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🔴The Strange World Of Justice League Abridged Reaction! | Zelda Reacts
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Jun 15, 2025
Reaction Requested by @esdeath. Originals by @TheUndeadHumor https://patreon.com/thezeldazone https://zelda.zone/discord Watch my other react streams: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLlxZek2EIxkkgGKUyvs0huueWQetHVM3- 👋 Hi, I'm Zelda! 🖖 Subscribe for Chill Vibes, Cats, Gaming Livestreams, and 3+ videos a week featuring underrated gems! I play unique games almost every day! Join the channel for something new, fresh, and high quality every week. Personal favorites are anything unique or surreal and artsy, stuff that makes you think. And anything funny. Humor is essential. I read all my comments, so leave something nice! 🔗 Links & Social 🌐 Join our Discord Server: https://zelda.zone/discord My site for game guides & articles: https://zelda.zone/ ❤️ Support The Channel 💸 Get chat emotes & more as a Channel Member: https://youtube.com/@TheZeldaZone/join Monthly benefits on Patreon: https://zelda.zone/patreon 🕒Chapters🕙 Comment a timestamp if I missed something! Justice League Abridged 0:00
View Video Transcript
0:00
by the way the first video is Let's explain our powers to each other um the first video is gigantic it's an hour and
0:08
eight minutes so this is just going to be a one video stream all right so it's like
0:14
right it's it's it's right around here in Justice League versus Satan okay so because teamwork I like teamwork let's
0:21
explain our powers to each other why because teamwork i like teamwork teamwork so I love that the Batman ones
0:27
with um So can everyone else I have quick reflexes so does everyone else and I can time travel [ __ ] it's true
0:33
well there's with the bad Batman villains we'll see how good this is is everybody was this much smoother this
0:39
time batman you can't fire flash i just did next i'm a green lantern you don't
0:44
look green batman is the only good DC batman is the only good DC hero i'm sorry they can also create an energy
0:51
construct of anything I imagine what do you imagine hammers and stuff what about a bat-shaped hammer i've never imagined
0:57
that or a bat-shaped sword can't say that I have or a bat-shaped gun which shoots bat-shaped bullets you really
1:02
like bats don't you i don't think batshaped bullets would fly very well god damn it Batman next i am Hawk Girl i
1:08
could have put that together i have wings bird wings are mid why does she look like [ __ ] Wolverine i hate Girl you just like bash people skulls in with
1:14
that we're trying to keep things peaceful why is
1:20
Where is second audio oh my god i hate you could you maybe like brutally
1:25
murder people you're fired next i am Martian Manhunter one of the last guy i
1:31
forgot to bring my tiny violin that's not cool batman I can shape shift deviant with you that's like several
1:37
other people saying telepathy telekinesis invisibility is he still listing off his super he's almost as
1:43
busted as me that's what I don't like about DC it's more common than you think please spare me the star the destruction
1:50
of Krypton isn't I can also phase through objects i didn't consent todd you're fired next wonder Woman not a
1:56
very original name your name's Batman please continue i'm a demigod god isn't real i wield the lamp and the bracelets
2:03
of submission fun with you Batman for the love of And I possess divine wisdom granted to me by
2:09
the Greek gods you take tips from the guy who ate his wife how dare you insult my father i quit well looks like it's
2:15
just you and me Superman why should I let you stay in the Justice League after what you've just done because I'm stupidly rich fair enough let's save the
2:21
world stay with me Batman getting mauled by a space dog wasn't on my to-do list today i'm bringing the Justice League
2:27
back together fine but don't tell Flash you carried me like a baby does Baby have a boo boo shut up Flash i like soda
2:33
soda's for poor people lattes are poor people batman for the love of just how rich are you he's probably a millionaire
2:39
do I look poor a billionaire perish the thought you're scaring me Batman you really want to know then let me break it
2:46
down for you my wealth is like a bat signal impossible so the phrase break it down has been completely ruined for me
2:51
why okay my bank account has its own gravitational pull that seems unlikely if my riches were a superhero they'd be
2:57
Superman thanks buddy only without the weakness to pink rocks i retract my thanks my investments are as individual
3:03
as Diana's bracelets literally or figuratively i could buy Mars is that legal the vast is filled with the blood
3:09
of unicorn startups batman what the [ __ ] are you talking about shut up Flash you're not making any sense you've just
3:14
been making a bunch of ridiculous analogies it's like Chat GPT wrote your answers who the kid's right you crazy as
3:20
hell fine then how about I just tell you who I'm richer than willy Wonka may have a chocolate river but I have a bat
3:26
thanks i hate AI made on the backs of slaves batman you can't use the sword or we'll get cancelled are you that much of
3:32
a joke Clark while Richie Rich is counting his pocket change I'm counting the zeros in my network i have numbers
3:39
before the zeros and while Scroo is hoarding coins I'm investing in the future and the future
3:45
is juicy roast duck with orange sauce and bat-shaped veggies you eat birds as a vegetarian this offends me i find it
3:52
hard to believe that you're a vegetarian considering you grew up on a remote island of hunter gatherers manplaining
3:58
pardon the tooth fairy leaves coins under pillows i leave batarangs toy batarang right i'm not Santa i'm way
4:04
richer than you santa isn't real goddamn mouth well now you all know how rich I am actually we don't it's still unclear
4:11
let's just say I'm stupidly rich how did you acquire your vast wealth isn't it obvious crypto invest in today what what
4:18
does this is is not financial advice if you're bored you're probably [ __ ] with money and we'll [ __ ] it up what was that i said bats are cool what what the [ __ ]
4:23
does Wayne Industries even do like it's just like a generic everything industry like [ __ ] Tony Stark and I got five
4:30
off eBay last week they just like do things i bought it on Tuesday i'm going to see how much it sells for on Amazon
4:36
you're a monster the missiles are coming did that ape just talk i'm not sure I can stop it you want to make military
4:42
weapons really want me to throw money at it i want you like Wayne Enterprises why didn't you put your I guess it would
4:47
make sense for Batman Alfred to come here and slowly move these rocks for me there's no point Batman his arthritis
4:52
isn't that bad she's dead like the dodo why'd you pick a bird it was the first thing that came to mind it was
4:58
insensitive it could have been worse as dead as your useless Mars family I see the point i wish I could help you Batman
5:04
don't you have super strength i really wish I could help you enterprise kind of sounds like she's still alive those are
5:09
the sounds of her tortured soul escaping her body maybe if I move this rock it'll help so now that Wonder Woman's dead
5:14
does that make me the Justice League's alpha female it makes you our only female i'll take that as a yes a zombie
5:20
stay away from my money i live [ __ ] and I took that personally the hairless ape saved us i identify as a bat what's that
5:27
Batman that's my crotch that's dust on your hands were you trying to save me i like lifting heavy things and putting
5:32
them back down oh mama humans are good at that me if you like so this is how Batman dies death by Snoo pardon i said
5:39
let's go on a date so what are your interests bats and this is a lot smoother like switching streams right i I think this can work it's just like
5:46
this date is difficult listen princess we're just not compatible i'm a rich kid i should just be like laughing at things i shouldn't have to like do things while
5:52
streaming that's [ __ ] being poor is for poor people am I right tell me about your issues well my parents were murdered right in front of me when I was
5:59
a child so we're starting with that then i think Lex Luthther is richer than me i heard he has cancer he bought cancer i
6:05
mean that fast oh and the Batmobile has had an engine warning light for the past few months chad my my car permanently
6:12
has an engine warning light like the [ __ ] secondary air pump or something
6:19
died and I got like a secondhand replace or like a me when I was a child i didn't use the official thing you know what
6:25
they say about guys with big chins they have big socks that their parents were murdered right in front of them when
6:30
they were a child anyway um it works completely fine but the check engine light is permanently on and it like won't ever go off like how my parents
6:37
were attacked right in front of me and to like refix it again it'd be like $1,500 like I'm not doing that kill
6:43
everyone's parents if they kept staring at her i never knew Diana was crazy as hell preach it brother maybe that's what
6:48
happens when you grow up on an island full of women john that's kind of sexist i mean she didn't have a father figure growing up well I didn't have a father
6:55
figure either because my father was killed when I was So you two going on a second date dating in the team never works just look at me and hot girl
7:01
dating in the team never works i don't know what she sees in you well I'm stupid no that's a Green Lantern right name one thing it can't buy you're dead
