Gratitude "Podcast" Interview: Dennis Brink

Well, hi, everybody. It's David George Brooke, that gratitude guy with another special guest on my gratitude podcast interview regarding the pandemic

And today I was thinking about it as each guest comes on board. I've known Dennis, gosh, I don't know, 10 or 15 years or something like this

We met and our paths crossed on a number of occasions, but a very sharp young man. Anybody who's younger than me is a young man, of course, as we know

So Dennis, Brick, welcome to the podcast. We should be starting this podcast out in complete honesty here younger than you

For what reason is what I want to know. Where have the years gone

So I mentioned occasionally on the podcast about doing, the reason I'm doing this is to really get some input or some ideas and some thoughts or tips or whatever you want to call it to maybe people that aren't as resourceful as other people

And so let me start off with this question. what has been your best coping mechanism to deal with this pandemic these last five or six weeks

Well, you know, I've been thinking about that a bit here as I was preparing to get together with you here

And really, when I think about it, I feel so fortunate that I don't have to go to work, you know

So I've been thinking a lot about other people. And there's been plenty of times in my life when I was living week to week, paycheck to paycheck, month to month

Yeah. And the amount of stress that can get on when there's no income, come

or you wonder what's going to happen can be pretty intense. But I've had a lot of intense things over the course of my life

that have caused me to develop a posture and attitude toward getting through those things

And a lot of it is in line with what you are so great about teaching about

being consistent with his gratitude. And so that's a huge part of it

You know, as I've looked back over whether it was Vietnam or what I went through there

or some of the struggles I've gone through with the loss of a loved one and, you know, in death and

those types of things, those kind of things can really have a toll on you, you know, mentally and

so forth. And I found that there's a, there was an old saying that give thanks and everything

And I realized at the time that I was thinking about that, that didn't say to give thanks for

the bad that happened. Right. You know, I'm not thankful that somebody died. I'm not thankful that

somebody got their legs blown off in Vietnam or killed. Not thankful for it, but I'm thankful in it

Yes. And I think that posture of gratitude has allowed me to begin to glean the good that may exist

in the hard thing that I'm going through. You know, when I came back from Vietnam, I wanted to run from everything

I wanted to block it out. I wanted to deny it. I drank heavily

A lot of things to try to cope. it wasn't until I turned around to face it and to let go of the judgment I had about it and just

begin to look for what good I could find it and that it really had a profound impact on me

So I tried to apply that same thing to this. What is it that, what good, what is the gift that lies wrapped up in this

Right. You know, would I take the time to finally start writing my book that I've been putting off forever

Would I practice guitar more? when I finish up some instruments that I'm working on

I build ukuleles and guitars. When I finish up some of those, there's always opportunity that exists in the struggle that we're going through

And so I've just been applying myself to that, to let that be the focus

as opposed to the panic sometimes, I think that can probably hit a lot of people

is when's it going to end? It's got to be over it. You know, things that you can't control

Right. you know and and our tendency as humans is to come from a place of control trying to control it true

when we feel powerless to control it then we've got to start finding what what is the other good

how can this help me you know in vietnam it was how can i become a better person for what i've

been through how can i become a more loving person a more patient person and i think there's lots here

i been doing a lot of connecting with people in other ways zoom like this we been doing some of that telephone i been checking in on people that I wouldn normally check in on And so there been some really neat connections through that That neat

Oh, sorry, Dennis. You say give thanks and everything. And I really like that because it reminds me of going through this terrible time

Anybody, all you have to do is watch the news, which I think maybe you can watch too much of it since this started

But there's always silver linings. And I think this, one of the things I thought about the other day was this technology

I feel like I'm sitting across to me with a Starbucks with a lot of It feels like we're three or four feet away and we're on a Zoom call

So there's a lot of good that has come out of this. The Silver Line is through a lot of the dark clouds

And as that gratitude guy and promoting gratitude and being grateful all the time

what have you noticed? Are you grateful for the same things? Did it change once you went through the pandemic for what you were grateful for

or five or six or seven weeks ago versus now? Well, I don't know

Like I said, you know, I had to start applying these principles years ago. and so I felt like I was maybe more prepared to begin doing that just as a result of what I was going through here

There's one thing that I think could be the greatest gift that we get out of this pandemic

Because I've been very concerned, you know, over the past years that I've watched, especially on social media

And an example would be of people's different political views or whatever their views that were different

And what I noticed is there was so much hatred might be too hard a word, but they're

There was so much like if I disagree with you, then it gives me the right to say you're stupid, you're dumb

