Dating First Impressions

The importance of making a positive first impression on anyone-potential client or potential mate-cannot be emphasized enough. When we asked men who had just gotten engaged what attracted them to their fiancées when they first met, most said it was how classy, positive, energetic, enthusiastic, and upbeat their future wives were. Over and over, we heard answers such as, "She was so vivacious," or "She was enthusiastic"-or "bubbly," or "friendly." "I was immediately attracted to her," many of them told us. Interestingly, while 68 percent gave some sort of physical description of the woman they were about to marry, only about 20 percent of those men described their future wives as gorgeous or sexy, whereas more than 60 percent described their personalities. That was what attracted most of them in the first place. Even men who were marrying very beautiful women were more likely to emphasize their fiancée's personality over her physical beauty. They typically said things such as: "I took one look at her, and I knew she was the kind of person I wanted to be with." "She was so well mannered." "She was the kind of person any guy would be proud to be with." "She was enthusiastic." "She was so full of the joy of life." "She seemed so at ease with the world." "She was the kind of woman you could take anywhere and be proud." "When she talked, I felt so good." "I didn't know if we'd become lovers, but I was sure we'd be friends."