00:00 - Introduction
01:36 - Charlotte & Tandem Breastfeeding
09:08 - Brooke & Lasering Her Baby
16:23 - Sara & Spicy Content Creation
24:26 - Alex & Being A Disabled Mom
32:42 - Leah & Waxing Her 3-Year-Old
40:07 - Cici & Breastfeeding With HIV
Show More Show Less View Video Transcript
0:00
I tandem breastfeed my five and two-year-old
0:03
My dream is to let my children decide when to stop. We get hate because we lasered our baby's face
0:09
He had his first laser treatment when he was five months old. We get judged for what I do for a living
0:14
It was my idea to start creating adult content. Trolls say I am not fit to be a parent because I am disabled
0:21
I've been called a bad mom for waxing my three-year-old, but I don't think I'm doing anything wrong
0:26
I've been called selfish for breastfeeding while living with each other. There is a lot of negativity surrounding breastfeeding
0:34
Feeding my children is going to turn them into serial killers. One person told me to put my child down
0:40
That we were horrible people, we shouldn't have kids. That hurt a little bit
0:46
I'm a bad mom or my husband has to deal with so much
0:51
People have even gone as far to make calls through child protective services
0:54
The viral video of me waxing bliss. It got crazy. Calling me a horrible mother
1:01
Calling me their first bully. You're a horrible person for taking it risk
1:07
How do you feel about Charlotte's recipe? Have you ever regretted your decision to get for a kid that's such a young age
1:15
Um... Do your children know what you do for your living? How do you explain it? Why do you continue to post on social media despite this kind of comment
1:24
One, two, three. How do you feel about Leah deciding to wax your daughter
1:29
I made a decision to breastfeed Zuri. How do they make you feel
1:36
My name is Charlotte and I tandem breastfeed my five and two-year-old. You want to break it
1:42
Can I do another one? You sure can. We can control whether or not we have positive or negative thoughts, right
1:48
I am a certified health and wellness coach. How many times you smile today, you can control that
1:54
Give it a good whack. There you go. You want to crack one, buddy? I want to help. Help
2:00
My oldest is Racium, and my youngest is Malachi. Oh, let's keep it in there. Eat
2:07
Oh, no. And a cup? No, no. How old are you? I'm five
2:15
Malachi is two. I love you so much. I love you, too
2:20
Who's better at cooking? Me. Is it mommy or daddy? Um. You still
2:28
Tell me about a typical morning in the home. Well a typical morning for us is we let our bodies
2:35
wake us up, we're blessed to work from home. We don't have alarms, which is a beautiful thing
2:41
Daddy, vegetables go to numbers. We can adjust our times to be able to sleep in
2:47
so we both sleep with our kids and we wake up around the same time
2:51
A typical morning starts off nursing together, getting breast milk, and then going to the kitchen to cook
2:58
Are you ready? Roaching! Slow mornings are our favorite. I always knew that I wanted to breastfeed
3:06
My experience with breastfeeding my daughter was not the easiest. She had something called torticollis
3:12
which is the shortening of the muscle in your neck. We struggled a lot, and we overcame that together
3:17
But what? Oh! Oh no! After the first four months, I was doing really well
3:22
And then just kept going from there. This child does not sleep, therefore mama doesn't sleep
3:27
How did you decide to do extended breastfeeding? I had this dream of doing full-term breastfeeding
3:32
where she would stop when she's ready. And I know that if the time comes where I'm ready
3:38
then we'll, of course, adjust accordingly. I really wanted another child. And as soon as I heard that it was possible
3:45
to breastfeed during pregnancy and even tandem breastfeed afterwards, It's just like something clicked
3:51
I loved it during pregnancy because I didn't have to chase a toddler around
3:55
Tandem breastfeeding is when you breastfeed multiple children, generally two. In my case, my kids are three years apart
4:02
You can either breastfeed them together at the same time or one at a time. My decision to tandem breastfeed was totally a God moment
4:08
because it was placed on my mind and my heart that that's something that I would be doing
4:12
I started tandem breastfeeding the day that I gave birth to my son
4:16
I knew that I wanted to try and to achieve a few months of it at least
4:20
This is like a guaranteed rest every day for a mom. There's another benefit
4:27
I would love to make it more well known that the benefits of breastfeeding don't stop at six months or at one year or at two years
4:34
Mom, watch this! There's nutritional benefits, there's behavioral benefits, emotional, social, and cognitive
4:43
I don't believe our kids get as sick as other kids do. I think they have a closer bond because of our decision to tandem breastfeed
4:54
You know, they sit still for a while and stare at each other in the face. In the beginning, they would hold hands while they tandem breastfed
5:00
Man, that's a heartwarming moment for a mother. My dream is to let my children decide when to stop
5:05
At one point, I thought maybe he would wean before she did, which would have been kind of wild
5:10