You know, I'm right, you're wrong. And I said to a neighbor yesterday

I wonder how long we have to be quarantined because in this quarantine, we realize we're all in this together

Right, right. Nobody is untouched, and it's worldwide. And as humans, we are supposed to be connected

And yes, we're going to have lots of differences. But those differences should never be the thing that divide us

and separate us and begin to work. wedges against each other to where we're attacking each other and saying things about each other

that it's like, wow, to me, as the world has done more of that, it seems like that'll be the

thing from within that destroys us, not something external, but that posture and that attitude

And so I said to the neighbor, I wonder how long we have to be in quarantine before we really

get to understand that once again, that we're all joined together in this

and we're not the other person isn't the enemy. Yeah. Even if he doesn't agree with whatever I think is right

And I should always be kind. And so I wonder, you know, are we picking up more on that

Because I noticed that it does seem to be making more connections when I'm out walking, you know

because we have this shared common experience of hardship. Hopefully it's bringing us close together as a human race

That's a good point. And I think, again, one of those silver linings that through, the many things that people that being part of something bigger than you or me and that type of

thing is can be very encouraging with the some of the vitriol and some of the negative stuff that's

come out and you're absolutely right and i think about that and i think about dennis brink and i think

about somebody who's done a lot of stuff and way back to vietnam but all the things you've done too

from the businesses that you've been in and building repairing musical instruments etc etc

Any thoughts, Dennis, on what somebody might do, why they're stuck in their house

I mean, again, you've always had a lot of stuff going on, a lot of balls to juggle

But any other thoughts are things that they could do during this time of being homebound

Well, I think if we all just started looking at the things, maybe we've been putting off because we didn't have time would be possibly one thing that we could begin to apply or so to

And I think that's a very magical thing to do. If we've been putting something off because tomorrow's always going to be a better day and we start doing it today, it has a very releasing effect inside of it

And who knows what just that alone could begin to do for people

The other thing I think is, I've been trying to think, who can I encourage in this time

Because if I'm, you know, feeling the effects of this, what about someone else

If I could focus on another human being and how can I brighten their day

How can I bring some positive Is there some way I might be able to help financially Is there you know looking for ways to serve our fellow man That a great I think there always magic in that There always magic

I had one of the podcasts recently and the quote was similar to that and he says

my goal is to be the highlight of somebody else's day. Yeah

What a neat goal. And again, help those that are less fortunate. I did a Monday morning

video a couple days ago about how the first week or so I lost a

a bunch of speaking engagements and things because of the pandemic and so forth

But it took me about three or four days and I kind of gathered myself and I thought, you understand how fortunate you are for all the things that you have

And, you know, who knows that the speaking things will come back or not. Just being healthy and just seeing the suffering and the things like that

It goes back to what is gratitude all about, focusing what you have versus what you don't have

So but so one, a couple more questions, Dennis, any thoughts in your world of what you're going to do to kind of once this is over

we don't know when it's going to be over. We know it will end, but we don't know how it'll end and in phases and so forth

But any other thoughts you've had around, I'm going to hit the ground running when this is over

that it may be changed since before it happened? Again, I don't, you know, before the pandemic, to me, is big

but it seems small compared to some of the other trials I've been through over the past few years with, you know

So, you know, I have a daughter that's, you know, I have a daughter that's. struggles with mentally, you know, she's had some birth defects since life. And she said

it's really interesting. Now people are learning what it's been like for me. I've been in isolation

all my life. Wow. And I thought, wow, that just gripped me quite because how many people have

been living in isolation already. Wow. And now maybe the rest of the world is getting, you know

a feel for what that would be like. Yeah. Because there's a lot of ways for people to be in isolation

So I think I feel more motivated to, you know, let my life message be more about that

How do we stay more connected as humans? You know, how do we do that

What I said earlier, how do we let our differences down? I'm writing about that more as well now, and I was always, writing was always something I was going to do

And one day I'm going to write a book and someday I'm going to, just not today, but someday

Right. And so I actually started on putting some of those thoughts down on it. Fantastic

So that's one thing and I want to continue that. And then I want to continue the connection with others

You know, I've always been kind of a connector to begin with

but this has made me even more aware of the need that exists. Yeah, because people look, I think people, even though our world was going

people, a lot of times we're still living in isolation with whatever their struggle was

with whatever they were dealing with. That is a great point. It's back to that, you know, walk a mile on my shoes

And so just that isolation piece, that's, I can't say somebody brought that up in the past

