0:01
dusk was setting in and everyone had
0:03
gone home except for Johnny It was the
0:06
last place he wanted to be right now
0:08
Instead he gazed at the stars that began
0:11
to emerge in the indigo twilight for
0:13
their debut now that the sun was taking
0:15
its exit from the stage leaving nothing
0:17
but a burnished glow on the horizon He
0:20
clenched the chains of the swing as if
0:22
it were a lifeline tilting his head back
0:24
further until he was looking directly up
0:26
into the center of the universe where
0:28
the blue had deepened to black and the
0:30
stars all peered at him like a tiny
0:32
billion eyes They had come to watch the
0:35
train wreck that became his life It
0:37
wasn't long before he heard footsteps
0:39
approaching lightly trudging their way
0:41
through the grassy lawn of Toro Park
0:44
towards his place on the swing He closed
0:46
his eyes for a moment somewhat agitated
0:49
He recognized those steps anywhere It
0:52
was amazing that someone with such a
0:53
boisterous and obnoxious personality
0:56
could carry themselves so lightly across
0:58
the earth as if they were raised among
1:00
mice He knew the truth though It was the
1:03
rats that raised them Reopening his eyes
1:05
but not taking them off the stars he
1:08
listened to the footsteps transition
1:09
from grass to tan bark Crunching their
1:12
way to take a place in the swing next to
1:14
him The wine of chains screeched against
1:17
the weight of a body that bore itself on
1:19
the seat groaning its last resistance as
1:22
they settled in They sat so quietly that
1:24
Johnny almost believed a ghost had been
1:26
messing with him "You're too quiet
1:28
Kaye." He barked at his sister finally
1:31
unsettled by her silence It was not
1:34
within her nature to keep her mouth shut
1:36
for more than 5 minutes "What you mean
1:39
you want me to talk this time?" she
1:42
retorted Johnny huffed more annoyed with
1:45
her now that she had a valid point and
1:47
glanced at her Kayle's head hung low her
1:50
amber hair acting as a wispy curtain
1:52
that covered her face and she seemed to
1:54
be looking down at her hands clasped
1:56
neatly in her lap She was grinding her
1:58
dirty sneakers into the tan bark
2:00
burrowing her foot into the ground as if
2:02
it sought to hide from the truth of
2:04
everything Then as if right on Q Kaye
2:08
blurted out the thoughts she seldom put
2:10
through a filter or kept to herself I
2:13
don't think Dad is coming back this time
2:15
Yeah how so johnny was indifferent to
2:18
this revelation but decided to humor her
2:21
for once glancing back up at a sky
2:23
obscured by the metal pipeline of the
2:25
swing set It's been 2 weeks since he
2:27
left Normally he's gone for 5 days at
2:31
most and even then he calls at least
2:33
once He would tell us if he won big at
2:36
the slots or if he crapped out and was
2:39
coming home No matter what he would call
2:43
This time it has been what 9 days since
2:46
we last heard from him Kaye had launched
2:49
into her anxious tail spin of recounting
2:52
the last two weeks with a cadence like
2:54
she was gossiping about the latest drama
2:56
amongst her friends as if Johnny needed
2:58
the recap He sighed as she continued her
3:01
tirade continuing to look up at the sky
3:04
There were more stars more bright eyes
3:08
coming out to watch these children on
3:10
the swing Not to mention in his last
3:12
phone call Dad said he found another
3:14
girlfriend What was her name again holly
3:16
Hannah whatever it is he did that thing
3:19
again where he swears that she's the one
3:22
and he's going to bring her home to be
3:23
our new mom And it's different this time
3:26
Johnny knew the tale all too well He and
3:28
his sister lived it many times Their
3:31
father would bring home some bimbo he
3:33
picked off the Vegas strip and demand
3:35
they call her mom Things would be hunky
3:37
dory for 2 weeks at most until dad ran
3:40
out of money and mom would up and
3:42
disappear Dad gets depressed drinks
3:44
himself into oblivion talking about the
3:47
good old days Then decides he's going to
3:50
get back to the strip to make his
3:51
fortune We'll live like kiddo you'll see
3:54
He could hear his father's voice echoing
3:57
in his mind The same thing he always
4:00
