FIFA Just Invented a Peace Prize and Guess Who Got It First

Look, we all know the drill by now: big event coming to America, big sporting body wants smooth sailing, suddenly there’s a shiny new global honor that somehow lands in the hands of the one guy who can sign (or not sign) whatever paperwork they might need down the line. So here we are: the “inaugural” FIFA Peace Prize — an award that didn’t exist last week — presented to Donald J. Trump by Gianni Infantino with all the subtlety of a halftime fireworks show. The citation praises “exceptional actions to promote peace and unity.” One assumes they’re referring to something other than the travel-ban years, the “very fine people” press conference, or the general vibe of 2020. It’s not corruption, it’s branding. It’s not a quid pro quo, it’s relationship-building. And it’s definitely not the least convincing peace prize since Yasser Arafat, Shimon Peres, and Yitzhak Rabin had to share one. It’s just… football being football. Welcome to the 2026 World Cup cycle, folks. It’s gonna be a long 18 months. #fifa