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Hitman on Switch 2 is INSANE – You Won’t Believe This Port!
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Jul 11, 2025
Hitman is officially running on the Nintendo Switch 2… and it looks absolutely insane! From stealth kills to smooth framerate, this version might be the best console port yet. Join me as I dive into gameplay, graphics, and whether this proves the Switch 2 is truly next-gen. Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and turn on notifications for more deep dives into Switch 2 performance, ports, and upcoming games! #Hitman #NintendoSwitch2 #Switch2Gameplay #HitmanSwitch2 #Agent47 #Switch2Port #NintendoDirect #NextGenGaming #StealthGames #8BitEric DISCLAIMER: This video contains opinions and humor based on publicly available information. It is not intended to harass or defame anyone. Chat Rules: NO SPOILERS OF ANY KIND. GAMES, MOVIES, TV ETC. Don't Be ANNOYING or a JERK. NO BACKSEAT GAMING. Thank you for watching! Be sure to like, subscribe and turn notifications on to keep up-to-date on all of my content. Join this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSxLDHfK2yzL7jhCJWG7EPg/join
View Video Transcript
0:10
[Music]
0:16
All right, we can go ahead play some Hitman. I
0:21
played this before on Xbox and PlayStation and all that, but I got a Nintendo Switch 2 code sent my way uh
0:29
the other day, so I was wanting to go ahead and just play this for a little bit. Uh what's up, Skizo Sweets? What's
0:35
up, everybody? How you guys doing? Come on in. File up.
0:42
Yeah, you're first. Uh Skitso Skitso Sweets, you are first. Welcome to
0:48
the stream. Season of the high stakes. Show details.
0:55
Page can't be explained. It says uh so I suck at this game.
1:01
Um
1:10
I have played it a long time ago, but I've always been kind of garbage at it. So we're going we're going to get
1:16
reacquainted with it. What's up, Scooby? What's up, CQ? What's up, Magic Tom? What's up, Argu? What's up, everybody?
1:23
Welcome to the channel. I've always been kind of garbage at this game, so we'll play. Uh, hopefully I
1:31
don't suck so much. Hopefully I don't suck that much.
1:44
Yeah, Saturday should be good. Saturday should be good. I'll be on Scooby's um
1:49
podcast on Saturday. So, I'm play I've played this on the Xbox before. I've
1:54
played this on the PlayStation. Hell, I even think I've played it on
1:59
Switch OG if I'm not mistaken. Uh but this is the Switch 2 version. Welcome to the agent program initiate.
2:06
I'll be waiting for you. So, we're going to be checking this one out.
2:13
This is uh Hitman uh World of Assassination Signature Edition. It's on the Switch 2. It's a game key card if
2:21
you uh if you buy physically, but I have I got a digital code, so I didn't
2:26
This was given to me as a uh a review code. I'll take you to your quarters. Someone likes to keep secrets.
2:33
Secrets. Pardon me if I sound a little tired. I am [ __ ] exhausted. You have a few of your own. I've had a
2:39
hell of a last couple days, man. Hell of a last couple days. So, I'm just
2:45
tapped out. Tapped out. Well, that you guys noticed I haven't uploaded any
2:51
videos all week since uh since Monday.
2:57
Just been super busy with uh file, real life stuff, wrestling stuff. Hardly text, but I
3:03
You think you have this platinum? Nice. Tell me, what did it feel like taking
3:08
lives? Random, disordered. Is that why you came here? Why you let
3:15
us test you? I always thought these games were interesting cuz you could do things multiple ways. Like there's no there's
3:21
no set way to beat a stage. You could do like multiple different ways of um
3:30
of actually completing the levels and stuff. So, I always found it fun. If you guys
3:36
haven't played, sure about this. What's up, VJC? There are no second chances, Miss Burnwood. Not here.
3:41
I choose him. May I inquire why? A blank slate, antisocial, apathetic, and unresponsive.
3:49
No doubt the boy shows promise. But perhaps I see possibility where others see limitation. Isn't that what a handle
3:55
does, sir? We'll see. Anyone can kill Miss Burnwood.
4:00
He still remembers nothing. If he does, he's not sharing. We will check up on his story. The
4:06
hospital in Romania. You know how I feel. Oh, dude. Exactly. Bro, looks like he should be voiced by vehicle identification number diesel.
4:15
I don't understand the reference, but that Welcome to Advanced Mission Training.
4:21
This operation originally took place in Sydney. The target was So, this is like the tutorial stage.