7:07
parents you son of a I'm used to like ridiculous old Green Lantern i never knew the [ __ ] what the [ __ ] is the
7:13
[ __ ] Green Lantern power like why wonder Woman is just does [ __ ] i hate DC
7:18
heroes they just do [ __ ] your date was He's quite the dancer i'm telling Flash shut up Lantern where are we going like
7:24
the [ __ ] speed force he can go back in time cuz he's fast [ __ ] off and he can like heal people because he's fast
7:30
shut the [ __ ] up my ears are bleeding look out Wonder
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Woman that traffic light could have killed you i doubt it i'm as unacceptable as you
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i'm the man of steel i have no equal i'm basically a god i'm literally a god don't be silly Wonder Woman demigods
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aren't gods if we were to have a serious fight I would win copia much maybe we'll find out later excuse me i said I am
7:54
sick of the world of man i'm going back to my island superman's powers are so [ __ ] stupid there's one from like the
7:59
60s where he's like is pulling a bunch of planets in space on a chain like with
8:06
his teeth probably my friends have been turned into hideous statues i guess leaving the island was a big brain move
8:12
oh my Hippolita my mother Hippolita is a statue what could she have done to deserve i don't know any of this Wonder
8:17
Woman lore of manhating sexist who imprisoned me and my sisters on this island
8:24
i don't know if this is real and I I am forced to believe it undermined her authoritarian rule why am I sad again
8:30
because man man is bad nice throw needs Who the [ __ ] is this magical blasts that may turn you into a statue if you get
8:36
hit i should consider not getting hit how could I defeat an island of Amazonians yet wait wait wait why are they Greek they're [ __ ] Amazonians
8:43
why are they Greek i would certainly like to i know you would i can feel your anger it gives you f the Amazon
8:50
rainforest is not hurry it up with the Star Wars quote so that we can get to the part where I fight Superman do what
8:55
must be done what are these i am sending you on a fetch quest these stones shall guide you to items I want you to fetch
9:01
you will then return the fetched items to me thus completing the fetch quest do you have any other quests amazonian are
9:08
from family it will take an age to find the item oh it's right there in the most obvious wait so the rainforest is named
9:14
after statue will play no part in this scene now to carefully extract the item from the vase i should be a doctor you
9:21
break it you buy it then I pray you're not expensive that wasn't even funny no need to lose your head over it please
9:28
stop you should leave the jokes to Flash do you want us to get cancelled if it means we can skip your evil Wonder Woman
9:33
phase then sure it's not a phase and Amazonian emo says "What?" I asked "What are you doing?" I am on a fetch quest
9:38
amazonians aren't from Amazon they're Greek mythology figures with children how about Can we stop by that mall i
9:44
need to buy a comically sized suit fine these are meant to be clothes they leave very little to the imagination
9:51
they're much more dignified anyway please excuse me for a moment i need to turn into a drill
9:57
see [ __ ] [ __ ] DC heroes i hate this [ __ ] they can just do things turning into a drill you drill a massive hole in the
10:04
ground well yeah i was a drill expensive this will be to fix that's a Batman question it will take months of
10:10
construction listen Wonder Woman i literally just turned into a drill i taste blood in my mouth and I think I
10:15
have a concussion i don't really want to hear about your problems just give me the damn vase by the blinding light of
10:21
Apollo superman did you turn into a light bulb superman the whites of my eyes have burned away wait I never had
10:27
those best not to question it proportion monster i swear I'm
10:33
nasty aliens books my one weakness i knocked over my Why do I have a feeling
10:39
you said something offensive hopefully it didn't screw up my mind saying things i'm going to use my last intended to
10:44
brutally hang you in midair i thought this was a PG could you please die i know you this conveniently placed car
10:51
has broken my fall i don't I don't think cars break your fall by the way that's such a stupid comic thing why didn't he
10:58
dodge it's my turn to throw the car like nothing breaks your fall are you feeling shocked my funny bone is in pain
11:06
is this the end of Superman the water would look good though hair hasn't moved an inch despite a car exploding right in
11:12
my face and also after turning into a drill I miss being a drill also why is Wonder Woman stepping on me wonder
11:17
Superman catching a fallen person would make them explode yeah like my immovable hair leave me no choice Wonder Woman the
11:24
physics are very inconvenient oh wait i don't know how to do that it's almost as if I have an overreiance on my
11:29
superhuman strength speed and heat vision curse my superior genetics foul monster did you eat Superman what is
11:36
your gross sausage pointing at wow my outfit is pretty undignified oh Superman is that you i just want you to get spots
11:43
talk Superman you are hurt i'm not really that hurt whoever did this to you was clearly much stronger okay now must
11:50
have been embarrassing i snapped out of the illusion first so who's really the winner copia much shut up what does this
11:55
button do personal telekinetic field that sounds like the sort of [ __ ] that's I didn't do it and who did Satan
12:01
satan isn't real i wouldn't be so sure batman take a look at this that's just an unattractive man only a mother could
12:07
love my mother is dead this strange little man is called Faust and he's trying to free Hades hades nuts shut up
12:15
turned my mother into a statue why is Flash here flash has not done anything i know it's the aid version the statue
12:21
isn't on here what is on there bats money and if Fast opens the gates to hell then actually nobody Wonder Woman
12:26
or Superman have done anything blink if you're I guess Superman say Wonder Woman once but just as I thought she loves me
12:33
fast have you completed my fetch quest here is your extremely awkward to carry key excellent but first free my mother
12:39
she may say some crazy [ __ ] when she wakes up that's just a side effect of the magic mother his hands smell like
12:46
garlic what did you do got a Domino's while I was waiting by the way I'm going to turn you both to stone now dominoes
12:53
like cheesy bread things are great their pieces are terrible turn your head to the left i have They're not really worth the price thanks batman what the hell
13:00
are you doing attacking a middle-aged man we could have just killed him if Superman or Martian Manhunter made the
13:06
surprise attack you brought men to my island why are we helping her again synchronized superhero landing
13:12
prioritizing that landing over killing the evil necromancer was a good decision i think he's about to attack us let's
13:17
just stand here chatting until he Let's one v one Superman it'll take a lot more than an energy ball to defeat two energy
13:24
balls well that was surprisingly easy not so fast i could have attacked you but I'd rather announce myself and then
13:30
run away stop running away now that you've missed a few times I'm going to run directly towards you in See Flash I
13:35
would like Flash if his powers weren't [ __ ] what sorcery like if there wasn't speed force magic is this
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powerful he's not even in the right place Batman I'm scared how do we get him out the animators sent him to that I
13:46
guess they made evil flash to hoping no one would notice this lazy pace job they probably weren't paid enough you know
13:51
since they were poor kidnapping your mom if you don't mind by I do mind release me how about no please sorry but I can't
13:59
hear you over the sound of me opening the gates of hell alas I am returned I
14:04
put your ex-wife on a plate how could I ever love a monster like you how could I ever trust a monster like
14:12
you lord if I may be so bold I would very much like if it would please you i
14:17
like how he's just Superman but extremely emaciated i am old age is but a number for a god for you though it's
14:25
kind of like an egg timer i regret my life choices i'll save you mother
14:30
my daughter-in-law is dressed improperly either way I'd hit it wow so what do you
14:37
think of my opening attack not as good as mine so you just like punch things pretty much i mean I have heat vision
14:43
too when I remember to use it and x-ray vision he has so many visions you should only get one vision like [ __ ] off to me
14:50
seriously unless like you're a beholder [ __ ] after I got locked up huh it's over Hades jokes's on you i've got unlimited
14:57
abuse my arm's tired you don't deserve to be killed by my goatee
15:04
hey guys I speed forced my way out of that poorly drawn computer room did I miss much i hate this episode
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i remembered to use my heat vision so you're definitely Oh he's got frost breath i forgot about that one he's also
15:16
weak to magic cannon Batman they may have uncanned that but in the 60s they're like "All right." It sucks that
15:22
everyone has kryptonite let's make him weak to magic that's nuts all this free time you could pay your taxes taxes all
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Superman is [ __ ] but 60s Superman is particularly [ __ ] i'mma eat you i'mma destroy this heat the one X-ray
