7 Months SOBER (My 7 Steps) Pros & Cons of quitting ALCOHOL
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A lot of these people, when you quit drinking, they were never your friends
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I don't like the past version, but I'm not going to sit there and dwell on the mistakes
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that I've made or all the troubles that I caused in my past
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You're not the loser that everybody calls you just because you're sober. Seven months ago, I was stumbling around the campfire thinking I was being funny, not remembering
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what was happening, not paying attention to my children. Past four or seven months, whole new life
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I am seven months sober today. As most of you know that have been following me, I am getting closer and closer to that
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one year mark. I have a seven in seven recipe for you to help you get to seven months sober with these
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seven steps. Say that seven times fast. Step one, get going. A lot of us have a really hard time pushing the start button, getting going, taking that
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first step. That's a really big commitment for a big life change, sobriety
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Not everybody can conquer it and a lot of people don't know where to start
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But really, you just have to start. You can't just keep like, I'll start tomorrow, I'll start Monday, I'll start next year, I'll
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start next month, maybe in a few weeks, oh, after my birthday, oh, after Christmas, after
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New Year's. Hello? When are you going to start? Never. There's always going to be something that's holding you back to help you get going
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You just have to make the commitment to yourself and empower your own self to get going and
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embrace the journey because it's not easy. Everybody has a different level of alcohol dependency
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For a lot of us, it's really hard. And then for some of us, it's all about our mindset
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And the day that I chose to do this, I didn't go into it thinking that I would say no to
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alcohol for as long as I have. I honestly can't imagine having alcohol back in my life
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How good I feel and like, my mental health, physical health, my relationships, my mental
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health, learning boundaries. It's a whole new world and it just took me to commit to one thing starting on July 10th
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and my whole entire world has changed. I got going. I didn't let anything hold me back and here I am, seven months, completely sober
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It took me 20 years to realize that I didn't need alcohol in my life anymore
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Alcohol was a huge part of my life. Every function, every emotion, every single thing was revolved around alcohol
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I couldn't wait to get my hands on the next drink, the next bottle, the next social event
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with alcohol. It was always just based around alcohol and now it's not
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Now I live a completely different life, a different me, a stronger me, all because I
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decided to get going and let alcohol be a thing of the past
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Quit looking for the bottom of the bottle, dump it out and get going
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Step two, avoid band-aid fixes. This is a good one. Band-aids do not fix bullet holes
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Real change goes deeper, way deeper than surface level solutions. It's finding a purpose that resonates with your heart and fuels your journey forward
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Alcohol is only a temporary fix for all those deep wounds and it does not fill the void
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within us even though we think it does, but it's only temporary
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I had to address the root that was causing me to drink, whether that be past trauma
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like adult trauma, childhood trauma, wounds that have never been healed, trying to fit
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in with other people, social anxiety. You cannot put a band-aid on social anxiety
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You cannot put a band-aid on trauma. You have to face it head on for you to heal because that band-aid's not going to cover
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up all those deep roots. It's gonna take a lot of time to face it to help you heal
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If you don't face it, you're not gonna heal and you have to let it out
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You have to let it out. Sometimes when we cover up our wounds with a band-aid, it's just gonna keep covering
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and covering and it's never gonna heal properly. What do you do with the cut? You take the band-aid off, you clean it out, you air it out, and you let it heal
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Just like our own mental issues, our mental health, our physical, like everything
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You cannot use alcohol as a band-aid for your life. For 20 years, I didn't realize that I was using alcohol as a band-aid to cover up all
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of my issues, my insecurity issues, my confidence issues, my social anxiety issues, past traumas
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I mean, it all escalates and it just, we run to alcohol, we look at the bottom of the bottle
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to solve our problems and cover up everything that's causing all of these deep-rooted issues
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until you put that bottle down, open up, and realize, hey, maybe this is why I'm drinking
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Maybe I don't need it. Maybe I actually do need to heal and go on with my life
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It's gonna hurt. Any wound hurts. And it's gonna take a long time
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You're not going to heal a deep cut in just a few weeks
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It's going to take months. For some of us, it's going to take years
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I wish I could tell you guys that it's an easy wound to heal
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I'm still working on a lot of things and a lot of us, past that one year mark, also are
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working on things. It takes a long time to heal. You lose friends in the process
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Were those friends just there because they also had the same issues as you
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Like insecurity issues, confidence issues, just trying to bring you down with them
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Now they don't want to see you succeed, they just want to keep seeing you fail
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And then it's too much for them. They just give up on you and they don't cheer you on
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And that's painful. That is a wound that we still have to heal ourselves
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We thought these people were our friends. Unfortunately, a lot of these people, when you quit drinking, they were never your friends
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They were just there for a good time, for a free freaking drop of alcohol, free food