4:27
We're going to be uh practicing the tutorial. You will need Infiltrate the yacht. Isolate and eliminate your target and
4:34
exfiltrate all without arousing suspicion. And remember, Vin Diesel
4:40
agent, you are the most Okay, I get it. I don't understand when you said vehicle
4:45
identification number. I was like, what? I didn't get the
4:51
good. Didn't get the reference. Oh, bird talk. Thank you so much.
4:59
I don't know why I didn't give an alert, but thank you so much. It should be given alert.
5:05
Give an alert to birdin. There we go.
5:10
If you got a membership, guys, feel free to send a thank you. Thank you, Bird Talk. You've been awesome lately. I
5:16
appreciate that. Let's get a Don Marco.
5:22
[Music] What's up, Retro Elbow?
5:28
Hey everybody. Hey everybody. All right, so I suck at this game.
5:36
But sucking is part of the fun, isn't it?
5:45
Yeah. Thank you, Bird Talk, for gifting the memberships. If you guys got one, be sure to hit that. Thank you.
5:51
Sneak up and subdue him.
5:59
I always get my Y's and my X's confused
6:04
cuz I've been playing Xbox a little bit so I get the Y's, the X's, the A's, all
6:10
that confused a little bit. Might just work though. People do tend to see uniforms, not faces. Be cautious
6:16
though. I always thought it was funny that your guy's bald as [ __ ]
6:21
and you put the disguises on and it's like nobody realizes. I guess the disguise
6:29
just keeps them secret enough.
6:35
I don't [ __ ] know.
6:47
Hey everybody. All right, let's go, baby. Pull the [ __ ] up.
6:52
This particular uniform should get you access through the staff entrance. Just act normal.
7:01
Hold on. That mechanic with his back turned, he's what we call an enforcer. He knows his crew and he'll see right.
7:07
So he'll right see right through the line of sight. You're in. Well done, initiate.
7:14
Right. You don't waste any time, do you? Start by locating your target,
7:20
especially on blue sky. What's up? This is uh Hitman World of Assassination.
7:27
Please comply. All right, we got to wait for his ass. You got to watch out for these guys that
7:33
have the uh the circles above their heads.
7:44
So, they're going to stop me. No mechanics here. So, now we're going to come over here and I believe you throw a wrench at the
7:51
dude. Assimilation is the name of your game. You'll need a better disguise.
7:58
What's up, Ed? Says, "This is sad. Just quit." Uh, I don't know, man. Sometimes
8:03
I have like 200, 300 people in here, so leave a mark. Takes a minute for people to get in here. How many people would
8:09
you have if you decided to live stream, buddy? That's a question for me.
8:15
Uh, from me to you. Okay. Unlike mechanics, the cabin crew
8:20
is allowed upstairs access. I see what you're getting at. Very unorth.
8:27
Yeah. Yeah. I didn't ever see the movie, but
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familiar with some of the games. It's been a minute since I played Hitman. I think the last time I played was when it
8:37
first came out um on uh
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whatever the [ __ ] last the the the last update they had.
8:55
Yeah. It's funny, isn't it? game man's
9:05
private deck. Now we're getting somewhere. Ah, but according to intel, Ritter is another
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enforcer who picks his own cabin. All right, so we're going to come over here. We're going to bartend a little bit.
9:16
The target will spot you if you get too close to eend.
9:22
So, I've done this thousands of [ __ ] times. There's different ways to do stuff, though. like you could poison uh
9:28
food, you could loosen up stuff. Uh it just depends how you want to get, which
9:34
the approach of this game is to uh to finish stuff in different ways.
9:43
What's up, Trace?
9:51
Mr. Norfolk, so good of you to fly down. Can I offer you a drink? Oh no.
9:56
Yes, this is Hitman. I uh it should say it in the uh the description, but I also mentioned it a
10:02
couple times. This is on the Switch, too, guys. I'm playing this on the Switch, too. So, this is a Switch 2 version of Hitman
10:10
uh World of Assassination. Nice impression. If we win, you can fix
10:16
me a drink. Anyway, sounds like Ritter is about to have a private meeting with the gentleman in white.
10:22
This could be useful. Sometimes I accidentally go guns blazing.
10:30
Tie diddy. Tie Diddy to the drink.
10:36
Sorry. Doesn't want to be disturbed. Try sneaking around the back. Thing is, I could have sworn it was
10:43
stolen from this. Wow. So, you got the blueprints.