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vision that can only see Why didn't I place an army of undead around it i made poor tactical choices
15:41
mother are you okay i can't believe you also I love that island i'll take I mean it's kind of obvious cuz the name of the
15:47
episode but when there's a bizarro Jerry Seinfeld he's got a bizarro Superman Satan statue accept these gifts you're
15:54
the only gift I need dolphin because Jerry has a regular statue what gifts are we getting a golden tiara you chicks
15:59
probably love that sort of thing am I right stop acting like it's 2001 i am glad you defeated Hades before he made
16:05
me his bride he was going to take you back to the underworld and do horrible things yeah he really had the hots for
16:10
you the episode's literally called the Bizarro Jerry so like it's not very subtle about that but I swear to [ __ ]
16:16
God please take your crown brave champion i was already wearing it in the previous picture but sure i like a woman
16:22
what is that supposed to mean i mean I look like an adult female human who is capable of giving birth from puberty
16:27
until menopause oh my various gods slash what's wrong with you i thought Hades was the villain but it appears I was
16:33
mistaken i'm going to kill you in your sleep is that a synonym for stud muffin you
16:39
know what synonym means i was trying to impress a girl once but I accidentally said cinnamon she was a [ __ ] anyway
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it means you hate women they're the ones that hate me like pieces of meat that is a gross
16:52
exaggeration what about that time you went to get fast food these burgers are tasty but not as tasty as you you're a
16:57
pig i like soda took over the city it was just the one ape actually could you all please get
17:03
off my island i love you too Diana why for being friends with that red demon
17:09
flash isn't so bad once you get to know him he hates women how could I hate something I want to [ __ ] well we won't
17:15
be getting invited back there anytime soon you're a real piece of [ __ ] Flash what did the kid do this time he insulted half of the Earth sexism how
17:22
did you guess guys i'm not sexist being sexist is wrong maybe there's hope for you after all just give him a minute i
17:28
guess the trip was worthwhile if he learned something he should have already known that and being wrong is for women
17:33
there we go god damn it Flash you are a bad man i'm a What the [ __ ] does Hawk girl do years
17:41
for But today I can finally say that you have lost Superman curse your monologuing Lex to think that a green
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rock could Why does he not lose power when it's not the It's the [ __ ] sun the non red sun that gives him power why
17:54
is he not powerless like a [ __ ] vampire isn't it obvious money fame women you already have all those things
18:00
oh yeah feels like Batman doesn't make domination superman doesn't make before you kill me lex there's something I need to know what's your net worth
18:06
approximately 75 billion is that all you're standing impressive right but my kryptonite maybe if I thrust it
18:13
aggressively in your face wording lex did it run out of juice it's not working because I am not Superman how could I
18:19
conveniently forget about the shape-shifting member of the Justice League maybe you couldn't afford a better writer surprise [ __ ] my
18:26
crypto yoink let me file this one under contingency plan you set me up this was all an elaborate scheme to discover your
18:32
net worth they couldn't convince you shapeshift into Superman so I can trick Lex Luthther i'll let you drive the
18:38
Batmobile okay i want to drive too with your net worth you probably couldn't even afford a futuristic attack
18:43
helicopter with lasers explain he can make things he thinks about is that actually Is that actually the Green
18:49
Lantern power what do you think this is oh he can make shields apparently justice League made us reference an awful game i'm evil it's what I do do
18:56
you really think a missile is going to hurt me my perfectly combed hair get wrecked Superman now to invest in Batcoin to triple my network oh my
19:03
radiation poisoning for unexplained reasons I am in pain go home Lex you're drunk
19:11
maybe he'll explode into the ground wait a minute explosions kill people hello sir do you know what speed you were
19:18
going license and registration please you good i'm dying you fool oh no Lex
19:25
Luthor is dying is what I would say if you weren't a massive piece of [ __ ] please let's all help Lex since he said
19:32
please is what I would say if you weren't a massive piece of [ __ ] kryptonian lives matter let's get you to a hospital where am I you have cancer
19:38
what did you have to be so blunt it's been 2 minutes and 2 seconds and we still haven't gotten to this video's
19:44
punch line punch line i meant climax nice anyway your body is dying you have kryptonite induced radiation poisoning
19:50
but kryptonite only affects him it's a radioactive green rock which makes a sound effect when it's on screen it lit
19:57
up the whole floor of your building like a disco ball it's not really something you should be around i wasn't around it
20:03
that much we missed the part that I did keep it in my bedroom and I occasionally showered with it and there
20:10
was that one time I used it as a spoon for my breakfast cereal you should have gotten cancer years ago why must bad
20:16
things happen to good people good what about that time you blew up a boat i'm going to explode on your face wording
20:21
Lex psych i'm too short to die we need to save them but he's getting away but we need
20:27
to save them but he's getting away but we need to save was that the day all those people drowned and Lex got away
20:32
yes this is your fault ow is this a bad time to mention there's no cure i
20:38
already have a plan for that people of the Earth I have cancer i love this show
20:43
my only means of survival is to buy cancer and subjugate it to my will logic checks out but I need your money please
20:50
visit my GoFundMe for details why would I real be starting another They made a
20:55
GoFundMe to make somebody the first like woman billionaire or something it's like some kill the rest justice League stands
21:01
no chance against us what could Lex Luthther want with Batman he's probably inviting him over for his
21:07
friendly conversation shut up Flash why were you losing to a zombie i was
21:13
holding back my true strength since I beat him does that make me stronger than you shut up since I beat the bird does
21:19
that make me stronger than Superman shut up don't know that one i beat the stick guy so does that make me stronger than Shut up shut up indeed can't afford
21:26
something better than a gun i actually can't spend all your money on hair transplant cancer treatment who's the
21:31
bad guy now batman you're the one pointing the gun so you're probably feeling pretty silly i hated you before
21:36
the whole cancer thing so I'm good join me and together we can cure cancer and then sell the cure to the highest bidder
21:42
of course can you skip the bad standup routine and get to the part where you shoot me what do you think this is
21:47
suicide Squad killed the Justice League i knew you were still evil curse you for making me reference that trash apologies
21:53
for interrupting but the Justice League are about to kill us faster than your cancer just get us out of here you fools
22:00
did you forget the evil plan capture Batman and develop a cure for cancer me beat Superman me do good how were you
22:07
able to do that season one Superman week they say he hold back but Grundy know the truth do I still have cancer me
22:13
assume so then you didn't do good what solomon Grundy's thing he's just a big guy and he's dumb which other bald head
22:21
will I suggestively correct kill him Grundy so now that we've established
22:26
that I'm stronger than Superman how about we team up let's do it Lex let's cure cancer i never knew you were so
22:33
evil Joker but we can't do anything about a good one to me i know how the
22:38
bat thinks even his tracking chips are batshaped yeah the guy's clearly neurode divergent my bat senses are tingling i'm
22:44
pretty sure there's a bat-shaped object down there it like this again the idea is that if show off their legs then
22:52
it'll distract Batman that is sexist we're an evil organization what do you
22:58
expect cheetahs are like the bats of the jungle it's a good thing this three of hearts
23:03
is Was that the Roblox also I'm drifting into unconsciousness i have thrown billions of dollars going to get content
23:10
claimed for the Roblox you're talking futuristic attack helicopters with lasers but what ends up defeating him is a bag full of rocks the bag didn't come
23:17
cheap you know shut up i don't want to go to school school sorry Batman but
23:22
your parents are dead that was below the belt then perhaps I should aim for one of the two faces the animators included
23:28
in this picture see it there hiding behind his abnormally large chin we're here to cure cancer cancer why should I
23:34
give a damn about people with cancer so how did you do it Lex how did you get the better of the Batman some fancy new
23:40
Lex Corp gadget well that's very confidential so I couldn't possibly a ray that knocks people to sleep sound
23:45
waves that cause a concussion hypnotism actually it was a bag of rocks shut up a bag of rocks it is rather advanced so
23:52
allow me to explain it joker filled a bag with rocks and then he hit you over the head with it i don't know who should
