Pat and Jon - The Later Years (Goolfer Dood)

[Music]

r r r r

[Music]

r

hello d f dir

[Music]

[Music] hello I want to

youing me with that yes you're

me darn

it cut cut

cut

[Music]

I like no

more I hate this TV show where's the C changer

Sho this d k

for dying or something

e

cut bouncing on my

[Music] bed I love doing

flips I think I'm going to sleep

[Music]

[Music] now right

[Music]

there

breakfast what's your St coming through excuse me excuse me move it move it he

what your man what's your problem sure

gosh

M come onur need light it's not the much I got

turn St [Music]

little [Music]

so no problem those are C for

heart this is not short

[Music]

me [Music]

SP [Music] onion

[Music]

gar [Music]

[Music]

[Music] you're pretty friends

hello can I brother a CO

hello hello

hell oh no oh

no oh no what's up what's

[Music] up smell

good [Music]

cut G I love

what's

up girl

[Music] come here I want to take

you I have some

privacy

much

I'm telling you those toilet

see another hot

stuff I learn

[Music] my I'm back

and I'm bad what's up what's

up oh that was back breaking I'm turn on this

r c shoot can't get the St

[Music] R get fting

now yeah hey what's

up yeah

you

yeah run D what's

up well l [Music]

l

[Music]

[Music]

l [Music]

[Music]

around [Music]

[Music]

Sean H take one it's a

John [Music]

hul show yeah hello today we got Steve from the h

sitcom and also we got the the only known hippie living in the world

today rainbow of a family matters

hi hi can I do

this hi

stupid screwed up

here fall

okay me and I can't get up okay I'll

help you out thank you

okay you're good so I heard you been doing some stand up yes I

am where are you been here and um all over usually like I

can do it over here I can do it over here but is very good

yes I can't

see long way so what are these like super suspension suspenders you like

yo do the get down yeah

Dole so are you still after Laura yeah oh my sweet pancakes

with so does she like you anymore at all I don't

know I don't [Applause] know what so how is this show doing well

the critics say it's 5.2 good and 5.9

bad so I don't know that's what

some have you been building anything lately yeah I've been working on my

space sh all it's a

joke for I just yes but of course I've been working on my

rocket it has 59 dress and

7.2 aerodynamics up and down do you know this solici just in my

heart no I don't I I feel

them but now you're doing good though right

yeah that's really good yeah so I see like skid

stuff well I don't know my friend loed it to me cuz I was

going on a show but I love my pants do you skate at all yeah roller skate all the

time that's really good okay cut D the

cameraman well on a show but we're going to go to

Commercial and next we'll have the only known last surviving hippie in the world

bye rain you brought my [Music]

glasses you okay I think

can't W get away I think these might be them right here oh thank

you hey you don't do anything for my eyes

I almost forgot bye bye bye bye I'm not

that bad now but I wouldn't mind looking better so I'm going to go to my local up

John dealer This Is Me 1 hour

later hi there I feel great now now I have a full head of

hair and I can't even pretend I'm Millie

vanill is only known living hippie in the world today rainbow come on

Rainbow peace Make Love Not War got your

present well thank you thank you very

much I got lots of money where do you live New York

City in apartment no cardboard

box oh yeah figures what's your for my Transportation a little

boag and painted what kind of do you like any

sports no sports are a form of violence and I do not support

violence oh I agree definitely agree

so um where how how what made you choose to be

a hippie it was the end thing to do 30 years ago everybody was doing it but I

loved it so much I decided not to quit it's so much fun to live in a box

at night walking around you know a Madison

Square it's amazing how stupid some people are so has your carbo wax ever C on fire

from you know doing the drugs and stuff actually I've been very lucky it's only

C on fire 10 or 12 times and how long on in what period of time in what period of

time yeah like well let's see I started I I started Living in a cardboard box 29 years