But I also know that when either party is ready, there needs to become a mutual understanding and agreement
5:16
But it doesn't look like there's any stopping anytime soon. The current parenting style that I identify with most is secure attachment parenting
5:29
Can you hold it up? Hold it up. There you go. Can I hold that
5:35
Watch this! You respond to the needs of the child. I see green and green and green and more glory
5:44
But you also give them space to explore. Am I the umbrella holder? Yeah
5:49
Do I look like an umbrella holder? Yeah. It aligns with my motherly instincts
5:55
It's a balance that maybe not everyone understands or agrees with, but it works for me
6:01
How do you feel about Charlotte's recipe? I find that it works really, really well, in fact
6:05
I trust her judgment. I think there's hardships with everything, but parenting is being there for our kids
6:13
I started sharing my breastfeeding journey online because there was just a lack of support and a lack of community out there for breastfeeding moms
6:20
Not that I could find at the time. And I also wanted some support as my daughter had such struggles latching
6:27
The majority of my comments and encouragement that I receive is positivity
6:32
But for every positive person, there seems to be a negative person. Not quite a ratio of 50-50, but there is a lot of negativity
6:40
Why do you still let your kids breastfeed at their age? It just seems unhealthy
6:44
Your kids will be too dependent. Oh, if you look up secure attachment, there's a reason why we do what we do
6:52
If the kids know that their needs are met, you get a sexual pleasure from it and justify
6:57
it with parenting. That's, wow, that's so sad. She's doing it for her benefit and not the kids, and that's absurd because they don't have the understanding or knowledge
7:08
Why should we so feed them until they're ready for marriage? I can't even, I have nothing to say to that
7:15
There's been comments where people say, just give her a sippy cup. And I want to say, are you coming over to wash the sippy cup
7:25
Because this is a lot easier than washing dishes and bottles A gal said what going to happen when these children grow up and they look back and see these images that you shared on your social media
7:36
You know, what are they going to think? And I said, well, they're going to be empowered. Woo! Wow
7:44
That's truly how I feel about that. I haven't had anybody come up to me and try to scold me, but..
7:49
Where's yours? some looks here and there, more shock than disgust. And then I get comments like, you are an amazing mom
7:59
I think it's a wonderful bond you have with your kids. You're doing a great job, mama
8:03
Oh my God. Oh yeah, look at mama go. And if I can help just one person
8:10
then that's enough for me. I continue to share my journey because it's ever changing
8:17
I want to knock it over. And I went from feeding just one to two
8:22
And it's probably the most important and beautiful thing I've done to date
8:27
I want to continue my journey. So if a mom wants to continue to breastfeed
8:31
I hope that my journey inspires them to do so. I've never known a high school kid
8:40
to still be breastfeeding or a college kid. So one day my children will stop breastfeeding
8:45
and maybe go on to have children in a family of their own. I hope that they can look back on what mom did
8:51
and be inspired and proud as she shared her journey with integrity and love to support other moms
8:57
Two, three, go! We love going to the beach
9:11
especially during summer on the weekends. We love going on long drives
9:15
We like to go away, take the kids to theme parks. My name is Brooke. I am 34 years old
9:23
I'm Keelan Wallace. I'm 28 years old. We've been together for almost five years and we have two babies together
9:32
Our daughter is Armani and she's three and our son is Kingsley and he is 16 months old
9:39
Armani's the most energetic out of the two. Definitely, yeah. Kingsley's coming up
9:43
Like, he's slowly getting there, but he can't walk yet, so Amani's definitely the more hyperactive one
9:50
We're a good team. Yeah, he thinks he's the boss. He knows who the boss is, but, you know, we're a good team
9:58
Oh, where are you going? Hey, hey. No. My pregnancy with Kingsley was even better than my pregnancy with Amani
10:08
There was nothing to alert us that anything was wrong. It was smooth sailing right up until we had him
10:16
If you want to sit up, you can. Mummy's just got to put this on. Ready
10:21
Wow. Instantly, the moment he was born, they knew it was a birthmark
10:28
but we didn't know what type yet. And then we got the confirmation that day
10:33
that it was a port wine stand birthmark. And then obviously later on
10:38
we found out about the Sturge Brothers Syndrome. When we started Googling, that's when I started getting concerned
10:44
because of the type of birthmark it was and the pictures that are in Google Images
10:49
scared the hell out of us. So it would affect his eyesight
10:57
It could be linked to Sturge-Weber syndrome, which then would be neurological issues
11:05
There's also the complications in the future with the port wine stain birthmark itself
11:11
where it can develop growths, vascular blebs, where it can bleed out and the face becomes disportioned