23:58
feel worse about this definitely you if I don't get to kill you then I at least get to torture you daytime television
24:05
this is insane joking even I wouldn't stoop that low i have something much
24:10
better it involves you Harley Quinn and a park bench dear God have fun watching cutscenes from your favorite 2020
24:18
video game which was previously referenced the cure to cancer must surely be in Batman's belt batshaped
24:24
boomerangs i always wanted one of these preferably not thrown into the smoke bombs are not bad break soon trust me
24:30
everyone hated that video game and if they didn't then they're crazier than me batman has escaped how i never knew you
24:38
were a furry bats also have fur keep talking fur to me fur is a thick growth
24:43
of hair that covers the skin of almost all mammals the fur of mammals has many uses protection have no idea the monkey
24:50
is then time for plan B lie perfectly still Lex this green radioactive sunbed
24:55
will definitely cure your cancer a few more beckerels ought to do
25:01
it why he inflating why is he some bad news
25:07
the bad news is that your more buff than before humanite i'm going to block you from my only fans the good news is that
25:13
your cancer's cancer has superpowers you've just been upgraded to the bald eagle tier you like old men i like
25:19
protecting the earth and the old man here has a magical artifact yeah I bet he does let's get in there and seduce
25:24
him now you're speaking my language coming through losers you jumped the queue they let us pass we didn't if you
25:30
keep talking back to me I'll rip your heart out what i said I like soda i wish to see Hugh Hefner and I wish my hands
25:36
were smaller the Justice League sure you are bub and so are they
25:41
batman is that you shut up Flash i love it when he says that i don't want to hurt you have you seen my hands the only
25:47
thing that can hurt me is overpriced lotion i've changed my mind did I mention I have big hands wonder Woman is
25:53
dead what should we do Batman have you tried not being poor you will pay for your blood think we can take him Flash
25:58
it might be tough if one more shows up it might be tough if conventionally attractive females show up
26:05
damn my sexism did someone say sexism the early 2000s babe because you
26:11
Wait is Hugh Hefer actually in this episode what the [ __ ] my mother is Hippolita why does he look like he came from the critic dude let my normally
26:18
sized hand take yours when is Hugh Hefner a [ __ ] super villain your magic artifact what the
26:25
[ __ ] is this behave movie quotes am I right there's only one thing that can stop the Batman and that's groovy tunes
26:31
is this actually the Batman's episode what the [ __ ] is that you mean mansion i know what I said starring J sherman this
26:37
is my beautiful I love the critic watch the critic please it's only three seasons long it's super good for saying that is that a promise flash though it
26:44
does require like a moderate amount of like movie knowledge from like stuff in the night my speed force senses tingling
26:50
i'm playfully kicking water keep doing that and I'll drown you you can drown me all night long what was that have to go
26:55
and chase some tail i never knew Flash was a hunter it's in our blood baby and you're looking at the alpha male okay do
27:02
my animated facial expressions not at all in fact I was wondering where you get your energy from medication
27:08
dangerous amounts of medication oh and also a magical stone which in the wrong hands could destroy is this really you
27:14
have to love nest it is unusually dark stop smiling like it understandable
27:20
anyway here's the magical stone there is a lot of references but plenty of stuff is still funny like you don't have to be
27:26
a '90s kid what is there baby you are an animal like this it is very much of its time but like is this kind of like the
27:32
Simpsons i would sooner mate with Hades than you is he hot kind of you're sending me mixed signals where is the
27:39
stone wait your turn babe it's here and you'll never touch it then I shall turn your suspiciously older boyfriend into a
27:46
sexually suggestive worm oh my sweet irony batman yeah I'm close
27:52
personal friends with him wait does Flash actually do this in the episode sounds like Wonder Woman got the Is this
27:58
real like you girls like soda i thought they just made that up for Flash stealing and property damage another
28:05
productive night my body is in pain another productive night yo Hugh how about you turn into a giant murderous
28:11
worm earlier in the day people are trying to sleep around here my spine is in pain i'mma break your spine if you
28:16
don't shut your ass up dumbass demon worshiping giant worm ass [ __ ] we have beaten the Justice League this
28:22
Flash is a failed womanizer what the red my one weakness that's what I love about cartoons we don't talk about that flash
28:28
is under high gravity flash like a Jewish guy we just sort of theory i
28:33
could escape whenever I want why don't you we made the Martian tea post i am asserting my dominance wonder Woman's
28:40
tied up who's in charge now [ __ ] i'm sending you to hell and the lantern is nothing without his toy it ain't a toy
28:46
Bird Brain john that's kind of racist don't you tell me what's racist this isn't a toy either how about you pop a
28:52
cap in his ass weird kink shoot him i prefer to bludgeon people with my mace i should have known a crazy [ __ ] like you
28:57
would betray us yeah hindsight's 2020 anyway have fun rotting in yourselves your Uber Eatats has arrived aren't you
29:04
a little short for a hawk guard a Star Wars reference nice now eat your squid eyeballs it's actually a calorie dense
29:11
meal full of protein i'm a vegetarian that's kind of hot it means I don't eat right so were you dropped on your head
29:17
or something you're an insensitive pig i have no idea what that is anyway enjoy your grl i'm tied up i kind of noticed
29:23
so you'll have to feed me what's the matter afraid I might bite you need to bite to eat your food i mean why you
29:28
well I'm made of chicken so I don't think you'd want to give me your meat all right [ __ ] let me just slowly lower my hand in this Saturday morning cartoon
29:35
for children and pick up this tasty tentacle now eat my pleasure why are you looking at me like that like you want to
29:42
do horrible like Emainty look at that how is this not censored because teeth my piano hands you probably weren't very
29:48
good anyway don't crush my musical dream fine then I'll just crush your pelvis oh my sweet snoo this pain is exquisite
29:55
don't tell my wife this thumbnail is over i must save my useless friends diana pick me i was kind of thinking
30:00
Superman or Flash would be I'm dressed like a bat that is true [ __ ] love bats okay so that was like a guy dressed
30:06
did you help a guy out i don't see any guys about here i'm dying batman you know who else died my
30:11
parents in front of me can you tell me this story later it's not a story flash Hey buddy stealing is wrong frisbee
30:18
Superman you good is that a bat-shaped man you must be delirious i'm a man-shaped bat you ain't going nowhere
30:23
that means I'm going somewhere if you want like an edgy superhero but bad
30:28
comically the Flash but his like reaction time is normal human they can go really fast but it doesn't work well
30:35
an entry on the DC wiki i hope no one is seeing this hey Superman i'm sorry it's probably already a Watchman character like that was hilarious also here's an
30:42
electrical hammer just call me Thor do you want us to get sued you're free i'm a beat a man to death she was created by
30:48
a WWE when could you do that yeah that her powers are very suspicious and I I
30:54
completely believe that shifting is neat i have you now wonder Woman used rat can I be in the thumbnail you cannot it's
31:00
gimly time [ __ ] oh my sweet copyright strike i don't want to be Thor anymore who throws a hammer this episode is
31:06
stupid let's get out of here take my hand Flash i don't want to share my seat with Flash fine I'll just grab him by
31:11
the I'm sure it's been asked a thousand times but like could Superman pick up Thor's hammer cuz like the implication
31:16
is it's not there's not like a set amount of weight you just can't pick it up right
31:23
sir there's been an issue did we run out of squid eye unless he is the Thor because that happens sometimes and they
31:29
killed all our It would anyway if they were like in the right universe destroyed our space they look like [ __ ] Harvey Birdman extras i can't
31:36
deal with these hawk people get the [ __ ] off screen is this true and she's going to betray us in the next episode you
31:42
know too much oh my god Doc we should watch Birdman
31:47
for the um secret watch party that's where you belong shut up Batman i can't hear you over the sound of me running i
31:53
found the This is not the emotion that's not the emoji I meant to send probably so you can't use your ring bit of a
31:59
coincidence that the black man gets the handcuffs i don't really think that's got anything to do with Seems a bit
32:04
racially where are we is that not dangerous to use the [ __ ] stores are for poor people we can't all afford to
32:10
have our clothes custom made clearly you're missing half of your costume nice one Batman poor people suck batman was
32:16
not so nice what do your eyes see Superman a ceiling i meant your X-ray eyes all right well the skies are full
32:21
with Hawkmen i don't think you should do that Batman or whichever man you are justice League plot twist lex Luthther
32:30