ago probably about every couple years maybe two two and a half years wow I can

count that high and how old are you that's a good

question I lost track a few years ago and when was the last time you ever

got a haircut G must have been around

Woodstock no no no it was before it was after Woodstock yes that would probably

been late late 60 prob that's last time I had Mone

too do you have any any relation with the the star of this old

box actually yes I don't have any relation but we are good friends he he

did a he had on a what he call it he had it on extra closet for me very good

Craftsman I have if you ever need a Goods please give him a call I'm sorry

phone up he's in uh he's in Skid Row number two on uh Brooklyn in not in

Brooklyn I'm sorry in Manhattan by the World Trade Center that

area so okay what do you have glasses on or

anything all that actually yes I do they don't have any lenses in them but I kind of lost the lenses but for some reason I

seem to see better with them it helps me kind of push the hair aside know that's

really good I hope it's helpful oh well that's all the time we

had and make love not see you see you in 23 hours later come to the next Stanley

Cofe game we must protest the violence caus in this

horrible

take one I'm going down I'm going down I'm

GNA I'm going to going to jump I'm going to

jump

like the movie of The Lord of the [Music]

FL they said maybe I could eat these maybe

not first of all I got to find selur

got me give me my tape you know you fell over that

thing why it's stupid

stupid we're doing good at first don't you agre little C

dud then you do it come not then you do it I don't I

can't think of voice I don't know make

up I can't you can it's not the original girlfriend got be

stupid so easy anybody could do that who

anybody go exactly you almost had it you got so but you're you do the best I

don't care I want to do it why so what else do you want to do want to do huh

what else do you want to do I no no nothing

so can do you think I just F my dog while we're out here please I just want to send American

SP on videos with that tape no no I'm taping on another tape a blank one come

on man please why you want to film your dog it's not that funny they like kind of stuff they did who's that doggy in

the window and it got on I just wanted to get

on let's just do something else like what I why can't you do it I can't do

the voice so make up another voice it doesn't have to be the same voice just think it's it's

stupid what else do I to do want to do Norm I'm

here man there's a shelter not see would look good on camera you could have

gone you're the one I want to do camping trip you're the one that wanted to do a

movie the whole thing I know I don't want

I thought it was H CU you're

filming John and Patrick Studios you notice what this is this is the Ario

Hall John Hall's closet John don't film that and that's

one of the employees Sean come on you know this a scenery that was a W for gopher dude

johnas it you see it's a surf word that was John Che this out turn it off for a

second the other room Sushi cor shut up stop okay I think we'll go rewind

anything else to go down there no pictures

please hi oh my God this do look great do that

again is anyone in there wait wait stay there I'm no I'm

zooming up I'm zo up so comes and focus okay who now this stay there do do it now

just stay where you are they I in there you look like you're s [ __ ]

people where they have to wear hommet because they're not they they'll like fall on all the time what you look like

when you do you're like Patrick's favorite Azie Smith there says Bart man

what's up D yes this says eat my shorts and there's Aussie Smith look at that oh

and yes this is a surfbort so cool his cousin gave to

him and yes this is the the seat that John Hall and his

guest sits at there's a

taker there's some posters of people or you mean John Hol Show's

closet what are you doing rotating no stop eras

it excuse me sun boy I play my second

[Music]

phone [Music]

[Music]

much [Music]

[Music] thank you thank you very

much going go hot dog

now me and my grandson to play some people

grandson Ted Teddy is yeah

[Music]

[Music] okay what's wrong don't what's wrong

[Music] you

okay what's wrong I got respiratory

problem where's basketball

dad where's the basketball don't know son I don't know son cut it

Jonathan Le show all right we got a crazy show we

got Sushi Kuan we also got a pat up with a new attitude towards skateboard and a

top five and everything oh crazy we're going to go to

break hi he you want a fruit punch sure ready all right we're

back we got yeah our top five tonight is top

five ways to skip school okay number five is tell them

you're sick you stupid you screwed up again you so you

stupid oh God okay number four is fake cough and ask for an

asman number three ask if you can stay home cuz it's Monday number two stick

your thermometer in hot water and the number one way to skip

school far on your parents

yeah okay and we'll do some viewers mail

okay de job why do you always kill on your good friend jum sincerely Mary bigs

Wyoming yeah what you always kill all me cuz you're stupid you always mess up all the

time thought second letter is Dear John why are your feet so

big sincerely in crying M want to know well my feet are so big because I related to Sasquatch no not Chewbacca

