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TV Exclusive: A Musical Intervention in New Episode of Rachel Unraveled!
Nov 3, 2022
It's time for another episode of BroadwayWorld's newest web series, Rachel Unraveled. In this episode, Marie Claire stages an intervention after Rachel's addiction to a food delivery app spirals out of control. Meanwhile, Spatterman must brave Times Square on a journey to obtain his Equity card in order to land a new agent. Starring Rachel Ravel, Austin Spero, Olivia Caridi. Special guest stars Chad Kimball and Lindsay Nicole Chambers. Also starring Tina Benko and Chessa Metz. Directed by Rachel Ravel and Austin Spero. Written by Billy Recce, Austin Spero, and Rachel Ravel. Original music and lyrics by Billy Recce.
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0:00
I'm going to ask you one more time
0:05
Where were you during 9 p.m. and 1 a.m. I already told you
0:09
I was at Raphaelie's place. We watched a movie. We fooled around a little bit
0:14
We went to bed. You're lying. Stop lying. You were at the cottage when Meredith was murdered
0:20
No, I wasn't. Please. I just want to go home. Liar! Why did you murder Meredith
0:25
Your boyfriend already choned on you. I don't know why he would do that. I was with him the whole night
0:29
You're not going anywhere until... Okay, stop, stop, stop. That was terrible. What's wrong
0:34
I actually thought that was your best take. MC, I hate to throw a monkey wrench in things
0:39
but like my third favorite British game show, it's not me, it's you
0:43
When you signed on to be my reader for my self-tape for the untitled Amanda Knox true crime biomusical
0:48
you were agreeing to the highest of professional standards. You are not just a reader
0:52
You are a lifeline. You are a rock. You is kind. You is smart
0:57
You is important. And I can't help it if you're the only one. who came to my open call
1:01
Rachel, you posted a notice on backstage looking for a reader saying you were Annette Funnicello
1:06
I've been to Hawaii. Listen, I have to cook a frittata before tonight's liberals who look like
1:13
Republicans' progressive dinner party. Do you want to try another take? No, I'll just have O'Chune record it for me later
1:21
That reminds me, though. I am starving. Do you want anything? Besides reclaiming my dignity? No
1:30
Why? I've been using this new app called Eatable, and every time you order a meal, you get points
1:36
and then you exchange those points for prizes. I've never felt more proud to be an American
1:41
What kind of prizes? Well, I'm only five points away from a free bottle
1:45
of specially for kids' pediatric nutrition shake. I've been doing this for two weeks now
1:50
and I am in the zone. Rachel, it sounds to me like you're addicted
1:56
Addicted. Who's addicted? I've only ordered Typhoon. And four times a day, I'm perfectly fine
2:02
Rachel, just please be careful. Addiction is a disease. Sometimes I still shudder when I think back
2:08
on my crippling history with substance abuse. Hi, yes. I am going to get half a pound of the lamb kebabs
2:14
and a large number seven. Thank you. Okay, have a great day
2:18
Love you, kisses. Bye. Woo! I am Robinous. Let me just say how much of an honor it is to be here today
2:36
Sir Ian McKellen is one of my biggest heroes. Sir Ian McKellen is not one of my clients
2:43
I know, I'm just saying he's one of my biggest heroes. Anywho, thank you so much for having me today, Mrs. Riley
2:49
Please. Mrs. Riley is what you call my estranged aunt who once contracted rabies on a trip to Yellowstone
2:55
You call me, Maxine. Sorry, it's the whole high school thing. I really just can get used to not call me
2:59
calling my elders, Mr. and Mrs. or mom by accident. Regardless, Mr. Spatiman, here's the deal
3:05
I watched your real, and I must admit, even though 75% of it appear to be you weeping openly
3:12
to various episodes of This Is Us. I was intrigued, sir. Intrigued and impressed
3:18
Here's the deal, old pal, so... Austin. Right. I'm interested in representing you as a client
3:23
I think you have the three magic ingredients. Potential. I think you have potential to inspire..
3:28
to inspire many a Disney Channel wannabe star, perhaps some eager newsboys wearing checkered caps on a jaunty angle
3:37
and perhaps even a fair number of middle-aged, Talbot-like character actors. That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me, Maxine
3:46
Now, where do I sign? Not so fast, pony boy. There is one caveat
3:55
In all my 85 years as a talent, agent, I have never once signed a single thespian who didn't have an equity card
4:05
But I don't have an equity card? I am an ornate minister, though
4:09
Who isn't, kids? Listen up. If you want to sign with me, you've got to prove yourself
4:16
And you've got to be legit. But the only way to get an equity card is by working 50 hours at a registered theater
4:22
My boy, there is another way. Follow this map. A single equity card, annual potential representation, are marked by an axe
4:58
Wait. All I need to do to get an equity card is just..
