38
want to keep to myself because, you
21:39
know, it's just I hate to see moms
21:42
struggling with this God-given role that
21:45
we were given. Um, it's truly a blessing
21:48
to be a mom. It's just it's just it's a
21:53
beautiful beautiful thing. The creation
21:56
of life, you know, and to hold these
21:58
lives in our hands is something that a
22:02
lot of us struggle to truly appreciate
22:03
because of how overwhelmed and burnt out
22:05
we are. I don't want that for anybody. I
22:08
wish that everybody that we could bring
22:10
more awareness, especially in the online
22:12
world, to the beauties and the true joy
22:15
of motherhood without the overwhelmed.
22:18
Instead, it's like motherhood, it's
22:21
beautiful, but that's exhausting. And
22:24
being a mom is one of the greatest
22:26
blessings, but it's also one of the
22:28
hardest. You know, I wish there was a
22:30
way for us to get away from that because
22:32
right now that's just the reality for
22:35
most moms and sometimes for me, too. So,
22:38
if you've been feeling burnt out lately,
22:40
then I hope that this video helps you to
22:42
feel seen, to feel unerstood. I think
22:45
many stay-at-home moms are carrying much
22:48
more than people realize, but I don't
22:51
think it has to be that way. I also
22:53
think that moms deserve a lot more
22:56
gentleness than this culture often
22:58
gives. And our value, your value is not
23:03
measured by how productive you are every
23:05
hour of the day or every day of the
23:07
week. You can take a whole day off. And
23:10
your exhaustion does not mean like that
23:12
you're failing. It might simply mean
23:15
that you've just been carrying too much
23:17
for for too long. And so I know I talk a
23:19
lot on this channel about decluttering
23:21
and slow living and minimalism a little
23:25
bit and there's a reason, you know, if
23:28
your life feels loud lately, maybe this
23:31
is the reminder to just stop adding
23:33
pressure everywhere
23:36
you can to figure out something. Just
23:40
something. Start with one thing that you
23:42
can simplify or one thing that you can
23:46
slow down. It doesn't have to be a whole
23:50
house decluttering session. You don't
23:52
have to do like I did and delete social
23:55
media. You don't have to cut down your
23:57
whole schedule in half. Maybe just leave
24:01
something unfinished or sit outside for
24:04
a minute or cut out all distractions
24:07
while you sip your morning tea or coffee
24:10
or cup of water and protect your piece a
24:14
little more. carefully without feeling
24:18
bad about it. Because motherhood feels
24:20
lighter when everything stops feeling
24:24
like an emergency. Like why are we
24:27
rushing? Like I had to ask myself that
24:28
because I felt like we were like weeks
24:31
maybe a whole month behind with home
24:33
school and I instantly felt it and I was
24:35
like okay we have to rush. We have to
24:37
catch up because what because summer
24:38
break is coming up. It's like what are
24:40
we going to do once we finish? We're
24:42
just going to start something else. Not
24:44
everything needs to be rushed and not
24:46
everything is an emergency. So, if this
24:48
video encouraged you, if you've been
24:50
struggling with burnout too, then I
24:52
would love to hear from you in the
24:54
comments so that I can encourage you and
24:58
uplift you. Let's encourage each other,
25:01
uplift each other because you're not
25:04
alone in this. And I know too that even
25:08
though motherhood can often feel very
25:10
lonely that I'm not alone in this, too.
25:12
So, I hope that you guys enjoyed this
25:15
video. Thank you for watching and just
25:18
sitting with me and talking mom to mom.
25:21
I will see you guys in the next
#People & Society