Sasquatch get that straight don't write that in the newspaper now next one stear John on

your show Jo always just sits there and does nothing but talk but talk to to you

how much does he get paid and why is he there on your show well he gets paid

2,000 270,000 a year I don't know why he's on the show why are you on the

[Music] show for company well you're fine get

off the S oh man right Turtle actually

talk great they wanted more pictures

jeez it's a rough wife being a turtle things you got to do is walk around take

pictures print autographs with through my paw oh

man it's not that great of a life being a

turtle so tired why do they want me I don't understand

why can't I just go back to the pond and live a normal Turtle life but I got to be

famous famous

heroic now for a commercial

break this is Joe from Jonathan Letterman show yes he too can even play

the tone Bank 100 yes you can learn the matter of

seconds to play that's right Joe you're

playing since he just got party need some

money all right stop I'm going to play stupid Strangers

theme [Music]

stupid strangers there so stupid there're so

stupid stupid Str

to they're so stupid they're so stupid stupid

strange they so [Music]

stupid improved life call you can never lose

it this is sure a cool

book to go in the president of Life calls house Patrick

Tully hello hello Mr Tully

um I would like to do an interview with you would that be okay sure go go ahead

how do you like the new improved life call I love it I love it can you show us

what it is you can never lose it huh help no

help you okay what WR

no you I don't this CPR I can't get a hold of the paramedics it's not working

oh no oh no I don't know have the CPR are you okay are you okay oh

no he's dead uh oh I'm getting out of here

man I didn't do anything well that's it for this

interview with Mr Tully thank you and please get new life call it's the

easiest one to use the new and improved button thank

you introducing Pat

Tut hey what's up

cool show man this is tough cool huh okay I think okay so this is your new

surfboard you this my new one it is you made it it's yours

okay what happened to your skateboard how come you're not in skateboard anymore oh I don't know kind of I mean I am sometimes skap with this thing you

know bring it down to the beach yeah well you know I like surfing

better now it's more my style you know where do you serve like uh everywhere man I Sur in

like Hawaii and went to California man this is cool yeah is this sturdy damn

don't do that man it go put a hole in it so then it's a cheap board huh no it's

fiberglass okay what what are the are these your stickers or what are these uh they colors See colorful huh colorful

what kind is that it's a a orange yellow and uh white

and black cool cool so this is your board yeah it's a pat motion yeah so it's not

Pat well it's sort of both you know it's like I mean I needed a new kind of name you

know cat was kind of I mean everybody knew it and you know you skate at all

anymore yeah I skate down to the beach with my surfboard and my you know yeah

see just ho your surfboard is skating yeah but where do you Ser do you surf in Australia or yeah surf there West man

they got some dope waves there mhm and my dope waves yeah cool so now got new

words too huh yeah do do yeah I heard that one in New York cool why you can't

surve in New York no I was there on a surfing like interview with the Japs

Japanese yeah cool cool oh oh hold on hold this for a

second this is me at the P they up okay this is me see I got show

let the folks see it they can't see it see this is me H see I'm surfing Isn't that cool this is that

California cool cool guys it was really good H actually

it's at Hawaii are you good now are you like the best yeah I consider myself the

best do you still go skating competitions or now you're just in Surf well I haven't seen any lately so

no suring competitions a lot yeah where do you normally come in

first yeah so how did you learn how to

[Laughter] serve I just picked it

up picked it up justf gra surfboard picked it up go to the beach

cool all right have you you haven't had any experience with anybody teaching you no nothing nope I watch TV a lot that's

cool I mean you see all these Surfers they're all cool and they get in the cheeks and whatnot I se even a lot of

magazines yeah do you have any of those magazines I've seen you a lot of them you're in a lot H somewhere I don't know