11:19
Yeah, there was quite a few issues. He had his first laser treatment when he was five months old
11:24
It was probably one of the most difficult decisions I've ever had to make. Were you scared when Kingsley went through his laser treatment
11:31
Absolutely scared. I was, as a parent, like, it was one of the hardest things
11:37
that I've ever had to kind of go into. I couldn't stay in the room
11:43
I actually left the room, whereas Dad was in there with him. But everything in me just broke
11:49
Did Kingsley need to have laser surgery? There are a lot of parents that choose not to
11:54
A lot of people think we're going to give, like let our child make that decision when they're older
12:00
Have you ever regretted your decision to get treatment for Kingsley at such young age
12:04
during during the process yeah yeah we had moments um when he was crying that like we were
12:16
like we don't want to do this again and like by the fourth one it was kind of like do we go again
12:22
or not it yeah the whole thing was difficult but would we regret it absolutely not we didn't want
12:30
to wait, we wanted to do it then and there, and then he won't remember
12:35
It'd be a lot more stressful when he's older than when he was a baby
12:38
After the laser treatment had stopped, and it looked really painful, I feel like it looked worse than how he felt
12:46
because he was fine afterwards, he was happy. Yeah. Are you sharing
12:54
Oh. So I was already on TikTok. So when Kingsley was born and we were really kind of taken back with everything
13:07
we had no clue what this was. I felt like I needed to put my son's story out there to spread awareness around it
13:15
You have been asking on my son's birthmark and the year of hell that we have had
13:21
If it's not a birthmark, then what is it? he has what they call George Weber syndrome
13:28
I had a lot of other parents of Port Weinstein children just come up to me and message me and thank me
13:34
and be like, thank you for sharing your story. This means a lot to my child
13:38
I had a lot of families say, this has helped me, made my decision easier
13:43
Then I had the negative side. One person told me to put my child down
13:47
Other people say, you're an abusive parent and you shouldn't be doing this to your child
13:53
that we were horrible people, we shouldn't have kids, social welfare should come take our children
14:00
he should make the decision for himself when he's older. Yeah, there was a few hurtful comments
14:05
and at the beginning it used to get to me a lot, but I chose rather than react to educate them
14:11
and if they don't want to be educated, to block. Hi. Hello
14:21
How are you? Good, good, good. Our families were, they supported us to have the, to decide on doing laser for him
14:30
What are you doing? Who's that? Is that Nanny? You want to go to Nanny
14:35
When I heard that Kingsley was getting laser surgery, I knew that it was for his best interest
14:42
I know his parents are doing the best they can and what's best for him
14:46
And it's when he goes to school. It's all those things. People can be pretty cruel
14:53
People don know the real story They only just see things written up but they actually don know the reasons behind it Worst thing that we would have had said is just saying that like I a horrible mum
15:08
We're child abusers. Just the abusive part really kind of got to me
15:12
because you know we love and care for our kids so that hurt a little bit
15:22
He's smiling. I just feel they judge people. You're always going to get that
15:30
I would have made that decision to have him have the laser treatment without a doubt
15:35
How do you feel about the way he looks now? I feel like he's always looked great
15:40
Like, it's still there. His birthmark is always going to be there. It's just purely to make the skin healthier
15:47
And obviously, in the same time, it is going to lighten it
15:51
But he's beautiful. I love him. I love him. I think he's got this beautiful little head
15:56
Remember, people are always going to give you criticism, especially if you put it out there online
15:59
but don't take it in too much. Don't take it to heart
16:03
Make decisions based on the best choices you think are for your children
16:08
What does the future hold for you as a family? Keep spreading awareness for our son's conditions
16:12
Yeah, just keep going up from here, I guess, and educating ourselves
16:16
and just making sure our children have the best life. Welcome to our home
16:25
We're in the process of moving, so excuse the boxes, but come on in
16:29
So while I'm packing, I found so many things that I didn't remember I had or thought I lost
16:37
What did they do in Anchorman? I was like, blah, blah, blah, blah. I don't know, brown cow
16:42
I don't know, brown cow. I don't know, brown cow. I'm Sarah Blake, and I'm an adult content creator
16:47
I'm Matt Cheek, and I'm a house husband slash manager. We have four kids. Chandler is 11, Camden is 10, Corey just turned 8, and Carson is 4
16:59
We got rid of most of everything, like all of our furniture, and we gave it away, and we're starting over
17:07
All right, I think we are almost ready for Vegas. So in our past episode, we were banned from our kids' football organization