5:02
Find one. Man, why has no one told me this before? Because it's a perilous journey, my boy, the likes of which you have never seen
5:13
Now, if you want this, you've got to prove your medal. You've got to prove to me your desire
5:18
Most normal work-a-day Joe's would rather do three regional productions of Fiddler
5:22
if we're embarking on a quest they're dangerous. And those shmactors, Mr. Sparlyman, are not my clients
5:28
Now I must warn you You may never come back from us
5:39
Please. I've been to Black Tap. I think I know my way around this city
5:45
Don't go too far. I'll be right back, Mom. Maxine! You can call me, Mom
5:55
Many have. have. Oh, God, it was you
6:13
I was hoping when I knocked on this door again that maybe I was hallucinating
6:17
and I was actually knocking on a door on Central Park West or someplace where they actually tip, but..
6:21
But nope, you're at a white girl's apartment in Harlem. Now, where's the grub
6:25
Here's your Chinese. And here's your prize. A nutrition shake for children
6:35
Thanks, Vince. Always a pleasure. Later. Rachel, listen. I usually try not to get involved in the personal lives of my clients, but this is your third order today
6:48
Breakfast, lunch, and dinner. It's 10 a.m. Yeah, but it's like midnight right now in Australia, and by that clock I haven't eaten at all today, Vince
6:57
Rachel, when I first started delivering to you, you didn't know my name
7:02
And I'm awful at names, so that's really a win. When I first started, your apartment smelled like apples
7:08
and now it smells like open tins of takeout. That's my new air freshener
7:17
Oh. Rachel, I'm not just saying this because our headquarters are in Brooklyn
7:24
and I'm the only delivery boy who has the patients to come over here
7:27
I'm saying this because for some odd reason, I care about you
7:32
and I really think you need help. But I'm so close to getting enough points for a free tube of Honecker wrapping paper
7:39
I will give you a free tube, Rachel. It's not the same
7:45
I'm not addicted, Vince. I can quit whenever I want. And then, there's a little girl who's drunk on a victim
7:52
I mean, I haven't even experienced a musical montage where I'm essentially ordered takeout yet
7:57
Rachel, you're addicted
8:27
All right, Austin, you're gonna live forever. You're gonna learn how to fly. Hi
8:38
All you need to do is just to figure out this map. Can't be too
8:43
My, how uneasy I feel. Rachel! Rachel
8:57
I have a nice homemade meatloaf for you. Okay, well, I didn't make it, but the ladies at the food pantry weren't even looking
9:10
Rachel? Rachel? Rachel, I have a beautifully nutritious meal, which I plan on being the first of many
9:22
Oh, ha, I'msy. What is going on in here? Are you trying to hobble this man
9:27
Oh my god, no! I was just showing him my Kathy Bates impression
9:31
until I was so rudely interrupted. This is true. But I am holding him hostage
9:36
until he agrees to start delivering to me again. This is also true
9:40
Rachel, holding people hostage is wrong. Oh, please. The only thing wrong is that smell
9:45
What is that? Meatloaf. Oh, my God. Where are my mirrors? O'Toole, MC made you dinner
9:55
Rachel, someone in here needs a serious talk. to. The slotted spoon can catch the potato
10:16
The greater the good, the hard of the blow. Wait, were we supposed to have these prepared
10:23
You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Good day, little boy
10:35
Good day, Mrs. Chicago girl. Where are you off to, so? Hurriedly
10:40
To the actor's equity headquarters. And what might be there? An equity card
10:45
It's almost pilot season, and mother's special sign me if I'm able to retrieve one. Sorry, Maxine
10:51
And where might this equity headquarters be located? According to the map she gave me, it's just another quarter of a leap further into Midtown
11:00
Just past the TGI Fridays. And how does one receive this equity card The mother says all I need to do is just follow this path and then uh we give it to me
11:12
Sorry, uh, vaccine. Why do I keep doing that? Intriguing. You know, an equity card sure can change someone's life
11:21
Yeah, I know. That's why I'm doing this. Sure can promote a girl from pamphlet holder to swing, perhaps
11:32
Yeah, perhaps. Listen, how about I just take one of these and I hear Josh Peck is the new Billy Flynn and would want to miss that, so..