only has cancer because [ __ ] X-ray eyes still stand in with the crowd what
32:35
about my secret identity i hate the ending of Birdman by the way what the [ __ ] well I think my identity is a
32:41
secret how many people [ __ ] i'm way bigger than the Hulk there's no way I'm telling you who I am i don't need any
32:47
more creeps finding me on social media you also have stalkers my mom comments on all of my Instagram posts having a
32:53
loving mother must be so difficult i don't want you stalking me either i already know she looks so nervous i know
32:59
all of your damn identities how because I'm the [ __ ] Batman wally West the fastest Twinkie eater alive i need a lot
33:05
of calories and a closet ginger your hair is on fire i'm a strawberry blonde clark Kent my worst employee actually I
33:12
work for the Daily Planet it's a subsidiary of Wayne Entertainment well [ __ ] you're the billionaire Bruce Wayne
33:17
damn right and you spend all your free time running how has he not been fired by the way he's He's got to be doing Superman things on the regular we are
33:24
not the best people to be defending Earth well half of us are aliens i'm a human you dumbass racist [ __ ] i was
33:29
referring to myself Wonder Woman and Martian Manhunter i apologize wonder Woman's alien believe I found a suit
33:34
that I guess proportion my beanie keeps my head warm green and red look awful
33:39
you must hate Christmas are my good looks distracting you diana's waist is breaking the laws of
33:45
physics i always look like this you look like you swallowed a yo-yo sideways shut up Batman batman get them well [ __ ]
33:52
maybe you could throw your kidneys at them i assume you carry them in a bag shut up Batman where is Batman kiss me
33:58
Batman that's hot sorry for kissing you it was the only way he wouldn't notice us i sure hope I don't die later i said
34:04
let's go to the bat in some runs luckily got about the hawks that have been
34:10
bald/cancer/smartness okay from radiation with baby soups landed on Earth you extinct how'd you get into my
34:15
cave a better question is how did Superman not notice me i don't see so good with my glasses on i have something
34:21
for you what's this supposed to be it's a VHS speak English a videoape it contains our secret evil plans to
34:27
destroy Earth your species has mastered imagine you work at a [ __ ] newspaper and like on tapes yes the guy in the
34:33
[ __ ] cube over is like 250 lbs of raw muscle like 7 feet tall and like is
34:40
missing half of the time talking to the Justice League why is the quality it looks suspiciously like the world's most
34:46
famous superhero but only when his glasses aren't on those words up take her away to save the world we need to split into two teams team Batman is
34:53
totally not going to die and team B the first will stop the Earth destroying weapon the second will murder Hawkmen i
34:59
picked the second one wait Hawkman are back what the [ __ ] i didn't realize hawk people were such such a big thing in DC
35:06
sweet ride Batman want to get inside batman what the [ __ ] i think I can fly this is that another one of your Martian
35:12
superpowers what does this button do you little [ __ ] am I going to prison i'm going to
35:18
hell is neat greetings Haw alfred is so [ __ ] badass by the way mind if I turn
35:25
into a giant monster batman used this Alfred I guess Alfred counts as my second DC character like members of the
35:32
stuff I like green lantern are attacking you Superman i sense a Shakespearean reference i sense a fleet of Hawk
35:38
spaceships you know usually we stand no chance what do you mean have you guys noticed when all seven of us are
35:43
together we're weak as hell but when our numbers are reduced we're stronger you get knocked out by electricity a lot
35:49
it's almost as if our strength varies to maintain dramatic tension john that's just stupid the reason why we're
35:54
stronger is because this is the season finale oh right i love murdering Hawkman flash you didn't even do anything did
36:00
they drop any loot this isn't Diablo if you put them all in an escape pod I hear an optional boss shows up daddy he needs
36:05
a new can of soda batman what are you doing only one of us gets to kamicazi into the earth destroying weapon is this
36:12
escape pod headed for Earth not my problem do something hunter i wish I could help you Flash can't you phase
36:17
through the door then use your flight and strength to navigate i know it's the a bridged one but has Flash done literally anything so far he's like 30
36:24
minutes in better put my seat belt on you want to press this button don't you i do well you cannot i don't think you
36:29
understand how this works since I'm on my own I have a massive strength increase my plot armor even though the Justice League have been Couldn't he
36:36
just like make a thing that is like really pointy and hits the button i am significant is that his superpower you
36:42
villain yeah that's probably why anyway time for me to dramatically prep they insist upon
36:48
themselves you dare hit a girl well she's not really a girl like yeah she's called
36:53
Hawk Girl but she's clearly a woman so it's not that bad wait why do I care i'm evil clumsily attack the one thing that
37:00
could defeat me how terribly convenient it's kind of hot in here also I think I'm dying i'll save you Batman and I'm
37:05
taking your comfy chair is this hell can Superman fly in space how does that work
37:11
i saved your chair [ __ ] do you want some tea how the [ __ ] does You're not supposed to ask this kind of [ __ ] but
37:17
like what is propelling him like he just I'm glad we could clear john I'm leaving the Justice League don't you want to
37:23
know how we voted i don't belong here John i belong with the man I love with Alfred goodbye forever my eyes are wet
37:29
he's actually at a disadvantage in the Hawk fight room cuz the room is yellow seriously someone needs to keep you all
37:35
because of red shift or something i'm not I'm not aware of yellow shift every other Tuesday actually it's every other
37:40
Wednesday hump days am I right shut up Flash what the hell have I joined the world's greatest superheroes and Batman
37:46
i forget which one's faster and which one's blue but red shift and blue shift areues i watched my parents get murdered
37:51
when I was a child i spend most of my time in a cave with a man twice my age i dress up as a bat what do you think no
37:57
need to be a wise guy i mean he doesn't spend all the time shut up Flash what the [ __ ] is this welcome cyborg thinks
38:04
you guys have snacks this is all just a massive misunderstanding right Batman if by massive Green Lantern's weakness is
38:10
the color yellow oh you I thought you meant like the bird person realize how dangerous you all are then I don't
38:16
belong here not just yellow lantern so of course there's yellow lanterns flash why yellow say that a lot perhaps he has
38:22
dementia dementia these nuts cuz dementia sounds kind of like did you
38:28
mention so it's a bit of Shut up Flash you really oh my god he's like higher
38:33
budget this must be a different show are you so arrogant to not have a I just now noticed that yourself i'm just an
38:39
introvert millionaire playboy in a bat costume yellow represents fear in the emotional spectrum thing so green is
38:45
like happiness and money so I want you to have this kryptonite my one weakness what about red suns apart from that and
38:51
magic just take the dam i was just mentioning that magic this is useless what do you mean i have a ton of this
38:57
stuff back in the batcave what a literal metric ton alfred snapped his spine carrying it across my mansion bruce this
39:03
is ridiculous bane snapping it back into place this is a gesture of support and trust i could kill this one's long i'm
39:09
going to have to do a real quick BRB i'm sorry [Music]
39:15
how bad is the the Kill the Justice League game i'm like I'm intrigued
39:20
thanks to this this video is having the opposite effect toilet am I a joke to you yes off Batman who do you think pays
39:27
the bills Mr journalist excuse me in case you didn't notice this is Space Station because I'm rich and you're not
39:34
i'm going to go sleep on my We got
39:39
L oh excuse me um red is anger orange is greed okay
39:47
that's new to me yellow is fear i can kind of see that green is
39:53
willpower blue hope indigo compassion violet love white life black death
39:58
ultraviolet hidden emotions gray is sorrow okay what what's that bright ball
40:04
of energy above my shoulders if you see the community post the Arkham games like dunked on it
40:10
no idea what I'm reading we're too stupid to be in space does he need like a suit
40:17
can you just suffocate Batman i'm so sorry this like the fourth time I felt hunter
40:25
wait does does Martian Wait does he breathe oxygen what the hell disappeared
40:31
electricity by one weakness oh it's no longer a live service game really i thought they were meant to be strong
40:38
they are sir they just have a few weaknesses such as electricity and red
40:43
suns and rocks and magic i'd like to clarify that it's a very specific type
40:48
of the pink one's correct shut up send him to war world you're to be my opponent thanos is that you shut up or
40:56
we'll get sued we will fight later for the amusement of a crowd of generic aliens and I will win well I don't mean
41:04
to brag but I'm the man of steel i'm kind of indestructible steel is weak i
41:10
need to rescue my bluish green friend there's a lot of bluish green freaks down here he never uses his superpowers
41:17
oh that guy he's about to be eaten by a space alligator cranky I must save my useless friend for a sewer monster your