10:50
Most impressive. I know there's a pretty cool stage that takes place like at a mansion with like a [ __ ] Illuminati
10:57
party. Not my usual scene technology. Most of my clients are art collectors. So what
11:04
is it anyway? Some type of reactor. Well, uh, not just a reactor, Mr.
11:11
Ritter. It's more of work. Now we play the waiting. 50 years time. Maybe even more. Maybe 75
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or 100. I I don't mean to boast, but whoever
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makes it to market first, this reactor. So, we're going to shoot this guy as soon as there's a clearance.
11:31
Well, I'm rooting for you. Now is your chance. Use your silent pistol.
11:38
The client will notice. What?
11:47
I don't know how you [ __ ] unequip.
12:01
Get this guy off of me. Help me.
12:08
I don't know how you unequip. Wait, it didn't [ __ ] eliminate the
12:14
dude. package. Bro, how did the guy not die?
12:21
Restart. How did homie not [ __ ] die? I just
12:28
shot his ass, did I not?
12:34
What's up, Master Roshi? I haven't played this in [ __ ] forever, man.
12:41
I just shot the [ __ ] How did he not [ __ ] die? Normal.
12:47
Right now for the tricky part. Start by locating your target. Intel suggests around the barest.
12:58
Hello there. So, what's everybody else up to today? What did y'all do for y'all's Thursday
13:05
night? I got a wrestling show tomorrow evening, so I probably won't be home until after midnight.
13:12
But I I do I might live stream tomorrow. We'll see. Um Saturday I'll be on
13:19
Scooby's podcast to be expected. So I'll tweet out a link for that.
13:24
If assimilation is the name of your game, you'll need a better disguise.
13:35
I like that you just throw a [ __ ] wrench. That's going to leave a mark. Good thing we have insurance right at that motherfucker's [ __ ]
13:41
face. Okay. Unlike mechanics, the cabin crew
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is allowed upstairs. So, Superman Cool. No spoilers, no nothing. I'm going to check it out
13:52
probably uh Saturday or Sunday.
13:57
So, I'm going completely blind. I don't even want to know if you liked it.
14:04
Do a jump kick, says VJC. What's up, Jenkins? The target's private deck. Now, get him
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somewhere. Ah, but according to intel, Ritter is another
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enforcer who picks his own cabin. So, tread carefully.
14:23
Yeah, I might go Saturday or Sunday. It just honestly depends.
14:30
The sparrow cannot die. You're not a superhero, Calvin. They
14:35
don't exist. Not with that attitude. They don't.
14:45
Yeah, no problem. Scooby, what's up? Uh, Looney Gamer. Somebody tried to be a
14:51
smart alec in the um the replies to the tweet. I just ignored it.
15:00
Mr. Norfolk, so good of you to fly down. Can I offer you a drink? Oh, no. Thank you. No. Uh, not before 6.
15:09
My wife is very insistent about that. What's up, Maxim? My sympathies. So, excellent timing. I
15:17
just had the computer set up in my office. Shall we? Yes, please. You miss movie tying games? Yeah. Back
15:23
in the day, everything used to have like a a movie or TV show used to always have video games. Private meeting with a gentleman in
15:30
white. This could be useful.
15:42
Not a man of simple taste. That count.
15:58
It was on Twitter. Somebody was asking like in a smartass way if I donated or something like that just to be a [ __ ]
16:05
dick. Here, I'll pull the files for you. Not my usual scene technology. Most of
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my clients are art collectors. So, what is it anyway? Some type of reactor?
16:18
Well, uh, not just a reactor, Mr. Bitter. It's more of
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You're on the right track. Stay put. 50 years ahead of its time. Maybe even more. Maybe 75 or 100.
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I I don't mean to boast, but whoever makes it to market first with this
16:38
reactor will become the king of the Well, I'm rooting for you.
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Now is your chance. Use your silent pistol or the client will notice. Give me a second. That's why
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your target is done. Now head calmly towards an exit.
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Look at all those stupids. All right, there we go. I didn't shoot
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him right.
17:12
Did I play the old Seven Up game? I have. Cool Spot. Cool Spot. That game was [ __ ] hard
17:18
though. The red car marks your excfiltration point. Simply push the button and you're in the clear. But it was pretty cool.
17:29
Here we go. Advanced mission training complete. And may I say, elegantly done, initiate. I
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guess my hunch was right about you. I look forward to the final test.
17:46
You only play the food tiein. Uh yeah, Yonoid was great on the NES. Yonoid was
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a lot of fun, actually. How did you know? I told you he had talent.