where they are though oh I got one cat look at to start check it out

this meat floating on top of the water from a from a crash that cool pretty h p

a lot of pictures too AR real good I'm floating yeah oh is that your friend

there yeah it's my butt ah what's up he's cool he's pretty cool yeah cool

there's somewhere in here with a quick dope picture I remember seeing it there it is

you see that look at that water and both of those see pet

pet wa wait pet motion I'm tion so we all good huh yeah get a

lot of money a lot of girls yeah everything yep it's cool cool so what do

you think you're going to go into next

H depends

maybe I don't know but I know this one thing I ever crash and I can't surf

again I'm going going to like into a reef or something I'm going to go on those life qu commercials man cool yeah

do you ever do mountain biking haven't done it yet it looks pretty cool though

cool want some TR put some wheel on

this some B Tires you know yeah all

right I got an idea I'm going to have a cat melt

surfing it's going to have bicycle wheels and then you go surfing on it cool cool going down

Hills cool I I got to design this all right all right I got to I got to go all right all right okay all right hope to

see you bye out there cool okay later

[Music] peacee well that's it for the joh that's it for the John L show

and that was Pat Tut yes and he'll be back soon with his new attitude maybe again with biking surfing what's it

called again uh Mount surfing you say uh it's called Mount surfing all

right that's cool yep all right and then we'll see him back again yep all right

okay that's it for us

bye

the new home alone game go to your local Pepsi bottle dealer and you can get this

free game with two proofs of purchase of Pepsi yes please send in a New Home

Alone game hello we're coming straight to you from Africa yes Mom we have African

thing for you okay ready a what is the first item okay this is item number kg

B2 N9 okay genuine rabbit yes very cute yes nice rabbit and then very good

rabbit you like rabbit okay you buy it you buy rabbit okay very good paper mâché very good for you okay you like oh

color so don't you think how much is it again oh sorry um it's

$79.99 h well don't you think that's kind of high for okay I like you people

I like you okay okay special day for you only okay only $5.99 cuz I like you people I like you oh okay I I'll take it

okay okay okay goodbye okay okay the next item is oh gen one b

um Abdul X made it just in Africa FR from the village you like it you buy it

okay like only one one of a kind only one left that's no other ones made like this gun no other ones none other just

this only one okay I gave it to you for

$2.99 uh $2.99 uh you sure that's the the price $299 oh jeez well don't you think it's

kind of high yes so I you okay $299 $3 $3 for

you $3 oh okay I guess I'll take it$ okay oh look we just have another

one com in by your D leg yes same all nice one only one one of kind there's no

other one made like it just oh yes you like it okay okay you like it or right you like it you like it bu very good put

whatever steio okay okay col yeah um I I just bought that and you

said that was the only one I mean what what is this is this like a fraud here why you buing my home why you do that V

come on here me

I comment comment you people are stupid know

com okay I'll take it I'll take it I'll take it yes okay I'll take it I'll take it I'll take it okay buy it you like you

buy you like you buy from Africa okay very good very good I don't care about comments okay and

actually special idea special feel

Tomatoes tastes very good best tasting tomatoes ever yes very good they are called bage Tomatoes afcon Tomatoes okay

You Like It by You Like It by bye you like it okay special deal

$799 no no no we going lower we're going lower $798 okay just for you cuz I like you

you're nice okay you like it okay you like it color uh yeah

um I just got those two days ago and they're rotten rotten yeah they're rotten can I

get a refund for that I refund they rotten I mean they're

rotten come out

[Music]

here I'll buy it I'll buy I'll buy it I'll buy I'll buy another one just shut up okay fine fine just shut up just shut

up okay fine our next item

is can you might pick you like it's cute C oh very cute J you Le you like it you

buy it you like okay oh we have a color yeah um I bought that yesterday

and um and it came in I'm very surprised it came in fast I mean but um anyway it

didn't come with any directions uh can I it I think it was missing some but can I

uh get the directions I mean can you send it to me please why why in the direction you just go like this it's

okay okay I give you a direction okay okay I want Direction $75.99 okay good like goodbye you want Direction what

