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flirting often gets a bad reputation
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it's sometimes seen as manipulative A
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sly attempt to excite someone with no
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genuine intention of intimacy think
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about the bitterness you might feel
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after a night at a party or nightclub
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when someone flirted with you but only
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flirted they left you wondering if there
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was potential for something more but
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this is just one unfortunate possibility
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of flirting at its best flirting is a
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vital social interaction that reassures
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and boosts confidence and self-esteem
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the goal isn't to stop flirting it's to
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refine it into an act of kindness and
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generosity what is good flirting good
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flirting is an imaginative celebration
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of someone's likeability emotionally and
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physically it's not about manipulation
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it's about noticing and celebrating
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what's most appealing in another person
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the art of good flirting involves
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balancing three seemingly contradictory
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ideas that you would love to sleep with
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someone that you won't and that the
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reason has nothing to do with any flaw
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on their part good flirting also
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recognizes an important truth about sex
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the most mean meaningful part isn't
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always the physical act it's the
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acceptance intimacy and vulnerability
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that underpin it knowing someone likes
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us enough to embrace us at our most
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vulnerable is what makes sex deeply
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meaningful skilled flirts know that this
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feeling can be conveyed without physical
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intimacy over dinner or a casual
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conversation they can share the essence
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of what makes connection meaningful
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using only words and they do this while
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framing rejection in a way that
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preserves dignity a good flirt knows
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that rejection can feel like a personal
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failure but but they also know how to
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loosen this harmful narrative they point
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to reasons for why sex might not happen
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like an existing partner an age Gap or
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workplace Dynamics none of which suggest
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personal inadequacy freed from the
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expectation that flirting must lead to
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sex good flirts open up a new realm of
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interaction they create a safe playful
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space to imagine connection without
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feelings of bitterness or inadequacy
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flirting in this way transcends social
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and economic divides a corporate lawyer
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and a shopkeeper a cleaner and a CEO it
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doesn't matter flirting becomes a way to
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find beauty in someone outside your
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usual sphere making it a touching and
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generous exchange why is flirting so
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important because it fulfills a rare and
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unmet need the chance to feel desirable
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rejection and self-reflection often
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teach us to see ourselves as far from
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ideal while this may be partly true it's
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not the full story a good flirt serves
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an important psychological role they
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remind us that despite our flaws we are
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still appealing in certain ways they
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restore balance to our s image showing
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us that we are worthy of admiration
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flirting counters the overly negative
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self-perception that often comes with
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maturity it can lift our mood make us
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more generous and improve our patience
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and these benefits shouldn't be confined
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to sexual relationships good flirting is
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a kind of Social Work It expands the
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chance to feel desirable Beyond physical
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intimacy it's a more democratic form of
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attractiveness sharing its benefits with
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many rather than a select few flirting
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is about kindness recognition and
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Imagination it's about making people
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feel seen and valued so let's not only
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appreciate good flirts let's strive to
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become them have you experienced
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flirting that made you feel truly seen
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or have you practiced the art of good
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flirting yourself share your thoughts in
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the comments below if this video
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