17:58
His stats are off the charts. Such skills and reflexes.
18:03
They could only be the result of previous training. Power like that with no moral restraint, it could be
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dangerous. I thought that was rather the point, sir. All agents have weak spots, Miss
18:16
Burnwood. Pressure points to keep them in check. But this one,
18:22
well, they had Superman in the past on Fortnite. They had um perhaps it would be better.
18:27
They had a Superman on the battle pass and then they had a Superman on uh this battle pass. So, this is the second
18:33
time there's been a a Superman. It's a different a different looking skin, but
18:39
they definitely have play. They've definitely had more than one Superman in the past on the game.
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Welcome back, initiate. As an agent, every I think the other one was called Clark
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Kent. Complete this exercise again. This time attacking it from a different angle.
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Vary your strategy. Improvise. I think they called him Clark Kent on
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it.
19:30
See, there's all these uh
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there's all these different challenges and stuff. I'm not that good though.
19:54
What's up, knucklehead? How you doing, man?
20:28
I think I suck at this game. Pretty good.
20:46
For some reason, I was decent when I first played it, like on Xbox. I don't know why I'm not that great at
20:52
it anymore, but it definitely seems like uh
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I want to take the guard outfit.
21:19
Doing okay. Good. I just don't know how you would take the guard outfit
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or even this dude's outfit.
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Let's explore a little bit.
21:44
Yeah, I'm using the um the O andN controller that I got from uh
21:53
from Walmart. It's like 20some bucks. It's pretty cheap. It's the only one I
21:58
ever really use. I don't have uh an actual pro controller.
22:17
Such an eye for detail. How does it look? I mean, it looks okay. This comparable to uh what I played
22:25
on a boat like this uh previously. There's always something to fix.
22:43
This is not the goddamn hanger, son. We can't have any grease monkeys tinkering about here. Okay.
22:49
Grease monkeys. Who you calling a grease monkey?
22:56
You plan getting a rogue ally? I hear you. Hey, wait a minute.
23:12
The Xbox one they have looks pretty cool.
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Found the General Lee and CM uh Cyber Punk. I was going to say CM Punk. Yeah, it's in there somewhere on Cyberpunk.
23:26
seems pretty cool. There's a lot of Easter eggs and stuff on Cyberpunk.
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Trying to see if there's a different way to do uh the kill than what I did.
23:58
Why is there something glowing over there?
24:04
CM Punk 2077 would be the best change ever. Yeah, I almost said CM Punk 2077.
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That's actually kind of funny, isn't it?
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Yeah, I checked out a little bit of uh Liberty City.
24:28
It's a pretty tough little game to be honest.
25:00
All
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right. I don't know what I'm I'm trying a different way. Can I drag him into there? I do not
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think I can. All right, we're good. I should just break his [ __ ] neck.
25:43
Just break your [ __ ] neck. I think that uh I think that causes
25:50
problems, but we're good.
26:01
saw this painting an original Gorka. Thing is, I could have sworn it was stolen from the
26:08
Hey, you there? Yeah.
26:14
You fishy fella. Who are you?
26:19
Sir, I am talking to you. Holy [ __ ]
26:36
Can we hide in here? [Laughter] What's up, Snape?
26:43
What's up? Definitely not Wayne. How you guys doing?
27:01
I'm having an all right night.
27:07
It's an all right night. It's all right. Wow. Lots of security here.
27:24
Ah, security. You look well prepared. I was hoping I'm just [ __ ] around trying to figure
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out the other [ __ ] achievements. Imagine failing to do this in VR. I
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didn't they do Yeah, they did do a Hitman VR. I just didn't play it. I can't do VR that long.
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I feel like I [ __ ] up by putting the [ __ ] guard outfit on. I think I just want to play one of the actual [ __ ]
28:01
stages. Let's exit.
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Good evening, 47. Yeah, VR gives me vertigo, too. Show by Sanuin, one of Europe's leading
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coo spawn killer. I haven't been paying attention at all to be completely honest. I've been
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out of the loop the last couple days, a retired supermodel, an iconic gaming
29:00
for Jesus Christ and two of the most dangerous people in the world.
29:06
Novikov and Margolus are in fact the ring leaders of Iago,
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an enigmatic spy ring that deals in the global elite's most valuable secrets. Unscrupulous and opportunistic, Iago has
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caused disastrous security leaks all over the globe. When Crimean separatists caused a deadly meltdown at the Adessa
29:26
nuclear power plant, Iago gave them access to the plant security network.