41:23
teeth are in surprisingly good condition they're very human so I don't like Are you okay i can't use my powers Superman
41:30
i'm aware it's a recurring joke at this point i actually can't this time this planet's atmosphere is interfering with
41:36
them listen John I'd love to believe you but you're kind of like the boy who cried space alligator pardon martian
41:43
manhunter doesn't need to breathe at all i mean that makes sense i mean there's not much to breathe on Mars you might be
41:49
the bad i'm sure there's some kind of gas escape prison
41:54
superman did that fall defeat you of course not it'll take a lot more than gravity to get the better of me
42:01
i suppose we'll need to add robots to his list of weaknesses are you ready for a fight on my right gauntlets is the
42:09
purple skin t looks like the [ __ ] Oh god what's his name the the final boss of the first uh name for legal reasons
42:15
on my left p so that's what the earth stands for who has virtually no
42:22
weaknesses unless you're watching Justice League also like the queen or the monarch from um Venture which I
42:28
still need to see give him his axe i don't know what to do with this final Fantasy 14's moon is a 100% breathable
42:34
atmosphere huh like my knee i love when you go to the [ __ ] moon in video games final Fantasy 8 i sure hope we can
42:40
win this fight despite my knee being in excruciating pain so that's how you use
42:46
an axe good to know you can't win Thanos i don't even know who you are i'm
42:52
Superman though i'm not actually a man i'm a Kryptonian it's a funny story
42:57
really well apart from the part where my planet was destroyed killing all my friends and family you talk too much so
43:05
I remember it was like a super big deal i hate when they killed Superman for realies in the comics yet rocket attack
43:12
you're not going to believe I got drugged to the comic book store every I couldn't like buy anything maybe it's
43:18
because I only have pupils or something then I'll just punch you that's oddly consistent between the two stunning
43:25
plan great Scott jolly good show i shouldn't have bet my net worth on
43:31
Superman winning i'm ready to use 2% of my power now your jokes are as
43:37
ridiculous as your s well this is an upsetting turn of events but the
43:43
audience loves him i'm richer than Batman okay Superman you can kill Thanos
43:48
now no if you don't then these robots will zap you around like a pingpong ball
43:53
i'd like to see them try i should bet on the robot electricity
43:59
why am I being electrocuted because I Is he actually weak to electricity loves it
44:04
too scared to fight me yourself you dare challenge me he is afraid i'll electrocute the whole lot of you sir
44:12
this is merely season 1 superman he's renowned for losing i think you have a good chance very well i accept your
44:19
challenge Superman cool just promise not to bring kryptonite red suns magic books
44:25
or poorly drawn robots with electricity computing emotional damage how could I possibly bring a red sun just promise i
44:33
agree to your ridiculous terms what do you know about this Superman in a red
44:39
confusion reaction hurt eyebeams a chin that just won't quit calm down buddy but
44:45
in practice he kind of loses all the time what of his plotter it appears to
44:50
be completely missing missing surely that's a mistake it seems to have been intentionally left out to balance the
44:58
power of the Justice League but in doing so it's made him dreadfully weak almost
45:03
as weak as Batman in fact that's furry indeed i can't lose to someone who's friends with a furry i need insurance
45:10
damn it bring it to it do you mind fixing my suit the big S is kind of my
45:15
trademark and this rip might impact merch we're not here to discuss merch i
45:20
have 10 shouldn't his suit get like [ __ ] ground into dust by attacks by the way like his suit is apparently
45:26
exactly as strong as he is listen buddy i'm kind of a big deal i can't have him
45:32
boss out i have a reputation every episode what about that time you lost to Wonder it was more like a draw or when
45:37
Grundy made you his punching bag i skipped breakfast that time and then Hawk Girl effortlessly defeated him shut
45:43
up Hawk Girl does she like have wings well yeah she's a girl who's a heart how
45:50
many of your friends are If his suit is as strong as he is does kryptonite make his suit weaker because if it doesn't
45:56
shouldn't his suit like destroy him lasers make planets when he's like kryptonited which happens like every 10
46:01
minutes then your planet go jokes's on you my planet already went boo baby
46:06
rocket was loaded with super i'll just destroy another planet your own planet no i agree to your ridiculous term good
46:13
boy just be sure to make it look convincing like how you lost my robots there were three of them one b one me
46:20
scrub a planet destroying weapon i suppose I should do something about that
46:26
calling the rest of the Justice League and getting them to stop it counts as something right losing a fight i'm not
46:32
sure I can do that then allow me to help so should I like let you hit me a few
46:38
times or Why did you grab my electrical axe well I am sort of terrified of
46:43
electricity at this point so I I got really good RNG for this fight so I'd
46:48
rather not res planet fine then I guess I'll just punch it
46:56
why do you persist it's kind of funny really when I'm trying to win I lose and
47:02
when I'm trying to lose I win i guess it's the season 1 curse are you telling me the plot is protecting you like a
47:09
shield or perhaps like armor why don't you tell me come at me bro time for me to do
47:17
something useful good evening i would like you to destroy the planet destroying weapon destroy it we've spent
47:24
decades constructing it we starved half our population my grandmother died yeah
47:30
that's cool and all but you should really just destroy it if I destroy the planet destroy so while I am bitching
47:36
about like things being stupid I will say the outsiders or whatever the [ __ ] they're called in Marvel like that's
47:42
that that's too much like I hate the whole thing where like you know what i have done a lot guess I'll pause while
47:48
I'm talking about Oh I'm That's just my luck it's almost over but like I don't like any character like kind of the
47:54
flood in Halo 3 just like anything that makes the entire rest of the universe or
48:00
plot seem pointless and like every outsider is like that
48:05
like sometimes they beat up um Galactis and stuff but like what the hell i can
48:12
Why do I have a feeling that Martian Manhunter has done absolutely nothing useful this episode not unlike yourself
48:19
though i guess being my personal punching bag has its uses well I'll save you Superman who are you again it's me
48:26
your biggest fan do you have the slightest idea how
48:32
little that narrows this video tommy teller who killed these 75,000 yesterday i appeared in a whole episode that's
48:37
cool and all but I have a fight to lose well fought Superman how long do I have
48:43
to lie if Superman punches himself would it hurt are you going to draw me like one of your French girls have a weird
48:49
reference but okay superman you no longer have to lose i disabled the
48:54
planet destroying weapon also on a completely unrelated note Green Lantern
48:59
and Hawk Girl are here they I was wondering where they were john did you even do anything i punched a man who
49:05
mentioned Goku good job buddy this isn't over shut up oh right in the glock and spiel sir
49:13
protect your glock and spiel
49:18
i like soda you're going to get diabetes want to see me he's doing this so anyway are either of
49:25
you single that's a Batman question there he goes pretending to know Batman again i do know Batman he tells me to
49:32
shut up all the time just ask my therapist i bet he isn't even a superhero do you think I wear this
49:38
skintight red suit for the fun of it insanely uncomfortable maybe you should lose some weight food makes me happy
49:44
does he have some kind of like suit thing to keep his balls from moving too much when he runs windows kill us all
49:52
you saved us i was just trying to save your food thank you so how long can I carry you both before it becomes awkward
49:59
you just made it awkward well all right then sir are you okay is he even like
50:04
super strong call me money is that the bat signal in the sky it's daytime and you're not Batman i have to go and save
50:11
Gotham from a dragon a dragon dragon d's nuts i hope the dragon eats him i may as well
50:19
stop this criminal while running away from my problems we're being followed by who what the Justice League nice do they
50:26
I guess he would have to have super strength his suit is anti- friction inside and out i assume the beans in I
50:32
was just about to say like if he touches anything at top speed he should like explode i might get arrested for
50:38
illegally drinking soda do I look like I have money you look like a criminal not a cool criminal so the characters really
50:44
do look like they came from criminals that at the start of a Would a forgettable criminal who loses do this
50:51
[Music] flash you destroyed half the city what do you mean look
50:57
I failed to see how this is so is his eyes always green or if the ring is taken from him does he like many burgers
51:03
as I did you wouldn't be able to walk let's just see what they were stealing what's the deal with the ring anyway like it can be removed but if you wear
51:10
the ring you don't become the lantern right are you thinking what I'm thinking we're not selling them i'm dangerously poor explain what these drugs do again
