Breakup and Reconciliation: What to do differently

If begging, pleading and promising change is the ‘wrong’ behavior to exhibit after breakup, then it stands to reason that the ‘right’ behavior is the opposite. So, what is the opposite behavior? Well, let’s dump the begging, pleading and unreasonable demands you have made on yourself under a broad heading: “Undignified” – because that’s exactly what it is – undignified. So, the opposite is……that’s right, “Dignified”. As hard as it is, as much as your heart, head and soul wants to scream “Take me back please … I’ll do anything…. I can’t live without you….” to your ex, you must NOT… and instead act dignified. By all means, let your ex know that you are upset and that you would like a second chance – there is nothing wrong with discussing your feelings and desires (initially). Once you have done so however, consider your side of the breakup complete. Do not rehash the conversation and do not throw things that your ex may have said back in their face. Telling your ex: “But last week you said you loved me, and wanted to be the mother, father of my children” will ultimately achieve nothing except cause conflict. An ex’s words are not a binding contract and as such, cannot be used to tie them into an agreement that you thought you held with them. Arguing logic with someone who is making a decision based on emotion will prove fruitless. No matter how much logic you attempt to apply to an emotional decision, emotions will always win out.