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I mean, whatever. Rip that bandaid off, heal that wound before it gets infected and takes over your life
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even more. Step three, offload baggage. Progress necessitates letting go of the things that are holding us down
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Through this journey, the last seven months, I've realized that I've had to let go of a
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lot of baggage. I've had to release the burdens of my past, whether it's toxic relationships, detrimental
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habits or lingering regrets. Holding onto baggage just weighs you down. You go into new relationships and you're like, oh crap, you got a lot of baggage
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I don't want to deal with this. Some of us turn to the bottle because we can't let go of the old baggage
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We're going to hold onto it. It's just going to keep dragging us down. And where are you going to go
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You're just going to get so heavy that you're just going to stop progressing in life
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And well, now what? You have to find good support. Maybe some of these old baggages, you know, toxic relationships or these bad habits, maybe
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they're holding you back and they won't let you go, but you have to let that go
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You have to move forward. You have to find good support. Those detrimental habits, coming home instantly, pouring a glass of wine, pouring, you know
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whiskey and Coke, vodka and soda. I mean, is that like a habit that you need to break
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Like you need to offload that baggage. Maybe come home, grab like a seltzer water or, you know, maybe some type of soda, something
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coffee, I don't know, tea. Like get rid of those detrimental habits as in that old baggage and go get new baggage
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Grab something refreshing other than alcohol. Go for a walk, go for a bike ride, maybe go hiking, do a workout
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Did you leave the house dirty before you left because you drank too much the night before
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and now you're stressed that you have to come home and clean the house
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I mean, all these things, if you let go of the old baggage, you start realizing that
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there's a new way of life. You're refreshed, you're lighter, and you don't have to stress so much
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You don't have something weighing you down and you can move forward
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Your life is going to seem a lot easier. Yes, not in the beginning
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I never said that it'll be easy, but letting go of things that are holding you back is
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definitely a must. You have to get rid of it to move forward
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A huge thing that I actually have noticed is finding a therapist
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There's nothing wrong with saying, hey, my counselor or hey, my therapist. They become your best friend that you can offload all these things to, which help navigate
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getting past these toxic things that are holding you back, that are weighing you down and finding
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that support. I literally don't think that I could have done it without my therapist and the support
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that I've had from some of my friends and my family just pushing me forward and helping
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lift me up when I feel heavier. It's literally teamwork with everybody around you
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If you can't find a therapist or you don't want to go to therapy, find some type of support group
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Find a support friend that's sober. Find a family member that can help navigate through these hard times
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This community, online communities are absolutely amazing. I don't know how many comments I get daily about how I've helped change their life
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I've helped them quit drinking. There's so many days sober. There's so many months sober now
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You have to find that positive support to be able to let go of that baggage
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Only 10% of you are subscribed. If the other 90% hit that subscribe button, we could reach out and help so many more people
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Number four, start over. Recognizing that you can start over is a very powerful realization
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Your past does not define your future. No matter your background, no matter the mistakes you've made, every day presents an
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opportunity to rebuild and redefine yourself. The step is about forgiving yourself, accepting your past, and moving forward with a commitment
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to be a better version of yourself. The old version of yourself does not define your new self
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You can be better. You have to realize that starting over, being a better version of yourself, that is completely okay
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I mean, I definitely know people don't like the newer version of me, that's for sure
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but that's okay. I don't like the past version. I'm not going to sit there and dwell on the mistakes that I've made or all the troubles
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that I've caused in my past. I'm going to move forward, be a healthier version of myself, a stronger version of myself
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and if people don't accept the new version of you, then they were never meant to be in
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your life in the first place, and that is definitely okay. You're not that person that's passed out in front of everybody else
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You're not that person dancing on the tables, dancing on the counters. You're not that person taking off your shirt, thinking it's fun
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You're not that person getting kicked out of bars or concerts, and you're not that person
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getting arrested for being a freaking fool because you're wasted in public
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You're not that person drinking and driving. You're not that person losing your family anymore
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You're not that person losing your family. You're not that person losing your job
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You're a better version of yourself. You are not a loser. You're not the loser that everybody calls you just because you're sober
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Number five, new outlook. Achieving and maintaining sobriety requires a fundamental shift in your outlook on life
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Achieving and maintaining sobriety requires a fundamental shift in your outlook on life
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It's about transforming fear, loneliness, and stress into hope, connection, and peace
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Changing your mindset is critical. It empowers you to face challenges with resilience and to see every obstacle as an opportunity
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for growth. The day that my mindset shifted about halfway into 75 Hard is when I was like, wow, there's
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a whole different life without alcohol. I can do this. I felt stronger