17:16
I'm an OnlyFans model. I was banned from my kids' football games, their cheerleading games because of what I do for a living
17:25
Once everybody knew it was free game to ban us from one thing, they started banning us from everything
17:30
It's a huge reason why we're getting out of here and going somewhere where hopefully those things don't happen
17:37
The judgment has, I think it's gotten worse because people knew they could do things to our family and it affect our kids
17:46
I started creating adult content in 2020, so now for four years
17:52
Whose idea was it to start creating adult content? It was Matt's idea. He wanted to see me naked all the time. No, I'm just kidding
17:59
It was my idea to start creating adult content. But it came from your social media fans
18:05
People asked for it, yes. We do this. And then so we kind of started looking into it
18:09
And she's like, are you cool with that? And I'm like, I'm down with that. I am getting ready to shoot content
18:19
So I'm doing my makeup, just touching it up. Are you doing like swimsuit stuff today or bedroom stuff or
18:25
This dress. Well, the dress is okay. Okay. I have this one
18:32
Yeah. Yes. What, Jean George? Okay. I'm going to go put this on
18:37
And I will be right back. How do you help Sarah with her content
18:41
We have like a shared app where we do our schedules and everything. I'll fill it out every day
18:46
Like, you know, work out, come home, planning time with me. As soon as she gets the messages or whatever from people requesting whatever
18:54
she'll tell me, I'll put that in the calendar. Hey, you have to do this at this time or you have to have this done by that time
19:01
What do you think? I love it. Yay! I love it. Yeah
19:07
Okay. The texture's nice. Are you ready? Four. To get some good angles
19:14
Every day is a lesson in photo angles. Okay, let me see
19:21
So, see, this is the hard part for me. I gotta watch this and see these angles in that
19:26
Not up top right there, but below on that one. Go back around
19:33
Do you find yourself in these positions often? It keeps me, keeps me nimble, you know
19:40
Making adult content makes me feel empowered because it gives me the freedom to be a better
19:45
mom, a better wife, and making content that is so in tune with your body and things of
19:51
that nature, it's just powerful. Monthly, I make about 50 grand. So despite the judgment we face, I still continue to do this work because this is what puts
20:01
food on the table. and I think it's absolutely insane to think that somebody would quit their job because other people are uncomfortable with it
20:09
Normally I'm cooking something for the kids, but since we're moving and we've got so much going on
20:14
there's not a lot of time for that today. Dishes and everything are packed up. So we're having some pizza today. Cam, Chandler, come here, get your stuff
20:21
This is Camden. Carsey, we welcome everybody. There you go. Be careful
20:30
So our roles in the household are managing chaos together. We share the household chores
20:44
I probably do the majority, but gosh, she's better at it than I am
20:51
At being a house husband? At being a house person. Okay, who wants a brownie
20:56
Brownie. I just happen to be the one that has the time, so I'm kind of taking on that role
21:04
So, who's the better cook, mom or dad? I think mom. I think it's dad
21:11
You think it's dad? Sarah and Matt, do you agree with those answers
21:15
Yeah, I'd say it's probably split, 50-50. Mom's spaghetti. What does it taste like
21:21
What does it taste like? A noodle with water and water. I agree, bud
21:29
Do your children know what you do for a living? How do you explain it to them? Our children don't know exactly what we do for a living
21:37
I would say that they have an idea. We've been very secretive in that, I guess, sheltering them because we do do this for a living
21:47
We know what's out there on social media. We know how it can impact them in a negative way because of how society portrays us
21:57
So what does your mom do for work? She's a model. What she does for work is she is a TikTok, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, or X, whatever you want to call it, influencer
22:10
I don't really worry that this has negatively impacted my children because they've taken parts of my job
22:17
Not the adult stuff, but my daughter helps put together outfits for TikToks for me and she'll take pictures of me
22:24
Alright guys what are we doing on Friday We moving to Vegas for three days It a three day Well three days for the drive Daddy has a he gonna set up a TV in his car
22:37
Oh, we're gonna have a cool car. Mommy bought books for us, she bought a cooler. Dad got a TV, mom got books
22:45
There is a huge stigma surrounding what I do for a living
22:49
and it's directly targeted at the woman. There are so many men creators that don't have to deal with the things that I have to deal with as a mother, as a woman, as a wife
22:59
Me for one. Yes. We're both involved in it. Nobody treats me differently, but they treat her differently
23:05
I feel like I've been judged by this community for what I do for a living. Some examples of what people have said to us are that I'm seeking attention, that I'm a bad mom, or my husband has to deal with so much because I do this for a living