$75.99 what are you crazy yes well then you don't get direction why what do you

mean okay fine fine I I can't stand I'm never buying here again

fine want you want the if you don't don't buy Direction don't have money

don't call okay I don't want to hear your stupid voice you know I mean if you call call if you want if you like it to

buy it you do not come for stupid things okay manom okay we have nice big okay

okay okay that's it for us now we have to go okay and thank you for joining us

in Africa okay yes thank you

yeah come on in um I my car broke down I was

wondering if I could use your phone sure come on in all right thank you it's right there on the bench okay

thank you sure

anytime um hello I'd like to make a Qui call to Donna from John so are you

calling over no uh what what country do you live in

United States what continent

um North America um see uh what city um City

there Town Nora what state uh Connecticut what county uh Fairfield

uh what's the number you're trying to reach please um 853 2765 license

number 37569 credit card

number isn't that kind of personal just say it okay 0689

321 uh what kind of credit cards do you have MasterCard Visa any American

Express uh what age are you are you uh 17 what

grade are you in college or are you in high school 11th grade 11th grade okay

um H see are you a male or female male

uh What uh what's your sexual preference um

girls are you sure yes you don't sound like you like

girls yeah right okay um what's the number you're trying to reach again 853

2765 um okay um please wait and I'll have to call

your party oh this

is what you no I would not like to accept the

charges uh she doesn't want to accept the charg is

um okay okay bye thank you for using at

SH now it's time for Mr spatula hello

ladies and gentlemen today we're going to be cooking eggs yes one of the hardest things to manage okay first we

need to heat up the skillet ready

okay put it on low spread some see butter okay margin's good spread it on

so just spread it on it's like that really easy yeah you see that okay

good it's got to heat up a little bit okay put that on got to heat up a

little bit okay

okay put that on nice and low

okay okay remember always Safety

First it needs to just heat up a little

bit okay now time for eggs Ready set

go pretty much yeah that's going make a

mes okay just wait a couple [Music] seconds while we're doing that we'll

wait for the get the map syrup and put it in the

micro

all done okay we'll wait for that okay I think okay not ready yet so just a tab

more to go you ready with the eggs yes let see I

hope you've been paying attention now

okay pay attention Okay I said I put the butter on First and oh by the way if you

would like the transcript of this um uh recipe please send $1 to John hemson

free r d Connecticut 06855 okay only $1 you know it's

cheap smell

nasty okay um we need a plate um I don't know

it's all done see

videotape wine watch how it

works

this is the new turbo

Winder very Compact and portable is put on the top of your TV

okay that's it and watch it how it comes right up when it's

done hold on see just take it out real easy that's it all you have to do close

it and it's ready for next time okay thanking the new AT&T phone let's see

how it

works God I love this AT&T phone there's no interference and no static it's the

best phone I've ever had Nintendo is great on it

too and we're back okay and we have this the eggs are all set okay okay there's

just one more step to doing this and now you ready just watch just put it in the egg to the eggshell that you use for the

eggs you watching okay you stuff it m it tastes really good I mean it's like the

best thing you could ever have healthy too especially the eggs lots of vitamins remember always watch your watch your

special and make SE on it oh that's delicious okay okay right okay and now

just put in a little pop thing and then you go in you can enjoy a nice healthy

dinner with your

family that's the end of the show thank you for being and that's it Mr spea

yes and keep on [Music]

cooking my birthday is June 24th this year I want to get one of

these let's go upstairs

okay you guys what do you want to do you got to make sure you don't St room Pat

you swear my God okay wait let's get GS of me look at

me yeah you like my hair d

a smoth buddy don't touch come here this is Tony's Pet Shop aquarium how I take

your order may I interest you in this beautiful Turtle it's called a

slider damn and don't this is one of my favorites because it looks

so eant and look at him D diving so

peacefully I mean you can't get a better buy than that and he only cost

$39.99 let me show you a glimpse of that guy again here we go see see see he even

eats for a hand see your hand welcome to the [ __ ] [Music]

connection today we got Alfredo [Music]

