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Tiny wins build momentum.
Safety fuels change.
Progress doesn’t require pressure.
What’s one small step you’re choosing today? ✨
If this resonates, watch the full episode here: https://youtu.be/umUygQGI4Jo
#adaptablebehaviorexplained #gentlegoals #tinywins #nervoussystemhealing #intentionalgrowth
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0:00
But I start that moment in the morning
0:02
with like an act of tidiness and
0:05
completion and like culminating factor
0:08
of of the night and starting my day with
0:10
a kickoff. And so I feel better about
0:12
the whole day when I just make my bed.
0:14
And so I am someone who prefers to make
0:16
my bed in the morning. And when you do
0:18
little moments with tiny wins, you start
0:20
to feel more confident about your
0:23
outcomes. And those are really cool ways
0:26
to feel about yourself. So again, tiny
0:28
wins are something to focus on. Now,
0:31
we're going to talk about the idea of
0:33
ache from the overwhelm and burden of
0:36
goal setting and hope, which really
0:39
happen when you think about the idea of
0:41
change, especially if it lasts a long
0:44
time. Maybe you're tired of setting
0:46
goals that fizzle and you feel bad about
0:48
yourself because of it. Or maybe you're
0:50
afraid to try again because, you know,
0:52
you wonder if small things are even
0:54
enough or or like I'm talking about
0:56
today, gentle goals. Are they enough?
0:58
Well, here's what I have learned. That
1:00
is that rigid goals can feel like
1:02
judgment, not just from others but self.
1:04
Whereas gentle goals feel like an
1:06
invitation and it's supportive. It's not
1:09
shaming. And ultimately having a way
1:11
that just keeps us a nudge forward is a
1:14
good thing, right? Just a little bit
1:16
better every single day. So I want to
1:18
think about clients that discuss uh the
1:20
topic of exercise, which I hear about
1:22
because it is really a beneficial way to
1:24
reduce stress in the body. It's, you
1:26
know, science shows that there's
1:28
numerous outcomes that are awesome. And
1:30
so when you think about this coming up,
1:32
I this is a little bit of an
1:34
amalgamation of stories, but I'm
1:36
thinking about a client who wants to
1:38
exercise daily, but then thinks about
1:41
freezing at the thought and adding, you
1:43
know, the hour seven different days a
1:45
week. And um we we start by talking
1:48
about putting shoes on and walk to the
1:50
mailbox, you know, or plan to walk 2
1:53
minutes and back or 5 minutes and back.
1:55
And just inching towards something gets
1:58
the idea of movement. And telling
2:01
yourself, I want to be someone who
2:03
exercises
2:04
and then making those small steps is a
2:06
is a big win. And that micro step can
2:09
eventually become a habit if we
2:10
reproduce it. and eventually maybe it
2:13
turns into a daily walk which is
2:14
something that you know many clients
2:16
want to embody as far as their goals. So
2:19
now we're going to talk about tools for
2:21
gentle change. How do we create change
2:23
that lasts? One of the things that you
2:25
must do when it comes to goal setting is
2:27
practicing true vulnerability. You want
2:29
to share your hopes, your fears about
2:32
the change. You want to share the things
2:33
that you're committing to do and making
2:35
them real. You want to set healthy
2:37
boundaries about them. You know, say no
2:39
to the hustle culture. Yes, to rest. And
2:43
again, lead with curiosity when you run
2:44
into issues about why you weren't
2:46
successful. And then maybe readjust or
2:49
pivot. What's the smallest step that you
2:50
can take today toward that thing? And
2:53
keep the welcome mat out for yourself.
2:56
Like you belong even when you miss a
2:58
step. I get hard on myself a little bit
3:00
when it comes to like my house getting
3:02
too messy when I'm going in too many
3:04
directions and I've thrown things
3:06
everywhere and I have dishes building up
3:08
in my sink or things like that. And an
3:11
example might even be like today I saw
3:14
my sink and I was so frustrated and I
3:16
didn't think I had time to empty the
3:17
whole dishwasher and put dishes in, but
3:19
I thought I could start and then I ended
3:21
up having enough time. So even though I
3:23
didn't get to do my counters and put
3:24
everything away, I was able to do the
3:26
dishwasher and put dirty dishes in and
3:28
it felt like some accomplishment and I
3:30
looked at the kitchen and I
3:31
intentionally said that feels better.
3:34
And so I think it's important that you
3:36
give yourself permission to enjoy the
3:38
little wins and and recognize that it's
3:40
okay to be imperfect and that there's no
3:42
such thing as perfect. There's some
3:44
science behind the overwhelm that
3:46
happens when we are struggling with
3:48
these types of things and missing goals
3:51
and we end up with some shame around