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I honestly need a new computer for better sound editing and a microphone so you can hear my beautiful voice
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If you are unable to do so I completely understand. Just sharing this podcast everywhere you can is so appreciated
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I truly appreciate you and let's do this. All Carol knew was rejection, molestation and violence as a child
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She thought she found the truth in witchcraft until the spirits turned on her
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abusive, dysfunctional. These are terms we hear quite a bit. But Carol, we have to come up with a new adjective to describe your home. Tell me about your mom
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My mother was probably one of the most violent women I have ever met. Sid, when the weekends would come, my mom and dad would drink excessively, and they would come home from bars 4 o'clock in the morning
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When I'd be lying in my bed and all the children in the house, because it was a large family of 10, and we lived in a little cracker box
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And at 4 o'clock in the morning, we would wake up as children almost like clockward
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We would just sit up in our beds because we knew any moment it was going to start
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And you see the lights of the car come up the driveway and mom and dad would come in And from the moment they walked through the door it was a rain of terror She would break everything I mean every dish out of the cupboard She would pick up beer bottles and smash him against the wall
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She would throw forks that would land in his chest. She would throw, I remember we had a gold glass ashtray, and it sailed through the air
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And us little children would come out of our bunk beds, and we'd come down to the end of the skinny little hall
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and we'd be screaming, no mommy, no daddy. And I would be shielding with my older brother and sister, the small children
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so they wouldn't get hit by the ashtrays. There would be things flying through the air, sit everywhere
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And then all of a sudden you'd see the red and blue light, which indicated that the police were coming
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And to us children, in the middle of that violence, it was almost like a peace sign
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because here would come the police up the driveway. And they'd knock on the door, and they'd come in
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They'd say, Mr. and Mrs. Thompson, that was my maiden name. Mr. and Mrs. Thompson, we come here every weekend
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The house would be a wreck. My mother's clothes would be ripped off. walking around exposed my father would have blood all over his face to be blood on
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the wall it was a terrible view I hate to say this but did you think this was
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almost the normal way to live or did you know know something was wrong I think
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for a long time ihrem we thought it was the normal way to live and then when you started going to other children house and you saw parents touching their children showing love toward their children Did they ever touch you and show love
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Sid, my memory of my mom, and this is the truth. When I was a little girl, we used to sit on the floor in the living room, they were like 10 of us
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in the small house again. And I'd be watching TV. And all of a sudden, on the clear blue sky in the dark from the couch, she'd come, I feel her
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hand swinging through the air. All you'd see is the wind and her fist would hit my mouth and the blood would
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just trickled down my face and my lips would blow up. My mom was so violent that one time I asked
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her if I could go to a baseball game or something with the kids in the neighborhood. And for daring
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to ask her why when she said no, she took, you know those squeegees you used to wash a windshield
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one side? You wash the other side, you rub it off at the rubber end. Sid, she beat me so bad
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till I was black and blue from my neck to my waist. And out of curiosity, what was her
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background that caused her to act like that. Did she have an abusive family? I guess she must have
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Yeah, she came as an illegitimate child out of three children. She never knew that the man who was
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raising her was not her daddy. One day he cornered her to beat her and she picked up a knife and
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threatened him. Don't you hit me. You're not my father. So she always felt that rejection that she
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wasn loved because she too was you know she lived in a family where she didn feel of So when she had these all these 10 children I mean my mother had children since she was 19 every single year she like a gerbil she had children every single year so here she was a young woman with nine
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children in this tiny little house and the only extra corrective activity was alcoholism now why didn't
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your father come against this my dad was mentally ill when my father was about 28 years old
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became very ill in his kidneys he went into the high in the hospital, he was about 35 to have an operation
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While he was there, they gave him an anesthetic. They had tried a brand new anesthetic on him
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Sid, it made him totally crazy. He dismissed himself from the hospital after the operation
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He came home. He started beating the children up, trying to choke my mother
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hanging himself in the cellar. One particular time when my mother had been out all night
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because my mom ran around all the time. She had a fare after affair
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In fact, out of all 10 children, it was believed that I was the only one who wasn't really my father's child
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that I was born out of one of her affairs. But one day, she was out all night with a man
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and my dad was home alone. And he was on a drug called Thorazine, and the reason he took that was because of his mental state
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And he would escape from mental institutions and come home. And this was one night he had escaped from the mental institution
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and was home, and she was gone all night with a man. Well, he had fallen asleep on the country
