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have you ever chased someone who kept
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pulling away you gave them attention
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kindness patience but the more you
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reached for them the more distant they
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became and no matter what you did
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nothing seemed to bring them closer if
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this sounds familiar Carl Young would
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say "There's a reason for this pattern
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and it's not about them it's about what
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their behavior awakens in you." See Jung
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taught that relationships aren't just
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about two people they're about the
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hidden forces each person brings to the
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connection your unmet needs your
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childhood wounds your shadow the parts
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of yourself you haven't faced and when
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you chase someone who does this one
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thing you're not really chasing them
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you're chasing something inside yourself
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so what is the behavior to watch for
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emotional inconsistency people who act
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warm one day cold the next people who
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say they care but disappear when you
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need the most people who give you just
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enough hope to keep you hanging on but
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never enough presence to feel secure
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young warned about this dynamic he
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believed that when someone's actions and
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words don't align it creates a deep
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psychological tension in us a hunger for
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resolution a need to make sense of the
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confusion and here's the trap the more
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confusing someone is the more we chase
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them because the human mind craves
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clarity it wants to close the loop to
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get the answer to feel safe again but
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here's Jung's wisdom until you make the
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unconscious conscious it will direct
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your life and you will call it fate in
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words if you don't recognize what's
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driving you to chase you'll keep
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repeating the same painful patterns so
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why do we chase emotionally inconsistent
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people because their unpredictability
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triggers old wounds maybe from parents
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who were loving one day distant the next
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maybe from past relationships where love
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was conditional and deep down part of us
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believes if I can just win this person's
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love I'll finally prove I'm worthy but
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here's Young's warning chasing love to
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heal your wounds will only deepen them
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emotionally healthy people the kind who
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are capable of deep steady love don't
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leave you guessing they don't make you
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beg for scraps of affection they don't
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turn intimacy into a puzzle you have to
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solve so if you notice yourself
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constantly chasing someone who is hot
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and cold unclear about their feelings
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distant after moments of closeness
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always keeping you in emotional limbo
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pause and ask yourself "What part of me
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is chasing old pain what am I really
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trying to prove?" Jung believed that
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many of our relationships are driven by
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projection we project unmet needs onto
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people we assign them roles from our
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past we turn them into symbols of
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healing we never received but no one can
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heal what you won't face in yourself and
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no one no matter how magnetic is worth
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abandoning your peace for here's
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something else Yung taught the privilege
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of a lifetime is to become who you truly
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are you can't become your true self
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while chasing someone who keeps pulling
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you away from it you can't build a life
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of wholeness while pouring your energy
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into someone who thrives on your
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emptiness so what should you do instead
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here are three steps inspired by Yung's
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wisdom step one pause the chase stop
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responding to every breadcrumb stop
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explaining yourself to someone who isn't
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listening create space not to punish
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them but to reclaim your clarity step
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two reflect on the projection ask "What
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does this person represent for me what
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am I hoping they will fix in me where
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have I felt this dynamic before?" You'll
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often find it's not about them at all
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it's about an old wound seeking
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resolution step three reprint your own
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heart give yourself what you've been
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chasing externally validation security
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kindness consistency because when you
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meet your own needs you no longer
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tolerate relationships that starve you
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and here's the paradox the moment you
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stop chasing you start attracting
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healthier connections because you show
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up not as someone needing to be
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completed but as someone who is already
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whole jung believed your visions will
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become clear only when you can look into
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your own heart stop looking for love in
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people who confuse you start looking for
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clarity in yourself because when you
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build inner peace you stop craving outer
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chaos when you cultivate self-love you
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stop tolerating conditional love and
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when you stand in your wholeness you
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attract relationships rooted in truth
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not trauma so if you're watching this
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and you've been chasing someone who
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sends mixed signals let this be your
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sign not to hate them not to blame them
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but to choose yourself to honor the part
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of you that is done chasing confusion
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and ready to walk toward love that feels
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clear steady and true because the love
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you deserve won't leave you guessing
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won't make you chase and won't keep
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wounding the very heart that longs to
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heal if this message resonated with you
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comment below i choose clarity over
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chasing and remember you are worthy of
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love that comes toward you with honesty
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and peace until next time stay kind stay
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conscious and keep becoming