11:47
Good day, Mrs. Chicago girl. Good day. Little boy. Okay
12:17
All right. This way. A little more. Just a little bit more
12:25
Are you ready for your life to change? You bet. I can't believe Eatable chose me to be their new spokesperson
12:31
and just a few hours after they canceled my membership. This has been a whirlwind of a day
12:35
And as Darren Chris once told me, it gets better. Okay, sit down
12:41
Ooh, a little bit too. All right. Now, open your eyes. Oh, wow
12:50
Who'd have thought that all the most important extras in my life are also execs at eatable
12:54
Oh, we're not executives, honey. No, this is an intervention. I've always wanted to be a presenter of Broadway con
13:01
No, no, not a convention, Rachel, an intervention. Unfortunately, that's true, honey
13:09
My name is Heather, and I am a life coach. Your friend over here called us all and brought us up here
13:15
and asked me to lead the charge. You know, I had an opening after my 4.30 got mad cow disease
13:22
Did you know that was still a thing? So, here I am
13:27
To rid you of that devil within this app. Marie Claire, I told you I wasn't addicted
13:32
Rachel, we all really care about... Shut up, Ava Madison. I thought you got ridden off last week
13:39
It's all right, sugar. I, too, have struggled with addiction in my past
13:44
You know, back in my day, I was a concubine to a very satanic little drink
13:50
Hell, if I even saw it, it would trigger me. But it worked, and I prayed
13:57
And most importantly, I sang. Hit it, Tasty Cake. It's a long road to recovery, as everybody knows
14:18
And that goes for bros in tennis shorts to friendly eskimos. Yes, we've all got our demons who destroy us ounce by ounce
14:28
So there's 12 steps to redemption, but just one step that counts
14:35
Knock it off, Rachel, cut the crap. Your face is deep in Satan's laugh, but no, it's all the red man's trap
14:44
So stand and walk away. When hell's reserved a spot for you, say Satan, baby, I'm a true
14:53
And hell is not a game that my folks play. At least that's what my neighbor Mort would say
15:04
Because when you've got step number one, you're gonna be okay. Yeah. Yeah
15:14
Yeah. Quick
15:25
What floor is Actors' Equity? Oh, God. I'm actually just filling in for a friend who's out with mad cow disease
15:32
Did you know, that's still a thing? Let me check. Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on
15:40
Oh, wait, no, this is Binder L through Z. One second. Hooked on a book on a TV show like Guiding Light or Daddy-o
15:52
Are those still on? How should I know? Hell, I don't watch TV
15:58
Is this a good inequity? No, this is Mommy and Me kickboxing? Ah! Ah
16:08
Get hooked on kindness or on home, or crack cocaine or even dope
16:17
or choking yourself with a rope. Red leather, leather, red leather, get old, red leather
16:24
Is this actor's equity? It could be. But eatables more treatable so look in the mirror and set that girl free Okay Is this a Stagatra Indeed No not you guys
16:47
See that it go! The sun is out, so say hello, and taste it's in candace and glow
16:55
Girl, you could use a tent. Yeah. With them with friends to hold your hand
17:00
you'll make it to the promised land. And now I'll rip, and just because I'll..
17:33
When you've got step number one, you're gonna be okay. Yeah, Rachel
17:54
Thank you so much. You are all so right. Food delivery apps are the devil
18:01
And I may not know any of your names. but you have all saved my life, and much more importantly, my waistline
18:08
Anytime, Pudin'pop. Now who's paying? I'm here in my equity cards. Spatterman
18:15
Raiter? You made it! Well, here you go, Ziggy! Wait, this is actually Actors' Equity? Why is it just an empty room with chairs
18:31
Oh, Actors' Equity is just a minute. Yeah, that there is just an index card with some Sharpie on it
18:38
Aren't you a motivational speaker? Motivational speaking pays the bills, but fulfilling young performers dreams of becoming actors, equity members is my passion
18:49
You know, I'm just a freelancer now, but I hope to make equity card distribution a full-time job in the very near future
18:57
That's a job? Honey, have you ever seen The Bachelor? Aspiring dolphin trainers a job
19:03
I'm here, my everything! Looking for this. I guess you could say I could do it alone. Hachah
19:12
Do you get it? It's a Chicago reference. You win this round, little boy
19:23
But I'll be back. On another note, everyone comes to Chicago featuring Pete Dittie's Billy Flynn
19:31
Uh, I thought it was Josh P. I thought it was Josh Pack. These stunt cats change every hour
19:37
So long. What are you? What are you? Well, isn't this great
19:50
Spatterman got his equity card. Mm-hmm. And Rachel is cured of her crippling addiction
19:56
Mm-hmm. I just don't you guys love when everything works out? I'm happy for you. Spatterman
20:03
Oh, thank you so much. But I'm happier for myself! I have rid myself of the eatable app and the only thing I have to show for it is this bottle, especially for KidsPedia Show Nutrition Shake
20:12
Is that? Is it what? Give me that shake! Oh, is that the drink
20:17
I've missed you, sweet master. We should go. Get out! Yeah, we should go
20:25
Back it up, back it up, back it up, back it up, back it up, back it up, back it up, back it up, go. Excerism! Oh
20:32
Hello. Hello. I'm here to audition for the ad. My name's Rachel Ravelle
20:54
Actress, singer, and newly sober, dog whisperer. Amazing. If you want to just take a look at the side, that'd be amazing
21:01
That'd be amazing. Of course. Thank you so much for your support during this trying time
21:06
It's just so great to be back up. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No
21:18
No, no. No, no. No, no. No, no. Run. No! No
21:41
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Oh. Oh
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