told Johnny as he stepped out the front
4:01
door for the eenth time Like a rat on an
4:04
exercise wheel the man was running to
4:06
the same place and going nowhere So what
4:09
if he's found another girlfriend doesn't
4:12
that mean he's coming back soon you know
4:14
when the cash piles up Detective Monk
4:16
johnny asked his sister in a dismissive
4:18
tone kicking himself in a light swing
4:21
the chain grinding in protest of motion
4:23
Kaye stopped digging her foot and shot
4:25
him a look in the bleak lighting of
4:28
nearby street lights flickering to life
4:30
He could see that he hit a nerve No
4:33
Jonathan That's exactly my point She
4:36
drew out his full name in retaliation
4:39
and he clenched his jaw He hated being
4:41
named after the deadbeat that was
4:43
supposed to be taking care of them
4:44
Before he could deliver a comeback Kaye
4:47
looked away from him hearing her draw a
4:49
shaky breath What if he has found the
4:52
one that makes him never come back her
4:54
voice trembled in a way that made Johnny
4:57
angry at her his dad the stars
5:02
everything So he snapped kicking himself
5:05
into a full swing now So what if that
5:08
rat bastard never comes back it's the
5:11
best thing he ever did for us No more
5:14
empty promises no more fake moms We'll
5:17
be free of him Johnny thought many times
5:20
about what he would do if his dad never
5:22
returned home anticipating how to make
5:24
ends meet He thought how he was old
5:27
enough to get a worker's permit and
5:28
would have to quit school to get a job
5:30
for both of them to get by He didn't
5:32
feel bad about leaving high school It
5:34
sucked anyway All his friends had moved
5:36
or getting ready for college which was
5:38
never his scene to begin with Plus he
5:41
thought to himself I can always go back
5:43
in a few years after Kaye graduates to
5:46
finish my degree With each pump of his
5:49
legs the swing groaned its displeasure
5:51
with each attempt to catapult him into
5:53
the universe Johnny looked at the stars
5:56
drawing closer and then farther away as
5:59
he made himself a human pendulum He felt
6:02
envious of those stars They mocked him
6:05
with their consistent indifference and
6:07
the distance they held from the world's
6:09
problems So on his next upswing he
6:13
shouted his truth to the heavens the one
6:16
that had been building up for 2 weeks
6:18
when his so-called father walked out the
6:20
door for the last time I'm glad he's
6:22
gone Johnny fell back to the earth his
6:25
feet contacting the ground again He
6:27
roughly skid himself to a violent halt
6:30
with chunks of dirt and wood spraying
6:32
out beneath his heels panting heavily
6:34
from his effort He snarled victoriously
6:37
towards the night sky before giving way
6:39
to devastated size tears leaking from
6:42
his eyes He resented that he had to
6:45
think about this stuff at 17 years old
6:48
Rather than living up his last summer
6:50
before senior year he instead had to
6:52
figure out how to put food on the table
6:54
and keep the roof over his head I'm
6:57
scared," Kaye whispered to him her voice
7:00
shaking and uncertain Johnny quickly
7:02
wiped his eyes and turned to look at his
7:05
younger sister Despite the warmth of the
7:07
night she trembled in the dark gripping
7:10
her hands together so tight that her
7:12
white knuckles glowed against the
7:14
darkness She was 2 months from her 13th
7:17
birthday and already the weight of the
7:19
world was pushing heavy on her shoulders
7:22
Johnny decided that although they shared
7:24
the same name he did not have to share
7:26
the same fate that befell his father Me
7:29
too He responded to her softly and then
7:32
stood from his seat letting the swing
7:34
drift gently away from him Let's go home
7:37
I'll make us some bacon mac He bribed
7:39
Kaye with her favorite meal offering a
7:42
hand to help her up She hesitated
7:44
momentarily before nodding and taking
7:46
his hand to walk the half mile back home
7:49
The swings drifted gently in the empty
7:51
air for a little while after they left
7:53
before finding their stillness suspended
7:56
in abandoned silence The stars blinking
7:59
and flickering continued to watch the
8:02
world as they always did before
8:04
disappearing within the blurry dawn of a