51:17
they're hallucinating star Labs made the flashes you're obese then your head explodes from the future of course it is
51:22
pinocchio then a gorilla kids these days why do you have so many monkeys i like monkeys hey big guy you want one are you
51:29
unable to read question why do you have that sign it's not like your lab is open
51:34
to the general public how dare you question me do you keep forgetting i am a scientist you still haven't answered
51:40
my question scientists don't answer questions if I wasn't meant to feed the animals then the ring is the equivalent
51:47
of a magic wand get out what the hell's wrong with you what do you mean isn't this a normal amount of food kids got
51:52
worms hold my burger shaped hot dogs i have another car to chase i ain't eating this
52:00
Jones i just It's just how mama used to make i apologize you see the mustard and ketchup in the back this is real
52:07
business hey mom mom can I have some pocket money
52:14
just a hideous gorilla you're in danger you sound like my doctor i'm the only doctor around here with a PhD in rooftop
52:21
bazooka invisibility electricity superman's one weakness
52:27
i had a horrible dream that I was being played by Ezra Miller legal issues can't keep up with me for unexplained reasons
52:34
my chest is in pain oh wait because I'm obese see I actually get fat in this
52:40
episode cuz he ate all the [ __ ] i could play Juggernaut such big brain thinking flash maybe a bit too bigrained i look
52:47
like the love child between Jimmy Neutron and Mega Bind
52:53
this is the face I make when I look at my bank back to normal apart from my hands exploding okay he's being mind
52:59
controlled i gather that the writers he's a monkey for this episode flash is in danger is the monkey mind controlling
53:05
him is the Green Lantern i so much care them agreed you and Hawk Girl should go
53:11
hawk Girl has not done anything someone must stay guard don't worry John i'm here to protect the watchtowwer from
53:17
Is that electricity robots with electricity green rocks i really think I
53:23
should stay you just don't want to do anything i am a valued member of this team let's just go
53:31
it's so funny to see like characters that are like a big deal in like past stuff but they're like you never see them again well of course I can then why
53:39
aren't you doing anything oh like right now like Robin popping in and out of Batman stuff a lot of pressure do
53:45
something can I go home now you're useless
53:53
lot of electricity in the show maybe we should call Batman flash is in danger don't care so is Green Lantern what's
53:58
the issue electric force field according to chat GPT the solution lies in West Africa where's that you don't know where
54:06
Africa is i spent thousands of years on a remote island let me talk to someone else i also don't know are you all
54:12
stupid i'm not even from this planet how about I quiz you she's not from the planet they have hawks in where wherever
54:18
she's from flash what happened you fell into a druginduced coma also you
54:24
urinated yourself could this day get any worse an evil gorilla has taken over the city that's kind of funny and he's
54:30
imposing a ban on Bast Fu i'm going to rip his heart out foolish humans he's
54:37
got your new leader you may be questioning my suitability
54:43
for the role that's if I didn't i love shots of of evil people and then there's
54:48
a screen behind them with them i love that [ __ ] it's like that Spider-Man
54:53
where he's got a p he's sitting in an office and there's a picture of himself sitting at his desk i love that sludge
54:59
is this your Don't remind me fan art of myself doing but fear not i will reshape
55:05
your bodies into temples of strength and then I'll launch a nuclear
55:11
missile strike on Guerilla City because those guys suck
55:18
we need to stop him he's already gone plot convenience plot the missiles have
55:23
been launched excellent central Africa will soon be without its gorilla city great wait Central Africa guerilla City
55:31
is in West Africa are you sure is the giant talking gorilla sure just look at this map from earlier in the episode
55:38
this inconsistency is troubling your lack of soda is troubling solivar who
55:43
that's my name i thought your name was Gorilla Mon shut up Flash the Green Lantern is disabling your missiles as we
55:49
speak in this picture it's nighttime and in this picture it's
55:54
daytime why did he need to do that couldn't he just like instantiate the thing in front of it so it explodes that
56:01
travels through space firing lasers only managed one missile indeed excellent did
56:06
everyone forget that I'm pointing a gun what kind of gun is that monkey fight
56:12
can I exchange your helmet for food i was kind of hoping to fight something more impressive than a gorilla i'm not
56:17
just any gorilla i am the mighty Gro you're naked
56:23
[Music] how about I make this easy for you i won't even wear my pretty tiara that's
56:29
the only thing protecting us from his mind control personally I think the whole mind control thing is a conspiracy
56:35
theory along with gravity and the moon landing your friends with a Martian i failed to see how that's relevant i'm a
56:42
nuclear brain they found a different paint sound effect oh he's dead what happened i
56:48
rewired this helmet when he was effortlessly defeating you how were you able to rewire technology you've never
56:54
even seen before because plot there's zero wires his brain will wear off eventually he never used that on me i
57:01
loved him what a tragic plot twist online dating am I right ruined by Flash's quips i sure hope the rest of
57:08
the Justice League can stop those missiles so you're telling me that South Africa is a country yes but South
57:14
America is a continent this is confusing i miss Mars earth is under attack maybe
57:20
you should use your superpowers for once i love the Australian states by the way it's like they gave up halfway through
57:26
and there's like you're too lazy to do your own fighting shut up Hog Girl you can't talk to her like that shut up
57:32
Flash let's just go wow this place sucks maybe we What the [ __ ] are these guys
57:38
destroy it human psychic they like discount um sentinels do they
57:45
do sentinels anymore sentinels were so cool and then they like made them super lame no I mean I literally don't want to
57:51
fight you can't just kill a billion of them in one hit like that uh no hook girl aren't those like a thing i'm not a
57:58
Pokémon also I resent you choosing Flash i remember like the '90s comics they're like really big around then maybe that's
58:04
why you can't get a girlfriend this Pidgey is what did you call me
58:09
i'll save you hot girl pretty good catch right and I didn't even need a Pokeball shut up Flash superhero leap attack
58:20
why did jumping right into his weapons not work use your powers John my powers
58:25
you know those things you never use that are like really good that should make you like I don't know stronger than
58:31
Superman his assault is unyielding i don't have time i'm totally cool with you charging up or whatever just let me
58:38
know when you're ready don't pressure me
58:43
flash Hog Girl i have done all I can the rest is up to you want to want to play
58:51
Fortnite yes you won't get me that easily
58:58
i wonder if that restaurant has any soda soda offers low nutritional value that's true i'm going to turn your mom into a
59:04
toaster why are Earths are backing into our attacks the plot is establishing us as a
59:11
credible threat how will the humans ever respect them again
59:18
they won't unless the plot forsakes us later and they start one-shotting us but
59:24
that will never happen did someone say one shot you're not dealing with the average hero anymore you're dealing with
59:31
a superhero wow I'm not getting knocked out by electricity beating this nameless
59:36
mass-produced robot may be my greatest feat yet my father gave me that staff
59:42
under you're a monster actually I'm an alien wow Superman you actually didn't
59:49
suck i'm Earth's greatest hero Flash today I vow to be the champion it needs
59:55
to never again be struck down by electricity
1:00:00
get wrecked Superman no you my back hurts from carrying speed john
1:00:07
were there people in that car what car the car you just landed on and exploded
1:00:12
probably not i wish I didn't have X-ray vision for me right affirmative let's
1:00:18
just get the hell out of here before these idiots destroy the city john you have robot friends they ain't my friends
1:00:24
am I your friend shut up Flash yeah we're best buds
1:00:32
oh my god aren't there like different planet green lanterns or something thanks there he is oh my god
1:00:39
bad how are people meant to take us seriously now problem for you i'm a serious character
1:00:45
sure I may look like a floating male reproductive organ but I I hate what they did to Modok in that movie by the
1:00:51
way modok is so fun he's He's stupid yes but like it's a perfectly comic book kind of in fear they're probably falling
1:00:58
to the ground laughing i'm the most eligible bachelor in sector 1123 i'm on
1:01:04
the cover of magazines magazines let's just go john Stewart you stand trial for
1:01:10
the most heinous of offenses how do you plead guilty well that was easy i object
1:01:17
you shouldn't have come here giant spooky faces i command you to release my friend no love the trial episodes do you
1:01:25
even know why he's on trial did he save a woman from getting hit by a car and then carry her for an uncomfortable
1:01:31
amount of time until she phoned the cops you're not going on missions alone anymore i destroyed a planet oh got