23:20
Well, what did you expect? Of course your kids are going to get picked on for you doing that
23:24
How about you teach your kid as a society, all of us, not to pick on anybody for anything
23:30
Let's not bully people. We're doing this to spend time with our kids and to be better parents, less stressed financially
23:37
We can provide for them better. We're removing ourselves from this situation and we're going to try to move somewhere where it's not such a big deal
23:44
It's not the talk of the town. You know what I mean? I hope the move to Las Vegas brings us happiness, peace, opportunity, a way to have all of our dreams come true and the kids to be more happy
23:57
Well said. I am so pumped up about this move. I am excited
24:04
I cannot wait. I'll be excited when we hit the road. I don't see any changes to my career
24:09
We just got to invest in great doctors, great surgeons. Then you won't be in the granny category
24:15
Oh yeah, well I could be a hot granny, hot young granny, cougar, you know
24:22
You guys can go inside. Okay. Okay. This one's cute. That one's my favorite
24:28
It's a little romper. Little romper. Our daughter's name is Ari and she's four months old
24:36
She's a preemie so she's very tiny, but she has a huge personality
24:42
She is beautiful. She's beautiful. Let me give you a kiss. Noah and I have been dating for over a year now, and we met on a dating app
24:55
We did not plan on being pregnant. All the way out, all three of them
24:58
So yes. It was a complete surprise. It was definitely a huge lifestyle change for us, but we are enjoying every minute of it
25:08
I have a rare neuromuscular disease called spinal muscular atrophy type 2
25:13
I have a defect on one of my genes where my body isn't receiving enough protein to make my muscles kind of work
25:24
Noah is one of my main caregivers and day to day he helps me with every aspect of my care
25:31
He helps me prepare food, he helps me shower, he helps me go to bed at night, he helps me clean
25:38
He does my hair sometimes. Yeah. My pregnancy experience was one of the hardest things I have ever done, but I have this little
25:49
beautiful lady and it was such an amazing experience. I did have to do a few extra things
25:55
because I'm disabled and pregnant. I had to go to the doctor once a week towards the end of the
26:02
pregnancy just to monitor everything. We're about to have this baby. When I first saw Ari, it was one of the most amazing things in my entire life
26:15
My doctors were, Alex, we have no idea how you got up in your wheelchair hours after this C-section
26:22
That was super intense for someone with my disease. And went to that NICU and saw her
26:30
When I first saw Ari, it was amazing. She was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen
26:34
It's a magical moment. Is there anything only either of you do for Ari
26:41
Nova does a lot of stuff for Ari that I don't do for her because he is physically able to
26:49
such as change her diapers, pick her up out of her crib
26:54
We do have an assistant that helps us take care of Ari and the house and me as well
27:00
Nina, and she is amazing. Thank you very, very much. Are we going to go for another two ounces
27:09
The products that I use to ensure that I'm involved with Ari's care is this changing table right here
27:18
We have it up on the table so that my wheelchair is able to access her
27:23
And this is how I feed her. This is how I play with her. I also use a wrap
27:32
I know. You're getting ready for a burp. Dad, we need a birth, please
27:38
Some misconceptions that people had about me being disabled and pregnant was that Ari was going to be born with a disability of some sort
27:47
or that I was going to die during pregnancy. There was a lot of misconceptions
27:55
and Ari does not have the same genetic disease as me. Ari is not disabled
28:01
We have a lot of nicknames for her. Beef Hamlet, Beefcake, Fartcake, Tootie
28:08
None that have to do with her actual name. Trolls say I am not fit to be a parent because I am disabled
28:18
The negativity kind of had its peak during my pregnancy. Since Ari has been born, it's kind of just continued to go down that path
28:31
just negativity about us as parents and just basically anything we do with her is wrong
28:40
People have said some awful things to us since Ari has been born
28:45
Someone commented, I feel so bad for him because he has to take care of two people now
28:52
He looks like he is not ready. People make comments about me being a caregiver
28:57
and caring for Ari as well. They basically say like, oh, you have to care for two people now
29:02
You're not going to be able to do it. It's going to be too much for you. Like, oh, you got to wipe two butts
29:07
How does it make you feel? I don't really care. It doesn't really bother me
29:14
Someone said when she is old enough, she has to care for you
29:19
So people assume that she's going to be my caregiver because I gave birth to a non-disabled child
29:26
and that's just a very common misconception that obviously isn't true. There's no plans of like, oh, I have an able-bodied daughter
29:36
She's going to be like my caregiver. Like, no, I'm her mom
29:40