infini hi hi viewers out there my name

is Alfredo so today we're going to try to make a bad

connection all right so um how did your date start off oh you wouldn't

believe I'm sorry I'm not just a show business I went over to his house around

7 o' cuz he he telephone me and told me to come on and he was looking good oh

and I say my I say when I open the door my first impression was baby this boy is

on fire he had the tightest little outfit he looked like right

side tight little butt let me tell you honey and you looked like a

fat I think he collapsed yeah we're not used to so let me tell you okay so we

went to a bar that for B you know sorry

who's who's more M oh we're neutral find

out sit honey might break a

b so wait sh we have to tell that thing okay sobody went to bar oh beautiful

dinner candle light sh candl light bar yes oh no it's like a

restant with the bar yeah yes but and then we had oh God Lobster the most

sexual food in America for [ __ ] and then and then we went

dancing let's show them dance right now okay yeah I think I think we got some uh

music break our feet um let me see yeah we do have some music here I

think it's you guys song our song what oh our on Dance come

on don't get too into it now we're very intimate to each

other okay okay that's enough that's enough please so don't go girl then girl

we went back to his place I mean she did we rocked the little o

bo and then it was so fun and then then I went home

so did you have a good time yes oh I did did you did did

you I'm sorry I don't think this relationship

would work you know I found on lady she you know you're

pie I'm sorry I this hasn't been a love connection but um a fat connection but

we'll come back later on you marry me baby well next

time it's the

P oh show thank you thank you thank you all right today today we got um a

special guest coming by later on but first off we got a fedini from the bad

connection all right bring on fi here's fedini how you doing fedini hi oh no

it's Alfredo oh I'm sorry

Alfredo all right well whatever the hell you U anyway um so what happened to the

other guy the F you mean Alfredo yeah what happened you don't have to come

that Alfredo and broke up and why was

that because I'm not gay anymore so what are

you I don't know he doesn't know what he

is um okay

well did you sleep with a woman after you um went with fedini or

Fredo I'm not the okay well

uh um let me ask you a question you go some no sorry I'm I'm

not your type sorry no I'm I'm the other type

okay all right where you going time um let's see I think we'll go a commercial

break I'll be right back with uh fi at Bobs on sale we have a Sony Walkman on

sale oh very good has play Rewind forward and stop and it also has FM and

AM so come to Bobs now and fire was on sale hi we're back with the pat Hall

Show um um Alfredo I got a special surprise guest for you guess who's here

my Aunt Patty no guess who hey uh fedini

come out here for

second I'm so

sorry

I'm um biggest clut off

I I'm sorry shake your little tush cat walk so

um excuse me how do you feel about this do you think you'll get back together with

him um well why you should bite the microphone what do you think oh do you

think you still love him I love him dearly it's just him he's such a bad boy do you still love

him now speak up honey the microphone can't hear you I just feel so lonely at home

when he's not there he does hey that's a bad connection what about your woman um

she's not good for me now since I have a nice man well oh yeah we can get back together

yes okay okay I think why you say we'll go to a g tonight huh okay the Ling I

think that's it for today um no thanks but I'll see you tomorrow

on the the P show okay thanks

byee

hello oh I just called I just called to say I love

you no okay fine I use 9x telephones

because they're great quality and they work very good so you use them too okay

thank you

he doesn't know his you with Patrick's new room there

was TV oh crap where's this go put that oh in seon she going to kill me what do

you want me to do so we got to help look room okay look that is a turtle okay now

let's see there's poster there's Patrick PTY G there goes Jeffrey G okay let's go

into okay let's see I don't know if you can see this well folks but that is the

other Jour I we got to clean our crap up come on shoot I should let's go let's go come

on come on come on turn it off come on we're under cover

now we're oh that's what we got to do like

[Music]

my on you look over there you satisfy my view

your it makes my wild hey

hey eat glass creis how'd you like

that you guys are a bunch of whips you can't hit

anything hi

[Music]

Tada get [Music]

H knock that stuff off I

you hello out there in television [Music] land all right here's the deal if

Bachelorette number one isn't out here