1:01:38
attacked by some space pirates fired my laser and bounced off hit a volcano or something then it went boom kind of
1:01:44
unlucky execute him superman i mean me and John will go investigate the debris
1:01:50
flash you buy us some time you want the world's fastest man to slow things down we both know I'm faster than you that's
1:01:56
canonically inaccurate just pretend to be a lawyer or something john Stewart do
1:02:01
you wish to defend yourself i don't then choose your execution death by death
1:02:09
speaking of lawyers I much prefer um superheroes like an idiot flash what are
1:02:15
you doing blow this case wide like they have one or zero powers read it from chat GPT that's how I've been learning
1:02:22
law and a backtory and also troubling that isn't like they came from [ __ ] planet Supermantopia
1:02:30
loses this trial that you both be executed could you repeat that my like
1:02:35
come on half of these people came from [ __ ] outer space and Green Lantern's power kind of comes from space right
1:02:41
defend himself from space pirates what if they I forget how the [ __ ] the Flash is the Flash is just fasting works
1:02:47
besides it wasn't even a planet anyway it was more of a glorified asteroid it
1:02:53
was definitely a planet it was on the brink of a catastrophic ice age the climate was rather lovely actually most
1:02:59
planets aren't even populated 3 billion there were 3 billion of them all dead it
1:03:04
was just a prank bro please kill me the Green Lantern needs help we're all Green
1:03:10
Lantern the one that isn't a baked potato i have a name it's that Why did
1:03:15
they let this one talk i'm from I'm kind of a big deal you scare kids don't you
1:03:21
dare say that i'm trying to get more screen time in this damn show so you better show me some respect a scrambled
1:03:27
egg says what what something isn't right John is it the
1:03:33
fact that we have to wear space suits no this trip is sick what I mean is that this moon is still in orbit even though
1:03:39
its planet was destroyed uh yes of course you read my mind no you're the
1:03:45
one that can read minds it's one of the many superpowers you never used if the rubble stay in the same area still would
1:03:51
have the same i've been standing a lot today and my legs are tired let's just split up probably going the planet
1:03:58
wanted to be like fly away it's an act of mercy okay I've heard enough execute
1:04:03
them both this isn't how I pictured my Sunday going would you show some damn dignity for once digging De's nuts i
1:04:10
object must you keep breaking our glass i must because I have a very important
1:04:16
announcement to make i didn't suck this episode yeah remember when I beat those
1:04:22
robots at the start it was pretty cool right i even phoned my mom not my biological mom since she's dead or when
1:04:29
it blew up unlike the planet above you it still exists the debris was an
1:04:34
illusion i have three eyes in this picture but who would do such dear God John what did they do to you i guess the
1:04:41
animators got lazy or something it keeps Oh actually he has four heard that they
1:04:46
just face why the robots of course they're about to attack a planet of elderly gnome men things have attention
1:04:53
to go my X-Men i'll be suing you later brothers
1:05:02
green lanterns but then our former masters turned us into glorified bodyguards thank you for the exposition
1:05:10
it is required since this episode suddenly shifted gears i appreciate the robot punch now let us go and squish
1:05:17
them [Music]
1:05:22
but the green No no no see this is why I don't like DC every time I learn lore I hate it what the [ __ ] so we should be
1:05:32
Are those the people that like distribute the [ __ ] rings or something oh nice Star Wars turrets you
1:05:37
just destroyed six of them when we could barely manage three earlier makes perfect sense right i think the main one
1:05:43
is absorbing all of the gnome juice by the way dear God
1:05:50
juicing the universe or something i'mma eat you
1:05:56
what just happened i don't know but it's making me hungry thanks for saving us John we cool Zed you ugly as hell we
1:06:03
cool excellent work i couldn't have done it better myself that isn't saying much thanks for believing in me guys let's go
1:06:10
home first there's the small matter of my legal fees shut up Flash a giant
1:06:15
robot is attacking do something Batman shut up Flash you're all useless oh save you Hulk Girl throw your battering in it
1:06:22
don't you just use your laser vision i'm trying to include you thanks we defeated
1:06:27
the generic robot also it's about to fall on hot girl and the others is flash there let it fall i hate you guys they
1:06:34
seem to have disappeared does this mean Justice League's canceled where are we allow me to find out what's wrong with
1:06:40
him he's exhausted from using his powers i'm pretty sure nothing in that last place nothing is a lot for him i can
1:06:45
still hear you i'll just survey the area this place sucks stop criminals it is I
1:06:51
Tom Turbine who oh gee I don't know maybe a guy climbed up onto a rooftop just to announce himself i can barely
1:06:57
hear you then perhaps you should feel me please rephrase that why are you attacking us i don't know if you belong
1:07:03
in the skies or a kitchen not sexist and or racist welcome to the 1960s the 60s what do I kind of weird that's the first
1:07:11
thing you thought of dad I sure as hell hope not don't make me the Flash's dad was also the Flash oh no this is like
1:07:17
brain stuff he's mocking us can I go home now
1:07:23
gee mister thanks for saving is that even a mistake the man that cares about children can't possibly be evil make
1:07:29
yourselves at home sips on the chair i am the streak the leader of the guild because Super Speed is the cat what the
1:07:35
[ __ ] is this reach into the choir buddy i'm Catman my parents were murdered in front of me by a pack of cats
1:07:41
childhood trauma am I right black Siren i don't have superpowers or weapons but I can do a back flip you don't belong
1:07:47
here he's even more sexist than we are you fit right in siren how about you get us some cookies want to help i'm not
1:07:53
going to the kitchen's wonderful mr turbine why don't you have I because I smile a lot and also anime hey Cookie
1:08:01
flash if you ever call me that again you'll be the fastest man alive with a lip i was talking to the food and that's how Flash's super speed transported you
1:08:08
all to the past so it's his fault this is a witch hunt is there any way back of course allow me to dude how tall are you
1:08:15
excuse me sorry but you're noticeably shorter than everyone else it's kind of distracting you all can make your own
1:08:21
damn way back to the future this is awful my damn food bill dr blizzard is attacking the city sirens i'm leaving
1:08:27
before I accidentally kill someone ladies first at least I can't accidentally kill someone here isn't that right Green Guardsman tom Turbine
1:08:34
they're all dead but then who are those sexist and racist people we've been talking to this whole time you actually defeated Dr blizzard knocked him out
1:08:40
cold you're not the Justice Guild of America what a ridiculous accusation i'm a cat look you were all killed in battle
1:08:46
that's just fake news the media have been going after us for years this place is all delusion who would cast such a
1:08:52
spell i don't answer that i need an adult i am
1:09:00
what's that you ruined my stupid Martian you want the juice this is my world
1:09:06
you're all my lovable sexist andor racist puppets hey this is a Star Trek episode cuba these nuts in this timeline
1:09:13
the Cuban Missile Crisis resulted in nuclear warfare the Justice Guild were killed but the mediation gave a comic
1:09:20
book loving boy oh my god who is this boy who who me oh guys brain surgery you
1:09:26
can't hand into someone's head and rip out their brain pretty much you're one scary Martian man that's sexist andor
1:09:32
racist shut up Flash i have some troubling news
1:09:38
i must stop because we've been streaming for like over three hours um that was super fun though i wasn't quite sure
1:09:43
about these to be perfectly honest but like
1:09:48
the even though certain characters like Flash are very one note these are really fun
1:09:54
um so again great stream thanks for watching um I I still have yet more
1:10:01
stuff to do with my stream deck to make it suck less but join us tomorrow for
1:10:06
Atlas i think we need more players by the way um that's that's like co-op
1:10:11
justice League is nuts these are definite improvements this is like all I know about the show it's I'm sure it's
1:10:18
completely accurate representation of what the normal thing would be um so we'll definitely watch more of these there's um I think there's another like
1:10:26
hour of these in here so that would make another stream i think this worked
1:10:31
pretty well i think I can make this work the stream three streams at once thing i kind of wish I didn't have to do that
1:10:37
but like that way it's split out nice for like a search engine optimization stuff so like you can see just the uh
1:10:43
just the Justice League crap just the you know Jimmy Davis
1:10:56
stuff the packing is so quiet this way it's so weird to hear stuff on
1:11:02
headphones that you never had before anyway good night everyone
1:11:15
is this missing is this version missing part of the track or
1:11:21
something should be like I don't know what the [ __ ] instrument is but there's some kind of loud instrument missing during that part anyway
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