Like, I'm her caregiver. These comments can be a little upsetting when it's directed towards her daughter
29:47
versus like it's not as hurtful when it's directed towards us. People have even gone as far to make calls to Child Protective Services
29:55
So it was very frustrating to have people in my home asking me invasive questions just because I'm a disabled parent on the internet
30:07
I'm sharing our lives. It was a very hard thing to navigate with a new baby and being new parents
30:13
but we eventually got through it and obviously all the cases were unfounded
30:19
Why do you continue to post on social media? I continue to post on social media despite these
30:25
comments because I am dedicated to breaking stigmas about disability and being a parent
30:33
Alex isn't going to let those hate comments bring her down. She's just going to keep going
30:37
That's going to inspire her to go even further. Originally we were supposed to do this pineapple
30:41
getup, but we decided on this one. My choice was demoted? Okay. Well
31:12
All right, they're runaway buggies. When we're out in the public, we don't really outwardly experience any judgment
31:26
because no one's going to come up to us saying, I hate comment, you know, people don't say that stuff to your face
31:33
We're just like any other parents. We just have a different dynamic. Do you like to have more children
31:40
We do want to have more children. Yeah. We do want to have more children, definitely
31:45
I don't know if I'm gonna go through with physical pregnancy again
31:50
That was a... It could be a surrogacy, could be an adoption, but we'll see
31:54
We'll have another one. We want another one for sure. That's all I know
32:00
I'm just so fortunate and happy that I have the opportunity to be
32:05
this gorgeous little lady's mom, and that despite everything medical professionals telling me this is going to be really risky
32:16
And everyone doubting me and Noah that we did it. And we're just so lucky and happy to be a family
32:27
This experience has been amazing. And I'm so happy I've gotten to do it with you
32:32
And I'm excited for many more years with you and Ari. Me too
32:37
I'm so excited. A typical day in the Garcia house is work, the kids, and whatever it is that they got going on
32:50
School, sports, gymnastics, cheer, cleaning, cooking. It's a madhouse every single day
32:58
She claims that she does all the work and I just drive them around, but I guess I'm a professional chauffeur
33:05
My name is Leah Garcia. I am 31 and I am a realtor slash content creator
33:11
I've been married to Leonard for nine years. I have four children. I've been called a bad mom for waxing my three-year-old
33:17
But I don't think I'm doing anything wrong. I had a really good upbringing
33:23
I got teased for being hairy, so I was always pretty insecure about that
33:28
Being hairy was embarrassing. Not being able to shave or having more hair than the boys, it was just humiliating
33:36
Somebody was going to bring up how hairy I was in elementary school. I didn't need to wait till middle school to get bullied. It started at a very, very, very young age
33:47
I actually remember being even younger, like before school age, and adults would comment on how thick my eyebrows were
33:56
I wasn't supposed to be able to remove any body hair till I was 15, but I would go behind my parents' back and I would pluck my eyebrows or shave my eyebrows
34:06
The hair on my arm, I used to turn on the gas stove and I would run my arm across the fire so it would burn off my hair
34:15
So I found ways around it. I decided to wax my daughter's eyebrows because it's a quarter inch of hair and removing that would solve years of trauma
34:28
And so I removed it and I'm going to continue to remove it. I waxed Bliss for the first time when she was two
34:36
Bahati was about three or four. How do you feel about Leah deciding to wax your daughter In the beginning I questioned it a little bit I kind of thought like why would you wax my daughter It was a joint decision that we made together but it took a little bit of explaining
34:57
Like, I needed to have the backstory before I agreed to it
35:01
I asked Bahati if she wanted to get waxed. With Bliss, Bliss would always see me wax Bahati's eyebrows
35:07
So she asked me several times. Obviously not because she was aware that she had a unibrow
35:12
but just because she wanted to do what Big Sister does. So her unibrow was a little more pronounced than potties
35:19
So I was like, I'm going to have to do it eventually anyway. I might as well do it while she's asking
35:24
Do you think it's inappropriate to wax your children at such a young age? No
35:29
If you've ever had a unibrow, you understand the hurtful comments that can come from that
35:34
And so if I can take any of that away from them
35:38
and keep them from being exposed to the ugly part of that, then I will, no matter how much hate that it comes with for me
35:46
Why'd you put those on your lips? Ready? One, two, three. Ow, that honey
35:53
Ow, mom. That honey still. All right, girl, now you got two eyebrows
35:59
No more Florida's brow. I made the viral video of me waxing Bliss to bring awareness
36:05
and let parents know it's okay to wax. If your children want it removed, do it
