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Has your boyfriend or the guy you’re dating told you that he needs space?
Are you unsure what that means for you, him, and your relationship when he says he wants space?
It’s really difficult to know what to do when a guy says he needs space. You have loads of questions whizzing around your head. And luckily, we have answers.
So if he says he needs space, here are some critical things you need to know.
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0:00
The guy you're seeing has just told you that he needs some space
0:03
It has probably confused the hell out of you, right? After all, you thought things were going so well
0:07
And now you feel uncertain about everything. I know your head must be full of questions
0:13
And although I don't have all of the answers, I've got some answers for you
0:17
Hopefully they can give you some solid guidance for how to actually move forward
0:22
Why do some men need space? There are plenty of men out there who find the prospect of commitment quite scary
0:28
This guy, the guy that you're seeing, might need space because he feels like the relationship is just developing too fast for him
0:36
Maybe he really does like you, and that is just a terrifying prospect
0:41
He's not used to taking somebody else's needs into account. It's going to take some time for him to adapt to the idea that he's suddenly sharing life with another person with you
0:53
Maybe he wants to be sure that it's the right thing to do before
0:58
Or he puts his heart on the line. Maybe his last relationship ended fairly recently, and he's just not sure whether he's ready
1:07
to actually jump into something more serious, something new. Maybe he's got other things going on in his life and just doesn't have the emotional energy
1:16
to put it into relationship with you right now. Or maybe he's having trouble with his family, work, mental health, or just need some space
1:24
to figure things out. Essentially, his need for space is probably far more about him than it is about you
1:32
I know that probably doesn't make you feel any better at all, but it's the truth
1:38
Does this mean he's not interested? Maybe and maybe not. It's true that some guys can be a little bit cowardly and say they need space from a relationship
1:47
just because they can't bring themselves to be upfront and end things straight off
1:52
That's not acceptable behavior, but it's something that's something. a lot of people do and it's not exclusive to men. Women do it too. But he might genuinely just
2:01
need some space. Maybe he wants to use this space to work on a few things in his own life
2:07
in the hope that this building of your relationship could actually work out in a long term
2:13
So don't jump into any conclusions about what this means about his feelings for you. Listen to
2:19
your gut And if it tells you that there is something there be willing to give him a benefit of the doubt How should I react when a guy says he needs space This guy has just told you that he needs space from a relationship So now what
2:34
If you still want things to work out between you, then the only way, the right way to react is to take a deep breath
2:40
smile and let he know that you respect his decision. There's absolutely no point trying to talk him out of it or change his mind
2:47
That would just serve to push him away. Do your best to not take it personally
2:52
This probably isn't about you after all, but about him, so try to bear that in mind
2:57
On the other hand, if his request for space is just the latest of a long line of signs
3:03
that he's just not that into you, perhaps it's time to say goodbye
3:07
Let him know he can have all the space he likes just because you've decided there's absolutely
3:12
no future between you. Should we stay in contact? It's okay to check in now and then to make sure that he's actually okay if you really want to
3:20
If this is a guy that you want, then yeah, do. Plus, you might have to see him at work or under some other circumstances
3:28
but be wary of initiating too much of a contact. And don't be tempted to try to lure him into a long conversation
3:36
If he initiates chat, then that's okay. But try to keep the conversation short and sweet
3:44
Try to be the one to bring the conversation to a close
3:47
so that he sees that you are respecting him. his request for space and you're not being needy
3:53
He'll probably be grateful for that. After all, space is what he was looking for
3:59
And maybe the fact that you aren't chasing after him will make him wonder whether you've
4:03
started losing interest. It might even change his mind about wanting quite so much space
4:10
Does this mean we are on a break? The term break is often used for time out from a long-term relationship
4:17
But if you are in that strange no-man's land between being to
4:20
not being together, not being a proper couple, then you're probably confused as to what is acceptable and what isn't
4:28
If the two of you hadn't decided that you were seeing each other exclusively, then you are free to meet new people and do whatever your conscience tells you that is okay
4:37
But if you agree that you were exclusive, then request for space doesn't necessarily give you green lights to date or sleep with other people
4:46
This just isn't a matter of listening to your gut. If you want this relationship to work and think it has a future then you probably want to be on the side of caution and not date anybody else until the situation between the two of you has been resolved Most certainly don go
5:04
sleeping around. How can I win him back? There's not much you can do in these sort of situations
5:10
After all, any contact you make with him is going against his request for space. Lots of people
5:16
try the indirect tactic via social media. They post pictures of themselves, having a great time
5:22
in an attempt to make him feel jealous or showing what he's missing
5:26
That is something that you should do best to avoid. If you want to post on social media, it should be for your own benefit
5:34
not because you're hoping he'll see it. The best way of winning him back is also very conveniently the best thing for you
5:42
Live your life to the full. Spend the time with your friends and family
5:46
This is the time that you can utilize for yourself. Do all the things that make you happy
5:51
embrace things that make you sparkle. The main person you are doing all of that for should be yourself
6:00
You're not doing it for him. But as an added bonus, going out and grabbing life by the horns
6:06
will also let him know that you don't need him in your life to have a good time
6:11
You don't depend on him. This can suddenly make you seem far more appealing and remind him what a catch you are
6:18
How long will this last? How long should I wait? Now, this is a funny question
6:23
It's kind of like, how long is a piece of string? What's more important is for you to decide how long you want for him to make up his mind
6:31
It could be anything from a couple of days to a few weeks, but anything more than a month is definitely pushing
6:38
He knows you've got life, and he just can't expect you to hold on for him for that long
6:44
He might specify the amount of time that he needs, but if he doesn't, then that is your decision
6:49
How long are you actually prepared to wait for him? You might consider setting a deadline of how long you're honestly willing to hang on
6:58
If you really like this guy and you think that there's future for you there, the deadline may be longer
7:04
If he doesn't come back to you by that date, you can let him know that you just can't wait for him anymore
7:11
You have a life to live. They will either help him realize that he wants you back or just set you free
7:18
How can I keep my mind of him? If you really like this guy then having this time apart from him is going to be tough I not gonna lie to you it going to be tough for you I sorry but there no two ways about that But you shouldn spend the whole time just thinking about him
7:33
and worrying about what's going to happen to your future together. Keep yourself busy
7:38
Spend time with your friends and throw yourself into work and your hobbies
7:42
This is the time for you. That way, if he does decide that the relationship isn't right
7:48
you'll already have a full busy life that doesn't feel lacking. just because it doesn't include him
7:54
All right? And there is all for me today. I hope this video has shed some light on why some men ask for space
8:01
and what you should do when you're in situation like that. Remember that relationships are really straightforward
8:08
and that him asking for space doesn't have to be bad news
8:13
Stay positive and don't torture yourself about trying to guess what he's thinking or planning to do
8:19
You can only face whatever happens when it happens. You can't face it before it actually happened
8:25
For now, respect his needs for space and get on with your own life
8:30
If you have any thoughts or comments you'd like to add, drop it below in this video
8:36
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9:06
All right, and that is it for me for this month. All the other videos are going to be from Jessica
9:13
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9:18
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9:27
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9:38
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