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And when the Delgado drug cartel shot down the plane of President store all of it. I mean, I guess
29:37
Iago provided the classified flight plans.
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Now, Nvikov and Mgolus have obtained a knock list of British undercover agents, which they plan to sell at a secretgo
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auction during the Sanguin show. So, our client MI6 need us to stop the ring
29:55
leaders before the knock list ends up in the wrong hands.
30:01
The Sandwin show will be swarming with security and Victor Novikov will be the focus of everyone's attention. But
30:07
despite his posturing, he is merely the moneyman. The real target is Dalia Mgolus. Beautiful and brilliant. She is
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a master manipulator and the true brains behind. Two targets, a highly public event.
30:22
At first glance, an impossible task. Then again, I do know how you love a
30:29
challenge. I will leave you to prepare.
30:44
Gay is gay and money's money. What's up, Collectic Movement? Appreciate it.
30:50
Thank you. I appreciate that. Thank you. Thank you.
31:03
All right, let's try not to [ __ ] this up. Let's try not to
31:10
Let's try not to [ __ ] this up, shall we? Hitman for Smash Bros., you're upset we
31:18
might not get another perfect dark remake. I mean, thank thank uh Microsoft for [ __ ] that up or Rare or whoever's
31:24
in charge. Welcome to Paris 47. The show is just
31:30
about the red carpet event of the season and the guest list is a veritable who's who of the global fashion elite. You
31:36
will find Victor Novikov basket in the spotlight while Daria hosts the heavily guarded auction on the second floor for
31:43
a group of top customers. Now, event security will keep a watchful
31:49
eye on suspicious activity, but I trust your timeless look shall fit right in.
31:54
Good luck, 47.
32:13
Feels like an Illuminati party. the big ass [ __ ] mansions and [ __ ]
32:27
Damn. What's up, girl? I've done this before. I just don't
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remember [ __ ] That is Victor Noikov, head of Sanguin
32:40
and ring leader of quite the resume.
32:50
They're supposed to be getting Tony Hawk 3 and four uh this week though on Game Pass.
32:56
A pleasure as always. But make sure to join Dalia and I for a drink later.
33:01
There's someone we would like you to meet. So I'll be playing that maybe now. Hold on.
33:07
Maybe tomorrow night. He's what? I just remembered I had something I had
33:12
to [ __ ] do. Give me a second. Urgent matter. Do enjoy your evening.
33:18
Goddamn artists. What the hell does he do now?
33:41
All right.
33:56
Wait one second, guys.
34:01
I [ __ ] forgot I was supposed to take care of something. I'll just do it later. I'll do it later.
34:09
What's up, Zucky?
34:21
Tony might be available right now. Maybe after midnight it might.
34:30
I wish I had that jaw. Stop. You look fine. I know I look fine, but he's like a like
34:37
a Greek god or something, you know? I can't believe he's actually here, you
34:42
know, like in the same room as us. Helm Krueger's been my role. According to our intel, Helmet Krueger
34:49
is friendly with Dalia Margolus. I suspect that he model since college.
34:54
Well, so if he kisses your hand, will you ever watch it again? Yeah. Yeah. I saw you blush earlier when
34:59
you put on Where's Helmet Krueger at? Sorry. No access here. Please move on. I
35:07
don't have time to argue with you.
35:13
Listen to this music.
35:35
Oh, Pro Skater was great back in the day. Sir, you can't come through here. Sorry.
35:42
Speaking of, please move on. That guy looks a lot like Helm Krueger. Huh? Yeah. Uncanny.
36:00
Why get dark all of a sudden? Uh, thanks. Don't get too close. Thank
36:07
you. But I'm not interested.
36:16
Uh, I have a lot of gas right now. Remember the last time I played this, I got the guard to follow me into the
36:23
women's. Sir, I don't recognize you, so you can't come through here. Sorry.
36:49
God damn it. Hey, who just left this here like this? Seriously. Hey.
37:04
All right, there we go.
37:20
All right, we're good. We're in good business.
37:26
I don't think I know you. Hey. Yeah, you you [ __ ] know me.
37:32
Hey, stop. Please. Really? Uh you mail in catalog. That's right.
37:47
Talking about an auction or something up on the second floor. What the hell is that?
37:56
I remember I electrocuted homie over here.
38:15
Love it. Love it. Oh. Oh, it's perfect.
38:26
[Music] All right.
38:32
I'm trying not to get [ __ ] busted.