36:12
You're not hurting your child, you're actually helping them. The online response from the video, it was a mix
36:19
There was a lot of people who were on board, and then there was a whole lot of people who didn't understand it
36:24
and who bashed me and sent hateful, evil comments, messages, emails, death threats
36:30
Like, it got crazy. People accusing me of injecting my kids with Botox
36:35
calling me a horrible mother. calling me their first bully, just horrible things like that
36:43
I think the worst one, I got a direct message of somebody threatening to cut my head off
36:49
if I didn't stop waxing her eyebrows. Because I already knew the backstory and I knew why we were doing it
36:56
I, of course, was offended, you know, got angered at a couple of the messages
37:03
I would much rather us get bass for it than for somebody to say something to my daughter and me feel like I have to go up there and defend, you know, her feelings
37:15
I do not regret posting that TikTok at all. I am unapologetically myself
37:22
I do not take back anything. That's who I am. My content on my TikTok is about me just being real
37:30
I'm not going to fake it. I got my waxes warm. This is for sensitive skin, so it's not going to hurt them
37:38
And then I just cut out the wax strips. And then these are the sticks that I use
37:49
We're ready to go. Bliss asked me, she sees me wax her big sister all the time
37:57
She sees me get waxed all the time. So she asked me several times before I finally said yes with Mahadi. I asked her if she wanted to
38:06
Turn this way light my girl's unibrow grows down. So I pull in the opposite direction and go up
38:17
Okay, I waxed sissy's eyebrows. Do you do you want me to wax your eyebrows? Yes. Are you sure? Give me sugars
38:24
I love you. Okay, let's do it. One, two, three
38:36
There you go. Good job. This is all of the hair that comes off
38:42
Just a little bitty piece of hair, no big deal, no tears, minimal pain, and no bullying
38:49
I would just like to say that I am not bullying my child
38:53
I am not forcing my children to wax their eyebrows. I am not causing pain
38:58
I am not causing insecurity. We have raised our children to know that they are beautiful and they are perfect
39:06
And removing a unibrow is no different than taking your child to get a haircut
39:12
It's no different than when you pierce your baby's ears. They don't know that you're piercing their ears
39:17
They didn't ask you to pierce their ears. They didn't say, Mommy, I want earrings. They're babies
39:22
They have never shed a tear over it. I'm doing this with the purest heart
39:26
because I genuinely care and I wanna protect my children. So if that makes me a bad mother then so be it I sure there things that you do that I would disagree with but I keep my opinion to myself and allow you to raise your own child
39:44
I will definitely continue to wax my daughter's eyebrows until they tell me to stop
39:49
If I had a message to the haters who disagree with my parenting style
39:53
I would say, good thing I'm not your mom. I am their mom, so their opinion is the only one that matters to me. Yay
40:01
Yay! Hey, y'all. Hey, mom. What
40:15
I am Cece, and I am a mom who is living with HIV
40:19
I have a son, Zion. He is 12 years old, and he is HIV negative
40:26
I have a partner, Duane, and we've been dating for about six years
40:30
We share a daughter and her name is Zuri. And she's also HIV negative
40:37
Child, Zuri. Zuri. Look, you sit right there, mommy wants it right here
40:44
I contracted HIV when I was about 19 years old. And it was from dealing with people in sexual relationships that I did not know their HIV status
40:55
Ew. I was 20 when I was diagnosed. When I found out that I was HIV positive, that was one of the most devastating moments of my life
41:07
Never thought that it would be me. So what do you say to somebody that's mad at me because I had you
41:14
Even though I took the medicine, I went to the doctor, I did all of that
41:18
What do you say to them? What I would say is don't judge
41:22
Look and go through my mom's story to actually get the full picture and see that she has actually done everything that she needed to do to make sure that me and Zori are negative
41:37
I did not breastfeed Zion. That was not an option at all
41:41
How far in your relationship did Cece disclose to you that she was looking like her shit
41:45
She disclosed me, like, almost right away. I believe, if not the first time we met, maybe the second time we met
41:51
She just kept it real being she was honest and I respected that
41:55
So that's how I was able to handle it and make my decision on how, like, once we go forward
42:02
Good job. You fed the turtles. Yay, high five. Good job. Mommy's so proud of you
42:11
This is my medicine. It is my lifeline. It has been what has allowed me to have kids who are not living with HIV
42:20
is what's kept me healthy for these last 15 years. It's what allows me to not be able to transmit HIV sexually to my partner
42:29
I depend on this. This medication is what makes me undetectable. Can you tell us about your decision to breastfeed Zuri
42:39
I made a decision to breastfeed Zuri. In those studies that we do have available
42:44
