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have you ever wondered why some
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relationships leave you drained while
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others make you feel more alive than
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ever why certain people bring out your
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best while others trigger old wounds you
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thought you'd already healed and why no
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matter how much you care closeness
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sometimes feels complicated if you felt
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this Carl Young would tell you "You're
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not broken you're human and the path to
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deeper healthier relationships begins
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with understanding yourself far beneath
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the surface." Jung didn't teach
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relationship hacks he wasn't about quick
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tips or games he believed that
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relationships are mirrors powerful
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reflections of our deepest inner life he
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once wrote "Everything that irritates us
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about others can lead us to an
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ourselves." But here's the twist the
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things that attract us about others also
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reveal hidden truths about us so if you
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want to build a deeper relationship with
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a partner friend or even family you have
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to first ask what am I projecting what
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am I seeking what am I afraid to face in
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myself and in them because the greatest
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barrier to healthy love is the
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unconscious baggage we carry into
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connection yung's work gives us five
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essential insights for creating deeper
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healthier relationships let's explore
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them one by one insight number one the
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shadow shapes how we relate jung
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believed we all have a shadow the parts
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of ourselves we reject deny or suppress
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and often we unconsciously project these
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traits onto others ever felt
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irrationally annoyed with a partner only
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to realize they were reflecting
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something unresolved in you or found
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yourself idealizing someone placing them
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on a pedestal only to later feel
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disappointed when they couldn't match
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your fantasy that's the shadow at work
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healthy relationships require us to meet
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our shadow with honesty so we can see
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the other person clearly not through the
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filter of our past wounds insight number
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two attraction is archetypal young also
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taught that what draws us to someone is
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often rooted in unconscious archetypes
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thema and animus the inner feminine and
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masculine energies within each of us
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sometimes we're not falling for a person
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we're falling for the archetype they
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represent and until we recognize this we
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may repeat the same patterns choosing
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partners who fit a familiar mold but not
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necessarily what we truly need building
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healthier relationships means bringing
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these patterns to light and choosing
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consciously not compulsively insight
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number three growth requires tension not
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comfort many believe a good relationship
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should feel easy jung would disagree he
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believed real growth happens through
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creative tension when two individuals
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challenge and stretch each other while
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still honoring their individuality he
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wrote "The meeting of two personalities
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is like the contact of two chemical
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substances if there is any reaction both
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transformed." So if your relationship
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sometimes feels uncomfortable don't
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panic that discomfort might be the very
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space where growth and depth are trying
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to emerge the key is to approach tension
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with curiosity not fear insight number
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four intimacy requires inner wholeness
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young taught that the greatest
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relationships are not between two
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incomplete halves seeking to become
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whole they're between two individuals
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who have embraced their own wholeness
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and choose to share it if you depend on
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someone else to complete you you'll
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unconsciously demand they fix what's
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unresolved in you but if you approach
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love from a place of inner alignment you
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can give without clinging receive
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without fearing loss that's the
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foundation of deeper healthier love
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insight number five real love is a
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journey of individuation individuation
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is Jung's term for the lifelong process
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of becoming your most authentic self he
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believed relationships thrive when both
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people are committed to their own
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individuation and support each other's
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journey this means honoring differences
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celebrating each other's growth and not
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fusing into one blurred identity it
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means loving in a way that makes both
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people more themselves not less so what
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does this look like in real life here
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are a few simple but profound shifts you
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can make today one practice self-
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inquiry before reacting when you feel
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triggered ask "What is this showing me
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about myself?" Two notice your
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projections are you seeing the person or
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a role you've assigned them three honor
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solitude healthy relationships thrive
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when both partners nurture their own
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inner world four embrace honest
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conversations tension is not the enemy
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avoidance is five support each other's
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growth celebrate your partner's
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individuation even when it challenges
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your comfort zone remember deeper
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healthier love is not about perfection
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it's about presence not about agreement
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on everything but about the courage to
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meet everything with compassion and
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curiosity jung wrote "Your visions will
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become clear only when you can look into
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your own heart who looks outside dreams
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awakes if you want deeper connection
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start by awakening to yourself then
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bring that awakened presence into every
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relationship you touch and here's the
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beautiful paradox when you stop trying
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to control love when you stop trying to
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get it right and start showing up as
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your most whole present
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self that's when love deepens naturally
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that's when relationships become not a
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place to hide but a space to heal and
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grow so today I invite you to reflect
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what part of me is ready to be more
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conscious in love what shadow am I
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willing to face how can I support the
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growth of those I love while honoring my
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own because deeper healthier
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relationships begin with deeper
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healthier awareness and the journey
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starts with you if this resonated with
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you comment below i'm ready for
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conscious love and remember to subscribe
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for more wisdom from the minds of Young
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from Rilka and beyond because the more
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we grow in love the more we grow in life
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until next time stay awake stay kind and