38:41
[Music]
38:50
AB Super. It'd be nice if I wear a Superman suit. Could you imagine if I went and bought a Superman outfit and
38:56
live streamed wearing it? That'd be hilarious, actually.
39:02
No says, "Watch my back." Who's behind me?
39:20
[Music] Dalia, helmet. Not yet. I I go on in a few cycles, I
39:28
think. I have I think I may Porsche person want to be clear on a few
39:34
details. Fine. I'll I'll be up after the show.
39:40
Yes. Ciao. Hope you know what you're doing. Helmet.
39:48
Can never have too much security. Am I right?
39:56
Yeah. Dan, it's me. Oh, you're watching the live feed. All right.
40:01
No, not anytime soon. Actually, I'm I'm doing this thing for Dalia Margolus.
40:09
It might take a while. Don't ask.
40:15
Of course, you'll get your 10%, man. Look, don't know that I'm past my prime.
40:23
There's no way but down, Dan. And it's not like I've been an aesthetic here,
40:30
but this way I do this, I can leave the game with some startup cash. A lot of
40:37
startup cash, actually. And I can go into business on my own.
40:43
Well, I'm I'm thinking facial products, maybe underwear. Anyway, I got to go.
40:49
No, I'm not. I was being followed, but I'm trying to uh
40:56
Take care of this guy. Dalia Marus,
41:01
why do I feel like I'm playing with fire here? Don't think like that, Elwood. Don't
41:07
think like that. Think of the money. It's only temporary.
41:12
I need to [ __ ] try to get this guy alone, though. These guys are all about to strike one
41:19
around here. There we go.
41:40
Dump him over. What's up, game changers? Um,
41:46
I don't know if there's any asset. There might be.
42:00
There might be some asset. Dalia helmet here. Remind me again. Where were we supposed to meet?
42:06
Second floor. Voltater suite next to the auction. Got it. You want me to drop by now or?
42:12
No. No. It's essential that you walk the runway. Do the job and come see me right
42:17
away. All right, let's go get the makeup done.
42:32
Well, at least this line looks like real.
42:38
How we doing?
42:45
Look where you're going, mister. Mr. Krueger, need a touchup, I see. No
42:50
problem. Just sit back and relax. Won't take a second. Appreciate
43:29
There you are all set, Mr. Krueger.
43:34
Good work. Wow. Thanks, Mr. Krueger. Break a leg.
44:07
Sorry, Chad. And I'm reading something.
44:18
Okay. I had something I had to take care of and I [ __ ] didn't do it.
44:23
So, I wonder if I'm too late.
44:31
Let's walk the floor.
44:40
It's the world.
44:53
Modeling is so [ __ ] weird. It's such a weird [ __ ] like
44:59
profession to be completely honest.
45:10
Isn't it
45:36
[Music] that I see. It's your show, Sebastian.
45:48
I forgot how you go upstairs.
45:56
Been in a fashion show with your sister. It's such a weird thing.
46:01
I've always thought modeling was kind of weird.
46:15
So yeah, some people do like that kind of stuff,
46:23
especially now when it's like very like European weird.
46:34
Why can't we go upstairs? I'm not going to watch Miss University.
46:45
Wow. Never knew this.
46:57
The [ __ ] stairs at
47:09
There we go. gun by its holster. Tell you that woman
47:15
is smarter than you and I and everyone we know put together. I think this is where you either poison
47:22
her or you make the chandelier fall on her. I don't remember how you [ __ ] do
47:27
it. access to the auction and a private audience with Dalia Margolus.
47:34
Nicely done. Please have a seat.
47:44
So, Hel, you accept my offer? I'm in. What's the job? Straight to the point. I like it. As it
47:51
happens, I have the perfect assignment for you. Jessica Hymore. Hymore Consulting. the very same. That's
47:59
why I wanted you in the show, so Jessica would notice you. Now, I want you to go
48:04
to New York, seek out Jessica, and do what you do best. The girl is bright,
48:11
young, beautiful. Should be right up your alley. And yet, she's knocked the mark. My You do catch on fast. No, that would
48:19
be her father, CEO John Hymore. Jessica is your way in. Befriend him. Get his
48:26
trust. Hymore Consulting is planning a merger. I want to know with whom and at what price.
48:32
All right, consider it done. That's for you. Keep it on you at all times.
48:38
Last resort. Cyanide. Good choice.
48:47
We've got trouble.
49:01
Yes. Well, it's a little late now, isn't it?