we've seen that the risk of transmission when the parent is on antiretrovirals, HIV medication
42:52
that the risk is less than 1% when you breastfeed. I breastfed Zuri for seven months
43:00
Aww. Hey, ma. Hey, my baby. Aww. Love you so. So when I got pregnant with Zuri
43:13
This time we are talking about breastfeeding, something that I never thought would be possible
43:22
You know, like I didn't even get the option with Zion. Now this comes on the table
43:27
How did that make you feel? I thought it was a good deal
43:33
I really did. You know, I know that your providers had your back and I believe what they said
43:41
So I didn't worry about that at all. I knew that that breast milk would be the best for her
43:48
Well, I worried enough for the both of us. I worried the whole nine months
43:54
I worried every time I put my breast into her mouth. I hate that you worried like that
44:00
You didn't express that when you were pregnant or when you were breastfeeding her
44:06
I thought you were okay with it, being that you were doing it
44:10
In the middle of me breastfeeding, Zuri, there was a shortage of milk because there was contaminated milk floating around
44:18
And I remember the thought of oh my goodness my breast milk is probably the safest thing I could be doing for my baby right now even while living with HIV
44:30
You know, it's not sweet. What? It's the way that them people act on the internet
44:35
I know, and I wish that I could change that for you because you still have so many people that don't know
44:41
that don't have a clue of what HIV is. Even in 2023, I learn a lot from you
44:49
I think we do as a family, and we thank you. Yeah, because y'all love me
44:53
Yes. And HIV is just a part of me. Yes. So I'm grateful for y'all recognizing it and still continue to love me
45:01
because then it just helped me keep it going. Because y'all ain't never treated me no different
45:06
Nobody ever treated me no different. No. I'm so grateful. I love you
45:12
I love you, too. I know you do. I decided to share my story online with others for the first time on December 1st, 2018
45:22
I wanted to get it out and find somebody else. I wanted to find community
45:28
And in that blog, Healing is Voluntary, it's the acronym HIV. And I was tired of it meaning human immunodeficiency virus
45:36
As a woman who is living with HIV and who is extremely open with my status
45:41
and extremely proud and open with the fact that I have kids
45:46
I have received a lot of negative feedback from the people online
45:50
While I have children knowing that HIV was going to pass down to them
45:55
the kids didn't stand a chance. That comment was not true at all
45:59
Clearly on my video, this video specifically, I said that my kids were both HIV negative
46:08
What is like the most common piece of judgment you receive? That I was selfish for having children, that I was selfish for breastfeeding one
46:17
and that feels like the opposite of what I have been feeling and experiencing
46:23
You're a horrible person for taking that risk. If you're putting your child at risk, you are selfish
46:29
Go ahead and educate yourself. No baby should be at risk of contracting HIV just because it's a selfish decision of a mother
46:36
who clearly doesn't understand her child is first. I just got to add something, Kevin. I'm sorry
46:46
Sure, go for it. What really confuses me about this all is that we live in a country
46:51
who has threatened the sexual and reproductive health rights of women, period
46:56
So they say you have to keep the baby. But is that only if you're not living with HIV
47:02
Because it seems that my decision to keep my children and to raise my children
47:07
And to love my children is what gets me the most hateful, negative comments
47:13
So what do you want me to do? Do you want me to keep the babies
47:16
Do you want me to love the babies? Or should I throw that away because of a less than 1% chance of transmission when I end up pregnant
47:26
It's the willful ignorance that really gets me. You could try to give somebody the correct information sometimes and they still only hear what they want to
47:35
I've received so many positive responses as well. The medical providers will tell me that they refer their newly diagnosed women to my Instagram page
47:46
Or I have a person thank me for doing the hard work because this is the hard work
47:53
So the Well Project is a non-profit organization. It serves women and girls living with HIV across the gender spectrum and those that are vulnerable to it
48:02
My role of program manager, I get to attend conferences that are related to HIV and AIDS
48:09
I get to go there, learn the information, and bring it back to my community
48:14
I get to communicate and meet so many different women from so many different walks of life
48:21
and HIV being the thing that we share. Man, I get to do my life work every day
48:26
What I hope for my family is that I'm raising two children that know how to use their voice
48:34
and that take space up in the world and that fight for what they really truly believe in
48:40
One thing that I would like to tell the world is that for people living with HIV
48:45
that is just a part of our identity. We have so many other facets and things going on
48:52
HIV is just a small, small part