That's a great reminder. And so, so Dennis, last question. I think back to way back, Vietnam was in the 60s and so forth

And you go back to some of the trials and tribulations there for you and different things

And then you and I met and you filled me in some of your history and I did of yours, my history with you

If you had sort of what I would call a quote or a sane or a philosophy

that you kind of, well, this is what I, I mean, some people said this too shall pass

but maybe that you think gets you through a time like this or a philosophy or something that is

some people have a quote sometimes that kind of is what's kept you going through all the trials

and tribulations that you've been through. Yeah, and I think it was, we've been talking about it a lot already

It's actually an old, old scripture that says when you go through something really tough, consider it a gift

It doesn't say it is a gift. It just says it considered a gift because it through that process

process, it'll show what's still lacking in you or in me. And when we see that, when our eyes are

open to see what might still be lacking, it gives the opportunity for that to change. And so often

we're just in a war with whatever is going on. We're trying to get it to quit. We're trying to make it

go away We think that the goal We gravitate toward pleasure We run from adversity and hardship and difficulty Rather than embracing it turning to face the hardship

Face it without judgment. Let it just be. And then see what can be learned from that

I was going to a time when I was really feeling pain, a lot of internal pain over some stuff that was going on with a family member

and it was painful because you couldn't help. You couldn't do anything to change it

And I remember thinking to myself, I wonder if I can live with this pain to the rest of my life

because I know how this pain is ever going to go away. Wow

It feels like it's forever going to be with me, but I wanted to try to run from it. I wanted to try to deny it

In the old days, I would have reached for something like alcohol or drugs that would have numbed it out

But I've laid that down, so that wasn't an option. and so I thought I wonder, you know, will I be able to make it

Will it be my undoing in the end? And I finally came to a place where I thought, well, I wonder if I just turned and faced my pain

and was just present with my pain, didn't try to judge it, didn't try to make it go away

If I would just do that, embrace it and just let it be okay, let it be there for what it is

And there was something so powerful in that. Wow. And I turned to embrace it

And I think a lot of times that's what we're doing. We're fighting where we're at. If we have power to change it, then we should

Yeah. But when we don't, it's that acceptance that allows us then to begin to glean the message

that might be wrapped up in it. Right. To learn from it, to show us how it may change us for the better

Yeah. And so that has just been so powerful to me. And like I say, you know, I have a long, long laundry list of all the times that I've had

to, you know, apply that. in my life, but given me the opportunity to practice it

And it always shows up something in me, something that I can learn

Yeah. And I think that's how our world will change, is if we all look to ourselves

if we all look at ourselves first, it's so easy for us to look at the other guy and say, well, I wish he would change

Right. I look at my wife and say, I wish she would change. Right. You know, because I'm bugged by how they're being or whatever, it's bothered me

But when I let that become the first thing that it, does has caused me to look at myself in the mirror and to see how this difficulty can then

change me for the better. So that's kind of been a life lesson that has guided me through the

hard times that we're in. And it's doing the same in this time that we're in right now

Yeah. I like that. I think a lot of what you're describing is wisdom. And it seems like the only

way we get wisdom is just days on the planet. You know, and I think about people who have left too soon

and I think about what I've learned at my age and what you've learned at your age. And again, you've been through a lot of things too

But that's very wise words. That aspect about the isolation piece is really, really fantastic

I'm so glad you included that because, again, just walking in somebody else's shoes

you just don't know until somebody says, now you see what I'm talking about. And it helps you guys, which is really important

And I think what comes before that, David, is humility. I think sometimes the hard to bring us to a place of humility

if we let it. Yeah. And if it brings us to a place of humility, then we're really open to be alerted

Yeah, true. When we're coming from another place of just judgment, we're not in a place of humility

We're in a place of saying, I'm better than David, see? Yeah. David is worse than me

And that somehow makes me feel better about myself because I think you're worse or whatever

That's true. It's really, oh my gosh, it says so much about us, you know

yeah. When we're thinking that way and we can't see it. Yeah, that's true

You know, that self-reflection back to look at myself in the middle of, But what can change here

How can this make me a better person? Right, right. Excellent. It opens up all kinds of possibilities

All kinds of possibilities. Well, listen, thank you so much. Great, great points as I figured I would get from Dr. Brink

take to Ashman, call me in the morning. So anyway, but listen, thank you so much for being on the podcast

Oh, thanks for inviting me, Dave. It was great being with you. Great seeing your smiling face again

Keep up the good work you're doing. Thank you so much. See you, Dennis. All right

You bet. Bye. The