49:08
No. No. I'm going to deal with this immediately. Selena's a big girl. She knew what she was getting into.
49:14
Ain't I supposed to [ __ ] put it in there? Pull her out. Fine. We'll talk later.
49:24
Did my game glitch?
49:31
Sorry about that, Hel. So, a toast to a fruitful collaboration
49:36
here. Here. Forgotten your manners.
49:47
It's not giving me an option to [ __ ] poison it.
50:00
financial sector.
50:05
Well, if you can't be bothered with basic courtesy, I'm afraid I can't use you. You think about that helmet long
50:12
and hard. I'll call you tomorrow, maybe.
50:21
Someone help me. Well done. Victor Novikov is next.
50:29
I unnoticed killed her somehow. I don't know how I did it, but [ __ ] it.
50:35
I'll take the [ __ ] notice kill.
50:44
Yeah, that flood. The flood's pretty [ __ ] brutal, man. And I feel bad for all the families affected. Especially
50:51
the kids. The kids that passed away tragically.
50:57
That's [ __ ] sad.
51:03
I don't give a [ __ ] I killed that [ __ ]
51:10
I was supposed to poison her, but it wasn't allowing me to poison her [ __ ] [ __ ]
51:18
You can electrocute the dude in here. I've done it before.
51:26
[Music]
51:45
the remix to Ignition. You're seeing an R. Kelly up in this hoe.
51:53
Honey, I love the hair. That's Is that Is that a new haircut?
51:59
What are you thinking? I didn't mean to. Yeah, you better.
52:10
I'm just gonna follow this dude. Everyone fine. A fine show everyone. Sebastian will take the stage in just a
52:16
moment. So, let's wrap this baby up in style. All right, that is all.
52:22
Dismissed. Ladies and gentlemen, will take the stage.
52:35
You seem tense, Sebastian. Here's a tip. Always start with a joke.
52:41
Get on stage, prick. Yes, you're on. Attitude
52:47
and go, go, go.
53:00
I need to kill this guy. R. Kelly gets no play around you. Less
53:07
respect. Yeah, it sucks cuz there were some R. Kelly songs I liked. Now, ladies and gentlemen, please give a
53:13
warm hand to the true star tonight, Sebastian.
53:20
There were some R. Kelly songs that I liked. I'm not going to lie.
53:29
Thank you. You are too really too kind.
53:37
I have been told that these are my most accessible designs yet. But don't let
53:43
the bright colors and the classical cuts fool you. No. No.
53:49
The themes I'm exploring here are perhaps my darkest yet. I have explored
53:54
feelings of powerlessness, duress,
53:59
coercion, the notion that that free will is only
54:05
an illusion that we are all controlled by sinister forces cynically preying on our vices
54:12
and weaknesses. Like the pleasant design suggest, we put
54:19
on a brave face. Why is my [ __ ] mask of normality controller moving by itself? I better
54:25
not have [ __ ] drift successful and above all
54:31
in control. But deep down, all right,
54:37
who really is? Thank you.
54:44
and good night. I need to figure out how to kill this dude.
55:14
Already done.
55:29
Come on, [ __ ] I'm killing your ass the second I get
55:34
think he's going out to his helicopter.
55:42
Call your controller Fast and Furious. Well, yeah, pretty much. Despite St. Clair making threats and
55:48
Sato having a meltdown, I'd say the show is a big success. Usher was good. He had his moments.
55:53
Usher Usher had some of his moments. So, you plan to buy off St. clear or the
56:01
other way. All in good time. For now we celebrate. Well, I
56:08
celebrate. You watch and Kurt.
56:14
Remember what we discussed earlier? I won't forget. Yeah, I have an 8bit dude. I have a couple 8bit dudes. I haven't tried them on the switch, too, but I know they work
56:21
on switch one.
56:31
I try some good songs. Yeah, he has some good ones.
56:43
He had some bangers. Jesus, where are my peing duck rolls? I had them airlifted in from Lstrad in
56:49
London for God's sake. The least idiots can do is serve the damn things. Uh yes,
56:55
yes, sir. Mr. Novacov, right away.
57:00
Where's his duck rolls at? Can I poison them? Well, it's confirmed, sir. The charges
57:06
against
57:18
the job. Yeah, you are nameless, I guess. See, it's not letting me [ __ ] poison
57:25
[ __ ] This This worries me. I mean, who you go up to the food, but then it's not letting you [ __ ] poison it.