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I was losing weight. My clarity was coming back. My energy was coming back
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I felt more present with my kids. And if that isn't a new outlook on life, I don't know what is
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Going out, adventuring more, being more active with my job, being more active with my children
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and my family, just not being so negative about every single thing
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Life wasn't revolved around alcohol anymore. There was a different outlook on life
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More like refreshing, more energized. There was peace. It was just, it was a whole, whole different ballgame
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As soon as that mindset shifted, it was definitely life changing. I can like face things now
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I have a different strength in me. I have learned boundaries. Can definitely set boundaries now
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I didn't feel like I was worth being able to set boundaries because I didn't feel very
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confident in myself because, oh, what is this life thing that I'm doing
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Just being drugged down constantly, just not really having any, any hope for life
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Just day to day, drinking, coming home, drinking, weekends, all day drinking, events, drinking
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you know, camping, drinking, family vacations, drinking. All of it was just drinking
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There was no different outlook. It was just all about looking for the next drink
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But when you let go of the bottle, your eyes open, your mind opens and your body just feels
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so refreshed and you have a whole new outlook on life. You actually enjoy doing things completely sober now
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Step six, commitment. Sobriety is a choice that demands ongoing commitment. You have to commit to being sober because if you don't commit to it, you're going to fail
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Honestly, so many people just take it day by day. Like, oh, well, I think I just won't drink this week or I just, you know, I can't do it
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I don't think I can do it. I don't want to do it. Like maybe I'll just do dry January. Oh, maybe I'll just do sober October
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You literally have to commit to the lifestyle of being sober. Does that mean having a club soda and lime versus vodka and soda
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Yes, it does. Because you're committing. You can go out with your friends, have a soda on hand without the alcohol because you have
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committed to a different type of life. You've committed to being sober and there's nothing wrong with that
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If it means having to have coffee at nine o'clock at night because you're out hanging out with your friends and you just have to have something in your hand, that's completely
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okay because as long as you stay committed to yourself and to sobriety, you will succeed
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You have to recognize that every choice impacts your decision to be sober
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You cannot put yourself in situations until you are ready. You cannot be like, yes, I'll come to your wedding
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Oh yes, I'll come to your big birthday right in the beginning of your sobriety
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I know a lot of people that did not commit to being sober went to these Christmas parties
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went to these birthday parties and they weren't committed enough and they started drinking
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because they had to. They thought that they had to have alcohol in their hand when really they could have
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just had a Pepsi in their hand or a Coke in their hand or water in their hand
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It's all about the journey for you committing, making a decision in your life to stay committed
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to being sober. Every time you say yes to sobriety, you are saying no to the things that undermine it
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This step underscores the importance of conscious decision making in your journey, recognizing
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that every choice that you make impacts your path forward. Step seven, give back freely
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One of the most rewarding things about sobriety is being able to give back to people facing
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similar struggles. Sharing my stories, sharing my journey with you guys, this community, being so involved
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with you guys, it's helped me, I've helped you. It's just one big circle of everybody being able to give back to each other with every
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story that we share, with every journey, with every trial. We all just come together to help each other and I think that's the most important thing
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is just giving back freely. We're here to help each other. Don't let your sober journey stop with you
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Go help others. Get involved. Grow a community. Reach out to friends that are struggling that may want to stop
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Join this community. Comment on other people's struggling comments. We all are here to help each other
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Your story might just inspire somebody else to make the decision to quit drinking and
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change their life completely and give back freely. If you don't share your stories, as in giving back freely, you never know how many lives
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you actually can change. Your story might just change somebody's life, put them on the right path forward, and all
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because you decided to share your vulnerability and give back freely. As I reflect back on my seven months of sobriety, so much has changed in my life
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This community has grown. We've all been here to help each other and it's just absolutely amazing seeing everybody
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come together online from all over the world to give back freely and help one another
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push each other forward on their path of sobriety. Everybody is here to help one another and little me, like I will say, never expected
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to be here changing all of your lives. And with these steps, I really think have helped me
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There's no perfect way to get sober. It's just your mindset. You have to do it
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You have to commit to it. You have to be able to let go of things that are holding you back and just push forward
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I want to know from you guys what moment or experience was the most transformative in
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your sobriety journey. I don't know. Have you started yet? Are you started
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Have you been sober for decades? Maybe you can give input to help somebody else that was in your shoes at one point in time
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Thank you so much for being here. I am so much stronger because of all of you and I cannot tell you how much I appreciate
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you all
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