57:31
Enters a heavily guarded government building, kills an FSB section chief, and sets him up as a US spy without even
57:37
breaking sweat. Where'd you find this guy? See, that's the thing. He found me. He
57:44
knew the FSB were investigating my past. You see, it had the option to come right here,
57:50
but it won't let you do it. Do I got to be a [ __ ] guy like that?
57:56
Let's just say you let him do most of the talking. Was I ever a limp biscuit fan? Yeah, I had my moments as Limp Biscuit.
58:05
Well, I'll be damned. You and Dalia actually agree.
58:14
Come on back inside.
58:27
Dude, she didn't even [ __ ] notice.
58:41
She didn't even notice me. Kill the dude. Wow. Oh, look. I just went to a [ __ ] door.
58:50
I just went through a [ __ ] door. Did y'all see that? Are you sure of the name, Mr. Novakov?
58:58
Not impressed.
59:06
Yes. Let me [ __ ] pick up any of the [ __ ] drinks. Victor, there you are. Finally. Come
59:13
join us for a drink. Wakefield really wants to meet you. Did you know he flew in from a shoot in just like I can't
59:20
pick up the drink that's highlighted there? If Julian wants to play the movie that bad, he only had to ask.
59:28
Victor, you're so I've done this a lot easier in the past. Seriously, come. Come join us.
59:34
Perhaps later. There's something I need to attend to.
59:51
There he is. Victor, man of the hour. First of all, let me just say congratulations. Spectacular
59:58
show. Yes. Thank you. Thank you. Yes. Well, I knew from the very start that I'd have to completely rethink how San
1:00:10
Okay. See here, I did the screwdriver bit. And Sebastian, the public needs to know.
1:00:36
There we go. Check this out.
1:00:43
I'm going to go expose expose that wire.
1:01:03
Homie walked off that way last time I did it. I was able to [ __ ] kill his ass. It's been years.
1:01:10
Is this game physical? It's a game key card, but I have a download.
1:01:16
I should hope not, Victor. I know how you like it hot. After
1:01:23
you. No, thank you. I prefer a crowd. I just wanted to say this to your face.
1:01:30
Think about just [ __ ] flat out killing him. The ground is slipping.
1:01:36
I've seen the case and the FSB are building against you in Moscow.
1:01:42
Espionage, profitering, insider trading. Quite the page turn.
1:01:48
I see. Well, I hate to rain on your parade, dear Valerie, but I also know about the VIP lounge. What's
1:01:56
really going on up here? How exciting. If only I had time to
1:02:04
listen to your crackpot theories, Valerie. But alas, I have a show to run.
1:02:10
To be continued, I'm sure. So, the last time I played this, I just
1:02:16
had him walk into that [ __ ] water. Maybe this is it right here.
1:02:27
Yep. Got his ass. He's going to die.
1:02:42
Both targets are down. Great work. Now head towards an exit. There he goes, baby.
1:02:52
Doing the sanguine line, huh? Still no answer.
1:03:06
Told you guys I played this game before. I'm not stupid.
1:03:19
Definitely was zapped.
1:03:25
[Music]
1:03:32
Exit. Yeah, nobody cared. It seems like the AI
1:03:38
is a little wonky.
1:03:48
[Music]
1:04:07
GG's all around, baby. Damn, that took a [ __ ] half hour.
1:04:24
My bad.
1:04:49
How was Moscow? Camarov is gone. I set him up as a langu
1:04:54
spy. It's quite the scandal at the FSB. His death will not be investigated.
1:05:02
Your turn. Very well. The secrets of the global elite.
1:05:10
Five years of work. Everything we've collected. It's all Illuminati stuff in this game. This thing makes Wikileaks look like a
1:05:17
gossip rag. The pen beats the sword. Huh.
1:05:24
I have found that whoever wields the sword decides who holds the pen.
1:05:38
Smile, Victor. Your reputation is safe. Now run along. I'm sure you have pretty
1:05:45
dresses to attend to.
1:05:52
Victor, good luck with the show.
1:05:58
I have a feeling it's going to be the one you'll be remembered for.
1:06:18
I hate to do this, but I just realized I had something that I have to do by end of business day today. I just remembered
1:06:26
it. So, I'm gonna have to call it quits tonight. I'll be live tomorrow night, though, when I get home from wrestling.
1:06:32
Okay, I gotta go. I just realized I had a [ __ ] deadline that I missed. Sorry about that. I swear I'll be back
1:06:39
tomorrow night. Don't go anywhere, guys. I'll see you guys later. Apology.
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